Doug

and I noticed something. Something painfully obvious, that has probably been said several times...

Alcoholism, substance abuse is not choosy. Male, female, young, middle age, old, employed, un-employed...I could go on and on.

I was noticing peoples birthdays, and it just caught my attention. Hell it doesn't even seem to care which path of recovery one tries, it just keeps on, keeping on.

So many folks in recovery, so many who have passed on, and I see by birthdays, that addiction doesn't change, it just grabs whos next, and it doesn't care, at all, who you are, what you know, what you think you know.

Its like cancer, its sole purpose is to destroy you, me...us....anybody.

And I feel for the newcomers, while they help me remember what it was like in the beginning, that memory scares the hell out of me for others.

There are about 17,000 people here, and most of us have the common thread of being struck, not touched, struck, smacked, throttled by addiction.

I know we all know this, I know this is all obvious, I just felt like saying.....something.

Ann

Good observation, Doug. When I hear people talking about addiction and someone says they're not going to a meeting because they're not like "those people" it takes all the self-control I have not to say "those people are EXACTLY like you...and me...and him...and her...and that guy over there.

Same for the codie side. When people say things like "I raised my children better than to do drugs" I hold myself back from saying "how you raised your children may have nothing to do with it". Instead I say a silent prayer that they never know the horror of addiction.

Hugs
Ann

Dan

Just got back from a meeting.
Couple dozen people, I guess.
A teenager, scared, with a court slip.
A young twenty something woman, very pregnant.
An old man in a wheelchair.
Black, asian, hispanic, caucasian...
Many faces and stories.

historyteach

I can totally understand your verb choice here!
And agree....it's hard....

But, we live each day as it is. Some are better than others, for sure.
We make choices along the way about our lives.

I guess that is as it should be...
Shalom!

Shalom!

Autumn

Hi Doug.

It is scary. I'm scared for the ones who never find recovery....

There are some who post on Newcomer's that just aren't ready. I worry and think about them every day.

I have attached to one of those posters, because this individual is really a beautiful person and struggling so hard. I feel for them all, but can only offer so much, as I'm just a babe in the woods with my own recovery and working really hard. I can't visit that forum often, because it would just hurt so bad to follow an active user's posts just to have them go *poof* and disappear.

They're in my heart and on my mind, as well as the countless souls whose names I will never know, that might not make it another day.

Scary and sad.....

Phinneas

Amen.

This disease is an equal opportunity destroyer. It does not discriminate.

Prayers to ALL who suffer.

(...)

Phinny

Gooch

Thanks Doug. your words absolutely opened up my tear ducts this morning..

either that or I've grown allergic to Clarence.

Time2Surrender

And then there are the one's who have died as a result of this disease.I am grateful to have been given another chance.

Luckyv2

Yes I have observed just like everyone else that this dis-ease don't give a damn about anyone, or anything....It will use whatever or whoever it can to take each of us back out...I know that I have no handle on this disease that it handles me, but with the Programs, My Higher Power (whom I choose to call Master), Twelve Step, Fellowship, we can do this one day at a time....We also have to be aware of that none of us are exempt to be that newcomer again that this is infact one of the most deadly diseases around. Thanks for the post Doug.....Love what you say

Love Vic

Hopefloats

Thank you Doug. Funny thing, I always knew about addiction, and of course I had compassion. But now I have it here..(As Hope points to her heart)

I hope maybe I can heat my home with candles..I have so many lit it seems...
((hugs))
Hopefloats

angelgirl

Hi all,

It's so true..
Addiction just doesn't care who you are..
I have dreamed many different times of winning the lottery, and one day, I was dreaming of winning, and thinking about how I'd spend the money, and suddenly it hit me,, doesn't matter if I won the lottery, addiction is still there,, money wouldn't do anything, EXCEPT make drugs EVEN more accessable to me.. It was a moment of clarity for me.. Nothing will take it away, ever, I CAN put the disease into remission, but it will always be there..

Also remindee me of the different treatment centers I have been in, and WOW, what a wide spectrum of people one sees while in treatment, and any addiction type setting (mmetings) but we had a 42 year old Million Air, all the way to a homeless person there, at one particular treatment.. It's something I believe people have to go through in the beginning as a part of accepting the disease, is the accepting the fact that I AM just like the rest of them.. I think many struggle with that, I knwo I did, in the beginning,, and I had been brought down so low at a point that I WAS that person that people were saying I am not like her... What a different range I went through in my life,,, I bet most others did as well...

Thanks Doug for reminding us,,

Love,
Becky

roadie58

I agree that this damned disease doens't care who you are or how much money you have, what car you drive, what color your parents are, etc.

It amazes me sometimes at meetings. I was at one where I had 6 months, and the two guys right next to me were 9 months each. I'm an old hippie, there was a young black kid on one side and a gay friend of mine on the other. In normal life, the three of us would never be friends and share our stories.

I prefer to think of the diversity as a TALENTED POOL OF PEOPLE, recognizing each individuals' strengths instead of our common weakness.

Chy

I don't think I'll ever get used to it either.

Doug

I recall a meeting once where I sat there was a man about 20 years older than me, and another about 20 years younger than me. And for all the generation "gaps" that night, at that table, there were these two common threads. Addiction, and recovery.

The more things change, the more they stay the same....maybe....

Dan

It's what a buddy in my old home group called our markers. Meaning we all shared things in common that could only be detected by others like us, maybe.
Like a newb, reduced to tears in a meeting when he finally faces his reality, and the oldtimer in the same meeting, two or three shares later, breaking down himself, all of twenty five years sober, still being overwhelmed by life at times.

Don W

Doug, Great point. it's one thing in my life that has neither a heart or compassion. It will not fogive and forget any straying into it's web of evil. About the most perfect of it's accomplishments, is to have learned every single weakness, every single button I have, and without a thought play or push each and everyone to destroy me and all who dare to get close to me. You can search and search for the scariest of costumes for Halloween. Until they come up with a costume for alcohol/addiction the most scary of masks have yet to be seen. The Grim Reaper and Freddie, would run in fear.