Sarah,
Please allow me to give you a big cyber-hug. You have been through so much and have such a forgiving spirit. Sometime things happen in life that we cannot change and this is one of them. Your father should be professionally detoxed but that is impossible if he refuses to go into a hospital. Try telling him he can go now while he still can make the decision or he will end up there when he is no longer able.
Hugs,
JT