Searching ... yeah paranoia is common (I think)
I spent almost 24 hours locked up in solitary confinement in the Yuma County Jail because I tried to "kill" my AH. He had accused me of the same thing when we lived in Maryland, but that time he only locked me out of the bedroom. I had never, ever laid a hand on my husband! I think the paranoia is an outgrowth of their delusional thinking because listen to the quacking they'll do to convince you they are NOT A's!
I'll have to go back and look at my first post. I don't think I mentioned "... but when he's sober he's a great guy and I love him." I was more along the lines of what is "normal"? I'd been in nutland for so long I think I didn't know what I really felt or what was real. Whew!