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Ebony OA Meeting

Old 01-12-2003, 10:44 AM
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Hey Ebony,did you got to Burnett elementary? I think it was called that. My last place I lived in LB was 7th and Coronado. When I was 7 I use to live on 10th and lime. Hey do you rememer I think it was called hansens grocery store. Um it was a little dangerous for me to go some places in the hood being blonde and all,but I did just about go every place! There was a Baures amblence and Taco bell where I use to walk to school when I was at Roosevelt. I remember the chant of th Cheerleades atpol and the color were green and gold. "go you rabbit's mighty mighty rabbits" Or don't be sad dont be blue,frankenstine was ugly too, uhuh,ya,uhuh... The bruens were maroon an gold I believe. I tried out for cheer leading at Wilson, but was too poor! Hey I wonder if they still have the gang the "Longos". When I lived on Rose and PCH, there were a mix of everyone even gypsys! Too fun! I knew everyone or at least talked to people. I was safe except on PCH on the way to Poly. My favorite lunch item was the strawberry crunch bars and I loved the now and laters we got off the ice cream truck. Hey remember Norms the Resteraunt?
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Old 01-12-2003, 11:28 AM
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you're a real true homie!

Been there done that, Cherry Park brings back many memories but I didn't do crafts there. MacAthur Park and Recreation Parks I know best. I know all those area you mentioned but I actually went to Franklin Jr High off of 7th and Cerritos. I remember Hansens market, my best friend live off of Myrtle and PCH. I lived off of 10th and Myrtle so it's likely we know each other.

I made most of the HS reunions for Poly I may have seen you there.

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Old 01-12-2003, 02:00 PM
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O now I remember Franklin! You lived on the good side of town I think. Ya,we useto have picknics at recreation park. Remember all the Eucaliptic trees. Gee, I sure get a little pissed at my spelling! Ugh! Did you use to watch the rams practice? Did you use to go to the lagoon to swim? I use to go to bay shore,then Seal beach to surf or boogy board! We use to go to the Olympic pool to swim too. It was a quarter to get in! I have two brothers whostill live in LB. I never have gone to any reunions, I got a GED at 18. I dropped out of school because I was too afraid to go at Poly ( me and my brother got jumped on the way to school and my brother was almost killed). And by the time I went back to Wilson, I was already too use to being on my own,plus it was a rich people's school. It's so important for my kidsnow to be in school and try and dogood! I actualy love the old long beach,it's too grown now into a very large city! I was back a few years ago and took my girls to the parks of my childhood!
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Old 01-12-2003, 08:11 PM
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yeah recreation park was one of my favorite place as a child and I do rememer the trees. Not very many people believe me when I say the Rams use to practice there a the stadium, the pool was in Belmont shore.

I'm glad you shared your story about the Hair Salon with me because that took a lot of courage. It put things into perspective for me. Not too many people know what a hot comb is. I'm sorry you experienced such mistreatment. Oh yeah I'm about ten years old than you.

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Old 01-13-2003, 06:40 AM
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Hey ya Ebony! Gosh, I don't get to talk much about my "real childhood to many people because #1 they just do not get it, and #2 they think I'm full of it and #3 if I was talking about things to a person of color they might think I was "trying to get on their good side" if ya know what I mean. Me as a person and as a child, I was always open to just about any exsperiance. I asked questions. I found that if you ask questions that you really want to know about, people will open up. I was interested in why people of color used oil in their hair,why they used a straitening comb, what were exstentions... I guess I just like to know things. I feel too that living in Long Beach as a kid, there was so much going on! Things just did not happen to one race or another, it happened to us all. I feel blessed truly that I was from a generation that learned about things of people with color. What Salvery was still doing even many years after abloishment. It's like an evolving process into a true = rights! I'm not saying that there is not still hold backs and such, because there is! What I truly believe and hope for all the next generations of any givin color here in the USA is that there is true equality and a respect of different cultures. It takes sperate ingreadance to make a good cake. We cannot make the cake without one or the other. It will fall flat without the yeast, be thin without the eggs and so on... I think too that if any race puts too much of one thing and not the other, then it's going to be a yucky cake. Ballance is the key, and we all have to work together on that balance. I'm soooo glad that we can talk about these things! It's important! I feel that working on a solution will eleviate most of the problems and yes it will take women to do it because men screw things up! No offence Jon, vinnie and JT! OK, what if God's wife mother nature got real pissed at God for giving her child to suffer just to prove a point. A woman would get angry. I think this time in our generations and generations to come that the spirit of a woman really wants to get rid of the suffering and build not on pain to learn, but with love and guidance like a mother should! And mother nature would tell God, to sit back and let her do the job right!
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Old 01-13-2003, 07:13 AM
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Hey Ebony,did ya notice how many views we have had on this post, but no one is jumping in! I wonder why? In my day, I was called homegirl by my friends. Gosh, from my friends of latin blood, I learned many cuss words in spanish I took spanish in school, but it was a whole different langage than the real spanish I learned on the streets! In my elementary school, we all respected what we had to give! I remember being in the gifted program and we did a play about the signing of the Declaration of Indipendance. Too funny! I plaied the parts of Robert E. Lee and of Tomas Jefferson's wife. The part palied of Gorge Washingotm was palied by an oriental desent boy, Tomas Jefferson by a boy of color and it goes on and on... We did not care about the text of the play nor of our history, we just had fun being up on stage wearing costumes, white wigs and trying to do the dance off that time (minuet I believe it was called). In school I was the 2nd fastest runner out of every boy and girl. I had lots of practice running from my brothers (I WAS THE ONLY GIRL) and running to and from school because I was afraid of being mugged! It happened a lot just because I was young and a girl. Ha, I never did have much money to take any way! The most popular girl in school was a girl of color named Tonya. The teachers just loved her because she was smart and smelled of soap every day. Ha, I was lucky if I took a bath once a week back then and had my hair brushed once a week too. Now I was deffentaly the one with "nappy hair"! I remember my mom would not get up in the morning, so I went next door to a nighbors hose. She was a woman of color and she woud brush my hair for me. My Mom would get so mad because the woman would come and yell at my mom for not taking care of me! My girls hair now is always cut nice (and short) and I take extra care just because of my child hood. Ha, I can write a lot, sorry! How is SF today? I lived in San Mateo for about 4 months. I did't like it much! Too cold!
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Old 01-13-2003, 08:22 AM
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Me again Eboney. You must have been at Poly when the little girl was shot! The age differece matches or almost. HeyEb, when my brother and I got jumped it broght back the memory of my mother's boyfriend tryingto kill her. I was about 8 and I heard fighting while I was in bed. I ran to my mother's room and he was on top of her on the floor choaking her. She was turning blue and her eye balls were poping out. Ijumped on his back andpulled his hair and scratched his face. He tried to throw me off,but I would not budge. Then my brothers came in and kicked his ass. Anyway, that was only one of the times he tried to kill my mom. So when my brother and I got jumped at the age of 14, there wasa huge group of young African American's. One boy got a hold of my brother (my twin) and got him on the ground and was choaking him and my brother was dying. I snapped like I did when I was saving my mom's life (during this time,the other kids were yelling "kill him leroy,kill the *****", and they were laughing) I jumped on this kids back and pulled his hair,clawed him and drew blood. Funny thing is is that all the laughing stopped and there was anger. 3 boys tried to pull me off of leroy, and the kidscalled me awhite bitch and said lets kill her too. Well, I beleive in God because a man pulled up in car and told me and my brother to jump in. I grabbed my brother and pulled him in the car with me. Then at the age of 24 my ex husbankicked my ass in front of all his buddies (white and my mothers boy friend was white too) I snaped and hit his ass back then he knocked me out. Anyway,my point is is that people of any color can be mean I know that from exsperiance. God has given me the courage to fight back and to save the people I love when they need me and the same at times have been done for me. My brother useto away when I got mugged as a kid (like 8-10), but proected me from my mother at times and her boy friend after I saved his ass I hate violence and the only time Isee it now is when my kids fight
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Old 01-13-2003, 10:29 AM
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That's so bad zoomer that they jumped you! I get so angry at my people when they act stupid! You had it rough. I don't remember the girl getting shot at Poly.

I remember walking around in the neighboorhood off of Orange and Anaheim and watching these black kid picking on white kid and I stopped it. Yes, hate and stupidity come from both sides.
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Old 01-13-2003, 11:51 AM
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Hey Ebony, I forgot to add that there are also good people of any color! Trust me when I say I'm greatful for my room mate when I went to LA Job Corps! Again I was one out of two people with no color out of hundreds. Anyway, I believe in God because my roomy was the Tallest,biggest meanest girl of color in the place. She protected me and also taught me a few things to protect my self. She was also a clean freak! Ha, she would yell if I left drops of water in our sink. I went to her house a few times to stay over. When I went to sleep at night,it was the safest and peaceful night's sleep I ever had. Her Mom was real nice, as was every one of her family. I went to a party,and no one said a word,well she would have if any one messed with me. Ha, I was friends with her brother,but his ex thought I was his new girl friend,so that was a sticky moment. We took buses back then. went through Watts and the gangs actually shot at the bus in this one section of town. My roomy and I lay face to face on the floor of the bus until we got out of that part of Watts. It was what she was use to and knew how to stay safe. I was "like Wow OMG this is so exciting and terrifying". It was a war zone right here in the good old USA just like in the middle east. Ebony that is what I'd like to see change too. Here in the USA and middle east. I don't know if things will ever change,but we can always hope!
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Old 01-13-2003, 04:11 PM
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Hey Ebony, I'm sorry too that my people were bad at times too. although I do have to say thatI'm mixed in a way except I look white. No,not with african american,but with Indian,greek,I think some german, you name it, I got it! My great, great Grand ma was full blood Cheriokee. My Mom said she would not really sit on the porch, but stoop and smoke a pipe of tabacco that is I told this one indian (american that is) that my GG grandma was full blood and he said most of the white people can claim some sort of indian blood (of course he said it in a nasty way). I mean gee, I hope that my Grandmother up in the big blue yander is looking out for me as well as "her people". I mean gee, if I had it my way,I'd look indian so I could have something to be proud of. Well, maybe not beause I do like my looks,but it's hard not having any roots sort of speak. Also, where you at Poly during the riots at Poly? A little girl of color was walking to school (my school) and got accidently shot by a drive by shooting. Us little kids had to stay inside to play at school beause of the riots across the street at Poly. And we had to take the long way to school (no busses then) because we all were afriad to be shot, us kids of all color. Now to thinkof it, why did't my mother take us to school? Well, my mom acually was not the take us any place type most of the time, but still you would thnk right! LOL!!! I get worried and watc my kids when they get off the bus 2 doors down!
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Old 01-13-2003, 07:11 PM
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zoomer,

You say you're mixed with several diffirent ethicities? But you are still European.

I was at Poly during the riot and I remembe it well. But what year did the little girl get shot?
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Old 01-13-2003, 07:28 PM
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Um, ebony, I'm an American. I have no idea what year that little girl got killed. I think I was in the 4th or 5th grade which would make me then 9 or 10 and I'm 39,so 30 years ago give or take which would make you 49 or 50 and back then you would have been 19 or 20,so maybe after your time at Poly. I'm not so good with years, so I'll let you figure it out maybe 1973 or 74? Hey ebony, I see in your bio, that you are a civle servent. I was a Paralegal once and an advocate for the disabled. I contracted for a city and not an employee,but what do you do? I liked working with the public and nothing bothred me as far as the work load. I did a lot of family court stuff and some public defender stuff. Ha, beleve it or not yes I wrote legal forms! Now how can a person with a learning disability write legal forms. Well, not very good because I'm no working any more! LOL!!!!!!!!! Ha, really it'sall just forms and too bad back then that I needed a computer not a word processer! I was too slow because I missed spelled every other word! Ha, my poor boss who was actually truly for real blind could not see mymistakes until the judge sent back some of my work with a nasty letter! he the ha to take his one sort of good eye and read word for word of anything I wrote to make sure I caught all my mistakes. Um, we both agreed that I was better off being a stay at home mom!
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Old 01-14-2003, 08:04 AM
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Hey Ebony, now I just have to ask, so don't get mad OK. If look white or of Europian decent, I would have to call myself that? I guess for me Iwant to embrace all different partsof me, even the darker parts of me, well I mean like the Indian Grandmother, and the greek grandmother. I'm more greek than anything I think as far as blood line goes. I can make it simple, but I do remember my GG grandmother and she knew me and called me her grandchild. I guess too I remember as a kid some of my friends had white mothers and black fathers. They too called me ***** and white trash and called them selves black, but were they not half white too? I know when I was in nursing school the amount of name calling between the different shades of color, but it did not make sence to me. it still does not! I guess for me 'd like to be proud of every thing, and not renounce any race.
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Old 01-14-2003, 12:29 PM
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Good Point!

zoomer,

You made a very good point

"I guess for me I'd like to be proud of every thing, and not renounce any race."

because all I have been doing is trying to classify you and I, put us in some specific catagory. We are trained do this as matter of habit because we are trying to find who we can trust.

I am just cautious about talking with people until I know where they are coming from. I was not always like this, as a matter of fact when I lived in Long Beach, I didn't expereince the racial tension I now sense everyday here in San Francisco.

It's been a culture shock for me living here in San Francisco. I grew up in church and am a practicing Christian. I never was taught to steal, lie, cheat or ever treat people bad because my parents never did that. They both lead wonderful Christian examples infront of me.

But everyday, 5 or 6 times a day someone will see my skin, not the content of my character and either lock their car door as I approach, clutch their purse or wallet like my black skins a magnet and it will suddenly be drawn to my hands. I'M NO THEIF! But each day I am treated as one before I have any time to prove other wise!

It drivess me insane to put up this everyday!
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Old 01-14-2003, 01:31 PM
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Hay ebony,I know that it must hurt! I know when I go anyplace and I smile at everyone. I too get a mistrusted look from people with color "like why are you smiling at me". I truly don't carewhat color people are or what religion they practice,no big deal as long as they are nice. I too am a Christian or at least try to be every day inwhat I know about trying to be nice. I believe in one god, and all religions stem from that one god. There are diferent understndings base on where people come from. Mabe religions are based on the adaption of the enviroment and elements and grew as people moved from place to place oradapted. I believe that Jesus was born to help twards a better way of life and I also believe that maybe Budda was born for the same reason. I believe that different people are born every day to help make the world a better place,just like some are born to disroy it. Some ofGod's gifts can be in the form of a song,a poem, a smile, or just some one talking. I believe n signs. I can't help it, but I get warings or feelings when something is wrong or right. I can analize this and see the pyscological point of view, but the beauty of a true miriacal cannot be dismist. Also, I feel there are a lot of mistakes being made and it scares me to no end for my children's sake. Also, I believe smart is smart, and i know you or I would never walk some places a lone or after dark. The most horrible thing happened to me by white men, so I know it's not color or white that can ham, it is both, it is alo both that can make things better. Today my girls know no raisizem, they are not face with it because I live in a white world. I see thestupid **** of these people here (I wrote you a PM, did you get it). The thing that they did was so wrong! I could cry about it and did. When the principal at my daughtr school tried to blame my girl (she is ADHD aeasy to blame for things) anyway, I said no way and made her say she as sorry even if she just laughed at what ws said. Anyway, the little girl on the bus was being mean, but the boy had no right to say the things he did. I don'tknow if it was before or after the incident that SS was called on this family because they got mad at what happend on the bus and did demand a look at why tse kids could do thisin this day and age. Anyway, the family left inordero have peace and not hounded by the school here or SS. It makes me sick. Ofcourse I'm a blended family (I did the blending as far as different fathers) and anyway, if the school screw up, ofcourse it's my and my disfunctional family looked at! My girl was not aloud in the girl scouts because of the stuck up people here. it's who you know toget in! I raised a big stink, but dropped it because I could not even put m family through the mill. Too many skelletens in my closet! It still burns me up though! Keep the faith and one day it will get better!
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Old 01-14-2003, 06:14 PM
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Hey Ebony,the reason I like the WIR forum is because it's about women's issues and recovery in any form. I'm very strange Ebony, but a good strange. I sometimes trust too much, but am learning not to be so trusting. It's very hard for me not to trust,but for my sake and my kids sake I have to learn. Sure Iv lived in fear from true harm most of my life,but I never gave up hope that one day I would be safe and happy. I'm not 100% happy, but I'm happier now just to beable to "talk" to women about real issues. I'm as safe as can be as far as real harm coming to me unless I'm in the wrong place at the wrong time. I'm not rich, nor am I poor, but we are feeling the pitch of our life style from too much fun and not enough income coming in right now,but that too will change. My husband works and has been at the same job for over 20 years through thick and thin. He is no prince charming, but he is no abuser either. He is safe, sturdie and a bit boring,but I'm a bit too exciting a little flaky,but safe too. I'm able to say how I feel, but there I times I say to much. He sometimes does not say enough. Our goal is o raise our children ina safe happy place although there are times when you can't make your child happy no matter what! I was raise in hell,but sometimes we did have a lot of fun. I saw moments of my mother's love and fun. I did't much like her organic stage though and tofo sucks,but carbib is OK and I like Guwava. I learned not to be afraid to try something new from her. My sons's are lke that too, but they have their sides that I don't like. They are mostly raised by my ex, and he is from a very small town upstate NY. My Mom use to say "SMALL TOWNS SMALL MINDS". Well, some people were nice, but talk about culture shock! The nearest mall was 2 hours away! The cold weather, the wierd people who laughed at me all the time an terroized me! Anyway, don't let those jerks get to you! Smile at them big time and ak them if they are having some sort of fit or something and if ther is anything you can do to help them
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Old 01-16-2003, 06:04 AM
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ebony,I thought of you yesterday

This is why I believe in God and he is listioning! Yesterday I tookmy two youngest ou to lunch at the mall. I always groom them before we go out. Anyway, I got my daughter pizza, and I both were sitting down while I got soft tacos for my son not more than 10 feet away. Anyway there were two little old ladies sitting right next to them. I watched as the old ladies cooed and smiled at my kids. Anyway, I got the tacos and sat down. One of theold ladies said "you havethe most beautiful children and they are so sweet. She said can I ask if you are perhapsfrom over seas like Scandinavia because you and you childrens coloring is so beautiful with the blonde hair and darkeyes. I laughed as said "I'm from a very strange and distant land called California". She was puzzled just for a second and then laughed and said "I always wanted to go there" Then ofcourse, she taked about her ailments,her operations andeverything else in her life in less than 30 seconds. For some reson people feel comfortable talking to me. Of course too I'm as proud as a peacock when people compliment me on my babies. My children can go just about any place and everyone smiles (well most everyone) because they justare happy campers and the beauty of life shines rigtthrough them. Ofcourse there are those times when the throw their little fits and seem to others like the most spoild children,but thats when I say "exit,stage left..." Anyway, i thought you would get a hoot out of the Euriopian thing!
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Old 01-16-2003, 07:12 AM
  # 38 (permalink)  
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zoomer,

Now you believe me! Yes, blonde hair, blue eyes are European traits and always admired worldwide. Classifying race is something I want to refrain from but it is a fact of life.

I don't know if you are in Alanon or not but I found out race, racism is best overcomed by applying the the "Three C", I didn't cause it, I can't cure it and I can't control it, I just have to detach from the negative effects.

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Old 01-16-2003, 07:38 AM
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Hey ebony, I never ever thought to dismiss on the worlds veiw of race. I have no problem knowing that it's there,because it is! I see it everyday, fro TV programs,to books to people. OK, here goes what I feel. Not because I'm white,but because I beleive because that is what I ws taught. It's black history month this month right? When I was a kid we were taught the words of Dr. King. His most important speach begain "I have a dream". Well ebony, I have lived Dr. Kings dream and still do. I try and teach my kids the dream,but I cannot change the world, just what I can be in myself and to mychildren. I do not go overboard and say "just bcause I'm white I shoul be punished for all the harm caused to people of color from whites". The key word ebony is "punished"! I think it shouldstop and so did Dr. King. I feel that the differences should be embraced and respected no atter where a person lives. Ebony, my families words still echo in my head,but I know i's just an echo, not what I really feel and not the way I act. Maybe in many generation to come even the echos will be gone. I love he look ofevery child (well, some kids can be ugly), no matter what skin they are. I just love babies and compiment a mother on her baby no atte what color skin they are. Ebony, I was not trying to make a point or points, I'm just talking to you and what ever pops in m head. I like it that you have a strong voice and a good heart, and I do not disagree on anything you say,why should I whenit's true. Hey ebony,my name is Christie,I'm white,I'm learning disabled, I'm hearing emparid,I abused food,drink,and have tried drugs. Today, I'm strait,and no I'm not a junky,just full f sh=it sometimes I'm here on this forum because I was a hurting soul and I wanted to find people who can understand me. I try not to lie, ut I do do "whitelies" I do not steal,but if I can get away with getting a good deal on something I don't mind fudging the price, but nothing illigal! I'm ok! I'm not perfect,nor do I ever exspect to be,I just wan to be happy!
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Old 01-16-2003, 08:06 AM
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big huggs for ebony

ebony,I tought I was not making points by my writing, but the point I guess I was trying to mke with the oldladies at the mall isthat "I beleve that God is with me and shows me at times" I wanted to share m exsperiance of my faith with you in the story of the old ladies,not race. I also wanted to share our (you and me) comon denominator with the fact that we both grew up in LB California and it is and always will be a very different world form most places! Ebony, lets get this out of the way so we can be friends OK. Your a person of color or black or African American. I'm cacasion,white or europain decent. Those are facts of our skin color. You are discriminated against because of your skin color,it hurts you,it makes you pissed. I can valadate that you should be pissed and hurt. Iv been in the same situation. I want you toshare your hurt and pain because you let me share my pain with you. The only thing I would have a problem with is that you put me in the same catagory with therest of the "white people who are ass--holys " So tell your story Ebony and tell it with the strong voice God gave you and share your fear pan, happiness and just thoughts with me. I'm there, I will lition because you listioned to me! (((((((((((ebony)))))))))))))
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