40 Days In
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 321
40 Days In
Hello,
My name is Steven and I am on my third, and hopefully last, go around in recovery. This time around I tend to feel the emotional impact of working the steps of NA, and I believe this is due to the fact that I came into the rooms with the desperation needed, as it says in the literature. I came to this forum because I have always had an affinity for forums, and the socializing found here. In my active disease this was the only way that I had a social life, partly due to geography and partly due to my desire to be alone, to have no one around me to make me feel guilty for what I was doing. I have several reasons for being here, the main one being I wish to have a place where it doesn't matter the time of day, or what day it is, I know that there is support here for me. I have a sponsor who has a sponsor, am a Christian with a daily contact with God, am working the steps, am currently on the 4th step, working them out of the flatbook, have an extensive support group and attend atleast a meeting a day. When I can't get to a meeting, as I can't now, I put forth the effort to gather recovering addicts around me and have a meeting of our own. My take on recovery is truly a day at a time. We are granted a daily reprieve, contingent on our spiritual condition, and it is my personal belief through experience that this requires daily maintenance. I put pen to paper, daily. I reach out to recovering addicts and alcoholics, daily. I do service work, daily. In the days where I make the conscience choice not to do these things I feel the impact of that choice, and generally it feels worse then the days where I put in the effort and the work. That is where I am today. My general purpose for being here, beyond finding support when I cannot get it from my support group, is so that maybe my experience, strength and hope can benefit another recovering person, and through that I can be uplifted, knowing that I helped another get just one more day free of their disease. My clean date is 4/21/12, and God willing and Steven willing it will stay that way.
My name is Steven and I am on my third, and hopefully last, go around in recovery. This time around I tend to feel the emotional impact of working the steps of NA, and I believe this is due to the fact that I came into the rooms with the desperation needed, as it says in the literature. I came to this forum because I have always had an affinity for forums, and the socializing found here. In my active disease this was the only way that I had a social life, partly due to geography and partly due to my desire to be alone, to have no one around me to make me feel guilty for what I was doing. I have several reasons for being here, the main one being I wish to have a place where it doesn't matter the time of day, or what day it is, I know that there is support here for me. I have a sponsor who has a sponsor, am a Christian with a daily contact with God, am working the steps, am currently on the 4th step, working them out of the flatbook, have an extensive support group and attend atleast a meeting a day. When I can't get to a meeting, as I can't now, I put forth the effort to gather recovering addicts around me and have a meeting of our own. My take on recovery is truly a day at a time. We are granted a daily reprieve, contingent on our spiritual condition, and it is my personal belief through experience that this requires daily maintenance. I put pen to paper, daily. I reach out to recovering addicts and alcoholics, daily. I do service work, daily. In the days where I make the conscience choice not to do these things I feel the impact of that choice, and generally it feels worse then the days where I put in the effort and the work. That is where I am today. My general purpose for being here, beyond finding support when I cannot get it from my support group, is so that maybe my experience, strength and hope can benefit another recovering person, and through that I can be uplifted, knowing that I helped another get just one more day free of their disease. My clean date is 4/21/12, and God willing and Steven willing it will stay that way.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,414
Welcome to SR Steven 
Thanks for sharing your story - you'll find a lot of support here
Feel free to explore the place - you might actually find more response in our Newcomers or Substance Abuse forums
D
Thanks for sharing your story - you'll find a lot of support here
Feel free to explore the place - you might actually find more response in our Newcomers or Substance Abuse forums
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 321
Well, I'm not sure what to say here... The basics are I chose to drink and use after six months, stayed out for a while. Experienced more homelessness, hopelessness, a few other bad things. The reason? I stopped doing what I was doing when I posted that post up above. And, more importantly, I chose to solve my emotional and mental state my using.
I can't say I have any deep words at this point, or really anything other then my story and what I am now doing, if and when someone needs to hear it. One thing I do want to say is that I am not the same person as I was last time I was here. I am changing slowly as the result of the work I am putting into my sobriety, but I am changing, and for this I am grateful.
I can't say I have any deep words at this point, or really anything other then my story and what I am now doing, if and when someone needs to hear it. One thing I do want to say is that I am not the same person as I was last time I was here. I am changing slowly as the result of the work I am putting into my sobriety, but I am changing, and for this I am grateful.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
