Redmayne

Since my recovery and sobriety began, following events of the 14/15th Feb., 2008,when my alcoholism was taken from me.

There have been two, in real terms, obvious benefits taken place, in that I now live in a safe, secure environment, when I arrived at my present location, it was my 5th home, in the previous 7 years, and I have a secure income that's guaranteed to last me the rest of my days.

If affluence is defined as having everything that you need, and not what you want. Then I'm affluent, a far cry from the days when the only thing that stood between me and sleeping in the gutter, was the front door of my sparsely furnished flat, formally occupied by prostitutes, situated above the local drug dealer, that no one else wanted.

I've also continued to enlarge my spiritual beliefs, particularly in my case by reading old eastern beliefs, everything from the 'Bahgavad Gita', Buddhism, Sun Tzu, plus other various, notable contemporary writers, Dan Millman's 'Peaceful Warrior ' series, Richard Bach's 'Johnathan Livingston Seagull' and Jean Giono, plus a few others.

During this time, I've gained a heightened sense of perspective, not least in my own ability to think cognitively (truth and reason), so that now, instead of living in a delusional alcoholic state, I look for credibility in all people, including myself and things.

No credibility, no me....whilst I try to practice those three great spiritual values, compassion, patience and tolerance towards others, enhanced with forgiveness. Learning to forgive myself, was one of the hardest things I've done!

I find great difficulty in directing any of this towards people, regardless of their race, class or gender,who in themselves at whatever level have no credibility, in the way they present themselves, i.e. it was apparent to me,struggling to gain sobriety, at A.A. meetings there were often people present whose problem was not alcohol or alcoholism,but for anything other, encompassing a variety of reasons and states of mind.

As much as I now find, in the wider community, perhaps as we live in a self absorbed, materialistic society, so those who specialize in social commentary tell us. There are many who make presumptions about others,'often plucked from thin air', that have no basis in reality. Often causing others pain or making them feel small, do that, and you will not only lose them, but you will never get them back....

'Live and let live', means exactly that! As much ass the suggestion that if you can't help someone, you shouldn't harm them, the very basis of Buddhist philosophy....

It then, with my heightened sense of perspective, puzzles me why I constantly come across, either directly or indirectly, people who for reasons, given that their own credibility is singularly lacking and their existence can be said. Not least as I suffered the horrors of 30 years of alcoholism, something which I'm sure many on here are familiar with. As having a fragile, reality, the only certain thing about life, is it's uncertainty, right.

Seem to see themselves qualified to constantly give me, totally unqualified advice about how to live my life, usually according to their needs and not mine??? Which in turn not only lacks credibility, but at best is superficial.

I love my sobriety, not least as it's brought me, in my heightened perspective, hitherto unknown, depths of knowledge, understanding, peace and serenity, both in myself and the world around me...