Welcome Inthisforme – One place I started was with counting my blessings. Like prodigal said, sometimes the littlest thing can be big when it is yours. I get down a lot too, want to run to him to make myself feel better, and don’t think that sometimes I don’t, I just have the luxury of knowing mine is locked in a jail cell, safe and sober. Sad to think that that comforts me. But, I count my blessing when I get down. I think about my friends, my house, animals, family. If you have to think about them, be thankful that you are able to love someone the way you love her. My friend told me that lots of people are too selfish or materialistic to ever know what it is like to truly love someone and even though it hurts, it is something to be thankful about. As well as that you are loved. Maybe not the way you deserve to be by her but if you give that much love then think of all the love you must get from your other loved ones.
Try to think positive. I picture (no laughing) in the center of my body your “core” and think about my center of being. I focus on that part and think to myself that I am really OK in there. No one can touch me or hurt me if I don’t let them. I calm myself that way when I get upset or nervous or can’t sleep. Believe me, I lost a lot of sleep over the years. All you can do is control you. Hang in there, keep coming here. I haven’t been here that long but I started my first post with the same sentences you did! Hugs…