It's so important for us to have and process our feelings at any age and moreso as children. It's not a matter of an adult winning here. His choice of behavior/words has nothing to do with your daughter. He is choosing to dump his **** on a helpless child rather than on another adult who might call him on it.
I hope you can also let her know she is not responsible for his actions, she didn't cause him to treat her this way, it's nothing she did or didn't do. She'll be able to come through more easily if she knows it isn't her fault.
I have found much help through Al-Anon and one-on-one counseling as a parent and as a spouse. Good luck to you.