good evening to everyone
it's saturday night, and i, too am sitting here alone with my dog and watching wizard of oz.
and i am so thankful.
if xah were here, he would have already been verbally abusing me for about 7 hours, trying to make me feel it is all my fault that he is so fu**ed up and needs to drink, trying to make me feel that i am worthless as a wife, woman, and lover.
thank god for being alone on this wonderful, saturday night with the serenity and peacefullness of wizard of oz and my dog, rudy.
imo....we do not miss the chaos....we miss and mourn what we thought we could make the alcoholic into......a sober, responsible, caring mate.
try to enjoy your peaceful evening of no chaos and insanity.
i understand your feelings so well..........have spent numerous hours with the gut wrenching hopeless feeling in the pit of my stomach because he was gone...then a light bulb comes on for me...........yes.......he is gone. i no longer have to tolerate his behaviors, i can choose to do whatever i want this evening without having the curse of the disease weighing me down.
blessings to you
jeri