The last 2 days have been GREAT! No anxiety at all. It's kinda scary though. As much as I wanted it to go I also kind of miss the reminder.
I am sure it may pop up again but I have been feeling really swell. I can hardly wait to the next AA meeting to discuss this and the pitfalls to look out for. I am not fooling myself into thinking "i'm cured" for I know there is no cure.
Doing lots of reading. "Living Sober" was a nice starter book for me. Only a couple days left in that and I will be onto the Big Book. I have never been a real religious man (more of a searching agnostic) but a very good friend of mine who is an evangelical Christian has given me a bunch of audio stuff from a Pastor James MacDonald that is really good. He kinda breaks it all down to the lowest common denominator for "ME". One of the sermons was "Getting out of the Valley". Boy did it ring true about the self absorbtion and me, me, me attitude that I carried while I drank.
I was kind of tested last night too. I am a Beaver/Cub leader and we had planned to go for a night hike. As it turns out 2 of the othe leaders didn't show for various reasons and it was left up to myself and the only other leader who was freaking about having to take 18 kids into the bush for a hike.
I told her "no problem we got this". So off we go into the dark with only a flashlight leading our way through the pitch and the drizzle.
We got back with all the kids loving it and wanting to go do it again. HAHA
And me not once ME thinking that "oh boy, I'll need a drink when I get home".
After reflecting this morning on our excursion the previous night I came to a wired paradoxial thought. It was interesting that "I" was guiding 18 innocent children through the dark with only a thin beam of light to see our way. And only 7 days before I had a couple people in MY life shining a different kind of light to help ME out of the dark. Reflection is SO important!
It really does make you think that there is a reason for EVERYTHING!
Thought of the day for ya all...
"To climb a mountain, starts with the first step and lots of gear. If you stumble on your way you may just find yourself at the bottom again" DON'T STUMBLE and keep the peak insight!
(can't believe I thought of that today LOL)
NO FEAR!
Hoeboe