Walmart was good. I am going out to dinner
with my sister and to the casino. I don't
get out enough, and I need to.
The whole thing here is guilt. I have not
been the best mother, very emotionally un-
available to my chidren when they were
growing up. And I have tried to make up for
it. I can't change the past. I know that
I have hurt them deeply due to my "disorders."
So I still feel that I have "caused" this,
but when I read of success stories here, I
know there is worse and they can make it.
My grandson is getting a award tomorrow at
school. I get tears in my eyes just thinking
about it. He is my "special" grandchild and
I have tried my best to protect him. He has
seen too much and been through too much at
8 years old, and the family target.
M.G., I was going to say I give up, but
I didn't. But that's exactly how I feel.
I give up. I have to take care of myself.
Love to all,