Kermit, I think the feelings you're going through indicate that you're human!
You'd be a robot if you didn't have these feelings! "This too will pass" and in the meantime, please be kinder to you and I hope you can come up with some positive things to do or read or learn. Please keep sharing, because it really is good therapy and a means to healing.
One very important thing, Kermit... making the RIGHT decision doesn't always feel GOOD. But it does feel RIGHT! Since God works in mysterious ways, I'm sure you'll get moments of reinforcement that your decision was right!
During your alone time, you may find as I did.... that I was a pretty decent person and deserved the good life. I even got to like and enjoy my own company!
You're never alone if you have God in your life and hopefully you know that you have friends here who care about you, including me.
Good luck to you and Hugs,
Luv