Thanks for all your comments and believe me I take all of them to heart!
I know it's my daughters feelings that I am repressing but, I don't know how else to let her know that daddy is sick. She already knows this. But probably doesn't understand it.
He has been sober two years and in the program two years with a sponser and all that... Even his new AA friends have talked to him about how he is with his kids. And I am reading a book on verbal abuse (just started it though). I always thought of it as mental abuse on my part.
Thanks to all of you.