We oftentimes enter into recovery having no idea what to expect and no true identity for ourselves. To peel back the layers of insecurities and rediscover our self-worth takes time, but there are a few things we can do to ease the process along. Here are 3 ways to conquer self-doubt in recovery and tap into the inner strength we all have within us.
1. Don’t Waste Time Comparing Yourself to Others.
We all have our secrets and something hidden in the shadows that we keep safely hidden in the walls of our homes or within our own minds. So you are wasting time when you compare yourself to a false image that someone else wants you to believe is their reality. You are only filling yourself up with more self-doubt if you are constantly trying to catch up to someone else, be better than someone else or have more than someone else. That attitude only brings resentment, jealousy, frustration and anger.
Instead, try to focus on being the best possible version of you that you can be. There is no one else on this planet that has walked in your shoes, that has endured the pain that you have or have seen the beauty in your life but you. There is also no one else in this world that knows what you truly need and desire to fill your soul but you and your Higher Power. The only way to stay true to that is to keep the focus on finding out exactly what that is, going at your own pace to get it and not worrying about what anyone else is doing. In fact, if you have anyone in your life who is trying to push you to do more and to be at a pace that is uncomfortable for you, it just might be time to show them the door.
2. Let Go of the People Who Don’t Believe in You.
Surrendering to alcohol is a very brave and courageous act to do in of itself and that alone should be celebrated! You may already be doubting yourself if you can do it, so why allow anyone into your life that will add additional doubt to your success in recovery? If anyone—and this includes drinking buddies, family, friends, coworkers, neighbors, spouses—doesn’t encourage you in your recovery, then it’s time to put that relationship on pause.
You may even be surprised to find that some people you once thought you needed, you no longer want back in your life. This can be painful at first but it is better than having so much doubt in your life that is causes you to give in and pick up the bottle. Remember, you surrendered because you believed in yourself. Don’t let the negativity, codependency, insecurities or jealousy of others hold you back. This is your life and you need to take every step you can to build yourself back up. The only person that has to believe in you is you.
3. Keep Looking Up.
It doesn’t matter what you have done, there is no need to live the rest of your life in shame, guilt and regret. We have all had failures, caused someone some type of pain and have made mistakes—and I am not just talking about those of us with an addiction. So maybe some people have made bigger mistakes or caused more harm than others, but the purest, strongest, bravest, most courageous and compassionate people I have ever met are those that have endured those struggles and learned from the pain.
The past does not define you. Every day you are learning, growing, adding to what you have already learned and accomplished. So appreciate the new beginning, what you have in your life now and keep moving forward one moment at a time with your head up and your shoulders back!