't was a fine morning.
I was at home alone one morning in March of last year. A little over a month after completing a residential treatment center program 250 miles away. I was still feeling more or less like a stranger among my family.
Prior to treatment, I had done an extended psychiatric ward gig. So I'd been gone a long time. Longer than the actual days, really...
Although I was sober since coming home, I was pretty much an empty shell. Confused and uncertain of where I had been, or where I was going.
I'd never had much use for the computer in my living room before. I googled the words sober and recovery.
The first result led me to the front door here. I started reading and clicking some of the links, and then noticed one that was called 'Forums', at the time.
So I knocked on the door and walked in.
That one can read the forums without registering was a blessing for me that morning.
I still harbored thoughts that the Internet was for weird people. But I clicked around the forums, and I read...
Talk about identifying...
Suddenly, I was overcome with a deep sense of connectedness to these people. I didn't know it at the time, but I had just found a home away from the rooms. Over the next year and a bit, I've been fortunate to develop friendships that will most likely last a lifetime.
I've laughed the good laugh, and I've cried the good tears here; I've been immensely grateful for sobriety, and I've also relapsed here. I've behaved with a serenity filled heart, and I've behaved with less than noble motives here. The one constant is that I've always been welcomed, no matter the time of day, drunk or sober, altruistic or possessed with ego.
When he said Glad you're here, I believed it then, as I believe it now.
How's it going today, you say?
It's a beautiful day.
Cheerios with peaches and milk, and then I'll see where the wind pushes me.