Yeah, I'm a little mixed up about that whole - he's doing steps 3 and 4, and now YOU are feeling guilty about something?
His 12 steps are ALLL about HIS actions. Not yours. Not at all.
But if you really want to find some peace, why not check out Alanon? You get to keep your abstract idea of a higher power... you do NOT have to believe in anyone elses or any institution's concept of God. Really. In fact, when I started, I used the power of a successful program as my "Higher Power". Heck... I figured, if I could believe in the power of Weight Watchers...smile... then I could believe in the power of Alanon.
If you do decide to try Alanon or Naranon, I would suggest you go to at least 6 meetings before making a decision whether it is for you or not. Meetings have "personalities" that change depending on where they are held, the time of day and who is present.
I wish you the best.