What did alcohol take from you?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2019
Posts: 7
Alcohol has taken SO much away from me, writing it down I feel INSANE to have gone back to drinking. As I posted in my intro post, I've recently relapsed and have been isolating at night drinking wine 4/5 nights per week, sometimes to blackout. I rationalize that it's because my mom recently died, or because I'm lonely with my kids at school, or because a 3 year relationship ended. I could go on and on but the point is NOTHING is ever made better under the influence. Thankfully I'm here now trying to get control over this pattern and haven't hurt anyone but myself YET. In the past I've hurt plenty.
In 2012 I got 2 DUI's and lost my license for 4 months and then had an interlock for 3 years. Humiliating for my children and I am SO lucky I didn't go to jail. Because this was during a divorce, my exH (rightly so) petitioned the court for custody and was granted 6 months of full custody and I had visitation after being a stay at home mom for years. Horrible.
I got so drunk at airports I wasn't allowed on flights. Missed a family event.
I've fallen down stairs, blacked out and said cruel things...I could go on and on and I know if I don't stop now ALL of these things or more will happen again. It doesn't get better. How is it that we can forget these horrible moments when we yearn for the very temporary relaxation alcohol brings?
In 2012 I got 2 DUI's and lost my license for 4 months and then had an interlock for 3 years. Humiliating for my children and I am SO lucky I didn't go to jail. Because this was during a divorce, my exH (rightly so) petitioned the court for custody and was granted 6 months of full custody and I had visitation after being a stay at home mom for years. Horrible.
I got so drunk at airports I wasn't allowed on flights. Missed a family event.
I've fallen down stairs, blacked out and said cruel things...I could go on and on and I know if I don't stop now ALL of these things or more will happen again. It doesn't get better. How is it that we can forget these horrible moments when we yearn for the very temporary relaxation alcohol brings?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2019
Posts: 3
Confidence
It took away my confidence and makes me feel worthless and it got worse over the years because of the guilt I felt from binging.
Kind of did the exact opposite of what I thought it was doing.
I have vowed that drinking is over for me.
I accept myself for who I am and accept my past.
Kind of did the exact opposite of what I thought it was doing.
I have vowed that drinking is over for me.
I accept myself for who I am and accept my past.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2019
Posts: 3
Originally Posted by Sober13 
Alcohol has taken SO much away from me, writing it down I feel INSANE to have gone back to drinking. As I posted in my intro post, I've recently relapsed and have been isolating at night drinking wine 4/5 nights per week, sometimes to blackout. I rationalize that it's because my mom recently died, or because I'm lonely with my kids at school, or because a 3 year relationship ended. I could go on and on but the point is NOTHING is ever made better under the influence. Thankfully I'm here now trying to get control over this pattern and haven't hurt anyone but myself YET. In the past I've hurt plenty.
In 2012 I got 2 DUI's and lost my license for 4 months and then had an interlock for 3 years. Humiliating for my children and I am SO lucky I didn't go to jail. Because this was during a divorce, my exH (rightly so) petitioned the court for custody and was granted 6 months of full custody and I had visitation after being a stay at home mom for years. Horrible.
I got so drunk at airports I wasn't allowed on flights. Missed a family event.
I've fallen down stairs, blacked out and said cruel things...I could go on and on and I know if I don't stop now ALL of these things or more will happen again. It doesn't get better. How is it that we can forget these horrible moments when we yearn for the very temporary relaxation alcohol brings?
In 2012 I got 2 DUI's and lost my license for 4 months and then had an interlock for 3 years. Humiliating for my children and I am SO lucky I didn't go to jail. Because this was during a divorce, my exH (rightly so) petitioned the court for custody and was granted 6 months of full custody and I had visitation after being a stay at home mom for years. Horrible.
I got so drunk at airports I wasn't allowed on flights. Missed a family event.
I've fallen down stairs, blacked out and said cruel things...I could go on and on and I know if I don't stop now ALL of these things or more will happen again. It doesn't get better. How is it that we can forget these horrible moments when we yearn for the very temporary relaxation alcohol brings?
Girl, it CAN and WILL only get better. You are 100% right - NOTHING good ever comes from alcohol and it never ever will. Everyday is a new day!! A chance to start over.... No matter how many times youve said youd stopped doesnt matter, aslong as you try again until you succeed!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2019
Posts: 122
It took away someone who I feel was the love of my life. It has robbed him of having the amazing life he could have had; the wife and kids he had always dreamt of (with or without me). I fear he still has a few more years of self destruction sadly.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 111
[QUOTE=rharman;7337799] When you stopped drinking , did it help your depression ? I stopped drinking three years ago and it has put me in a three year treatment resistant depression .
Originally Posted by Bullwinkle1944
________________________________________
bringmeback7693 writes >>>For me, alcohol took away my sense of self. Before alcohol I had passions and interests that I could have explored more, but alcohol made me forget about all of them.
I loved writing and art and theatre, but was always too hungover in college to pursue any of these activities. I stopped caring about them. Pretty soon my only hobby was drinking.
Alcohol also made my anxiety, depression, and social anxiety infinitely worse. It destroyed my confidence and self-worth.
What did alcohol take from you? How can you get it back?<<<
Alcoholic drinking, the drug alcohol temporally relieved my depression, depression I didn’t know I was suffering. If the effect from alcohol weren’t temporary, I wouldn’t have become addicted.
Before my first drink, I blocked my depression and feelings involved with my depression via hyper- activities, mostly sports. Since hyper-activities was a frame of reference, it’s easy in retrospect to see why alcohol went beyond what hyper-activities, in what it did for me. Depending on my mood and circumstances, I had good and bad times, but the good times became increasingly fewer, this is due to tolerance. One aspect of my problems at this point was I was attempting to recapture my original almost euphoric experiences at the beginning of my drinking. Eventually alcohol stopped working for me and that’s when I began to question whether I was an alcoholic.
Alcoholic drinking contributed to my divorce. On the other hand, Alcoholic drinking opened my eyes in realizing I had married a stranger, because I didn’t know who I was, so my choices in relationships were immature.
I view alcoholism as the cure for that of which it purports to be the disease. The symptom alcoholism, has a purpose, and that’s recovery from my emotional and mental problems.
Also for me, alcoholism is a delivery system into spiritual reality, which is the only
bringmeback7693 writes >>>For me, alcohol took away my sense of self. Before alcohol I had passions and interests that I could have explored more, but alcohol made me forget about all of them.
I loved writing and art and theatre, but was always too hungover in college to pursue any of these activities. I stopped caring about them. Pretty soon my only hobby was drinking.
Alcohol also made my anxiety, depression, and social anxiety infinitely worse. It destroyed my confidence and self-worth.
What did alcohol take from you? How can you get it back?<<<
Alcoholic drinking, the drug alcohol temporally relieved my depression, depression I didn’t know I was suffering. If the effect from alcohol weren’t temporary, I wouldn’t have become addicted.
Before my first drink, I blocked my depression and feelings involved with my depression via hyper- activities, mostly sports. Since hyper-activities was a frame of reference, it’s easy in retrospect to see why alcohol went beyond what hyper-activities, in what it did for me. Depending on my mood and circumstances, I had good and bad times, but the good times became increasingly fewer, this is due to tolerance. One aspect of my problems at this point was I was attempting to recapture my original almost euphoric experiences at the beginning of my drinking. Eventually alcohol stopped working for me and that’s when I began to question whether I was an alcoholic.
Alcoholic drinking contributed to my divorce. On the other hand, Alcoholic drinking opened my eyes in realizing I had married a stranger, because I didn’t know who I was, so my choices in relationships were immature.
I view alcoholism as the cure for that of which it purports to be the disease. The symptom alcoholism, has a purpose, and that’s recovery from my emotional and mental problems.
Also for me, alcoholism is a delivery system into spiritual reality, which is the only
Casual Hero and Raconteur
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Austin, TX, USA
Posts: 1,242
It helped...
[QUOTE=rharman;7337800]
When you stopped drinking , did it help your depression ? I stopped drinking three years ago and it has put me in a three year treatment resistant depression . I have carried a low-grade depression around with me the majority of my life. It wasn’t always enough to require treatment, but it interfered with my purpose and activities (and enjoyment thereof) and prevented me from being a fully-functional participant in my own life. I’m sure it contributed to my headlong adolescent rush into alcohol and drugs.
Staying sober helped, in that my depression was no longer the intrusive, controlling thing it had become, and I had a number of years of happy, hardworking, productive life. My career progressed at a satisfactory rate, I enjoyed some success in my chosen creative field, my friendships were solid and supportive, and I learned (often through hard lessons) how to be a committed partner in a romance which has endured for 23 years and counting.
However, while it is certainly better than self-destruction, sobriety is not a cure-all. My recent years have been marred by chronic pain due to catastrophic injuries suffered in an on-the-job accident, and chronic pain is virtually guaranteed to cause or exacerbate depression. I’ve had to seek treatment - something I did only sparingly (and under duress) prior to my accident - and with limited success.
Still, my current difficulties do not erase the happy years that precede them, and I firmly believe my sobriety is helping me cope with my disability, pain and, yes, even my depression.
If a suggestion is what you desire, I would suggest you stick with sobriety, and see if it can help you the way it helped me. The change may be subtle and slow in coming, but (in my experience) there will be change for the better!
I wish you well.
Bill J. from Austin
Originally Posted by rharman
When you stopped drinking , did it help your depression ? I stopped drinking three years ago and it has put me in a three year treatment resistant depression .
Staying sober helped, in that my depression was no longer the intrusive, controlling thing it had become, and I had a number of years of happy, hardworking, productive life. My career progressed at a satisfactory rate, I enjoyed some success in my chosen creative field, my friendships were solid and supportive, and I learned (often through hard lessons) how to be a committed partner in a romance which has endured for 23 years and counting.
However, while it is certainly better than self-destruction, sobriety is not a cure-all. My recent years have been marred by chronic pain due to catastrophic injuries suffered in an on-the-job accident, and chronic pain is virtually guaranteed to cause or exacerbate depression. I’ve had to seek treatment - something I did only sparingly (and under duress) prior to my accident - and with limited success.
Still, my current difficulties do not erase the happy years that precede them, and I firmly believe my sobriety is helping me cope with my disability, pain and, yes, even my depression.
If a suggestion is what you desire, I would suggest you stick with sobriety, and see if it can help you the way it helped me. The change may be subtle and slow in coming, but (in my experience) there will be change for the better!
I wish you well.
Bill J. from Austin
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Posts: 3
Alcohol has taken everything.
In truth alcohol has taken from me everything that I hold dear.
2 very special women, guardianship of my own daughter, a previous home, trust, responsibility and sanity. I abused the trust of several people and left it in tatters through booze.
Some of the trust and love I lost I can't get back, it's too late and that's been made clear to me, there's no way back. That's what hurts as much as staying sober
2 very special women, guardianship of my own daughter, a previous home, trust, responsibility and sanity. I abused the trust of several people and left it in tatters through booze.
Some of the trust and love I lost I can't get back, it's too late and that's been made clear to me, there's no way back. That's what hurts as much as staying sober
Member
Join Date: Feb 2020
Posts: 12
It has taken the person I might have been. I'll never know who that was now. She's still there somewhere in the darkness because I can hear her sometimes. Nevertheless, I'm going to try to be the best person I can be with what I still have - and I there may be good surprises along the way. If I drink, then the end will be slow and painful and that won't be a surprise at all (really don't want to work to get that!).
Member
Join Date: Feb 2020
Location: Lost In America
Posts: 12
Alcohol has taken everything that I need to be successful. It has taken my drive. It has taken my empathy and my ability to feel. It has left me as a shell of the person that I could be and want to be.
So glad the joy is back and the depression and doubt are mostly gone.
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