Hi Stacey,
Congrats on the 19 days, you have done well despite the people around you. I think it's imperative to have a sponser. I thought I had done steps 1-3 on my own. Once I found a sponser we had to start over. It's important to discuss honest feelings about these steps and enure an understanding of each. It wasn't like a checklist, I had to study the 12x12 and the material offered for each step, we read each chapter of each step, I had to journal and discuss my feelings for these and then got the thumbs up to progress on each one. I am going to finish step 3 with my sponser tomorrow, yea it took more than one sitting to do it. I have begun rereading the Big Book, studying the 12x12, and the 12 steps for women to prepare for taking step 4. I know this is going to take a few sit downs with my sponser so I can be complete, and thourough with it. I used to feel rushed about getting through the steps but have realized the importance about taking eachone by piecemeal so to speak. It's been better for me and I feel confident that I have actually "worked" for each step.
Good luck, find a sponser!