Deciding to stay or leave is a very difficult decision for a lot of us. I got the strength to do it by reading the posts here and by talking to my therapist and family... finally realizing that if I stayed with my AH, that I had years of the same b.s. to look forward to. Would there be some happy moments in those years? Probably, but I deserve more than that. I deserve to have a husband who cares for me the way I care for him. I deserve to be with someone really great. I'm trying really hard now to understand why I was willing to tolerate such unacceptable behavior for these past six years.
Reading the posts here has been an incredible source of strength and learning for me. I copy and paste many things people say here into emails to myself to remind myself of all the golden info to be had here. And it has helped me immensely.
Hang in there LeslieJo...keep reading and posting.
P.S. I don't mean to make leaving sound easy! It is a struggle for me still. I just don't see how I could allow myself to succomb to the alternative. Sometimes I feel "weak" and just want to rush into his arms. Just want to hold him and smell his neck. And I have to literally hold myself back. I keep telling myself I can't base a lifetime on good spooning.