Day 10
Well, it's 8am and this day has already been trying on me. I got up at 6am this morning and went to my new job. To start, there were only 2 girls there and they both hated me, I could tell. They were redneck hicks and here I am in my Aeropostale shirt. They asked where I was from and I said Midland and they actually snorted! (Midland is known for being stuck up, I'm not though!!) And then no one trained me really, just this kid that was at the machine next to me sort of showed me what to do and then said everything that I did wrong (crinkle the tape a little bit) I was going to get yelled at. Then the plastic thingies I was stacking irritated my skin to no end. (I have really sensitive skin) and I was sweating like a pig by 7:30am! I don't know....everything just kinda built up. Then we were supposed to take these boxes and stack them 5 high but they were so heavy I couldn't even lift them!! I just couldn't do it! I know I know...ask for help but...who ya know? Everyone had their own machines and everyone was busy doing their own thing. I just kept thinking....I didn't go to school for 6 years for this. I'm working with a bunch of hicks that had already discussed drugs before work. I just couldn't do it. I asked to use the restroom and took off. Not the most responsible thing I've done in my life but...I didn't really know what else to do. First of all, my sobriety was in jeapardy. I haven't learned to control days like that ya know? When ya get out of a loooooong day of work like that. I've always gotten a beer, I guess I just kinda freaked. Sigh....I don't know what to do. I'm not proud of what I did but with my skin all broken out the way it was, there wasn't much else I could do. Sigh...well, it's only 8am and I already feel like I've been awake for hours......let's hope I make it through today....I need to chill out though...I'm not in the best of spirits or mood's right now....I'm going to go read the big book and maybe hit the 10am meeting....
Stacey