Somewhere between Hell & the Hereafter?
 

I cannot even remember if I remembered to do my "Intro into The Fold".....For the past 2 weeks, my soul mate of 23 years has gone from "falling off the wagon, to down the street gutter and flushed out in the pipes.....I am trying to rationalize drinking 2 beers tonight. He is in the position to equally financially support the two of us. Now he has one very low paying part-time job....he comes home from work (where's he's been workin on a half pint of vodka) passes out till dark, instead of looking through the want ads (which he says he will every day but we all know he won't) He continues to borrow money from friends (which he DOES pay back) and goes out & buys more vodka until I feed him & then he passes out for the evening. This is Hell.......we've been here before
but never so financially desperate. WE both swore off AA 6 years ago or more; (I've been doin AA since age 15) I sit at this keyboard every night as an escape. I don't have to look across the table & watch him get plastered & then leave me alone to pass out. So, I don't sleep anymore...I haven't slept in days. I can't sleep w/ the smell of vodka everynight. I live in public housing, it's not like I can sleep on the couch. There's no room for a couch!
I'm so tired, so in love and want to die so badly.......What's the Hereafter like?