But I admit I'm still confused... and this IS society's fault, I think. We are taught to "do unto others" from a very early age. Some of our actions (right or wrong) we have believed to be acts of kindness. It is very hard to tell the difference sometimes.
I think what I was taught 'from an early age' is not what society taught me, in my case its what I was taught as a child. I was raised in a disfunctional home and didn't learn how to be healthy.
The do unto others thing..
Lets talk about this.
I do not want to be told what to do, when, how much of it, and what will happen if I dont. Im an adult.
Adults in my life have the freedom to choose what actions they will make and thier choices are theirs.
By enabling, I was taking away a grown mans choices. I was also creating and perpetuating a very false sense of security....I was blocking the natural progression of consequences by coming right behind him fixing things. I wont specualte what that did to him, but I will tell you what it left me with.
Anger, disappointment, resentment, and hurt.
Enabling is not treating others the way I would like to be treated.
I hope others will give me the freedom to be who I am, not what they want for me. I hope others will allow me the logical consequences of my actions, so that I dont miss the lesson in them, continually repeating the same self-destructive patterns longer than necessary.