Changing the things we Can
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Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Philadelphia, PA
Posts: 1,742
Changing the things we Can
This morning I intended to wake up early and hit the gym.
There's a new coach at the pool who's taken over the position from the previous swim coach who I adored.
I've been resistant checking out the new coach's style. My old coach was a woman. The new coach is a man. Gender has something to do with my resistance.
This morning I was very aware of the negative self-talk and grumblings as I got up and grabbed my swim bag. I decided to take the easier, softer way. I decided not to go.
Back in 2013, one small change changed my life forever: back in 2013, I decided to go to this same morning swim practice for the first time.
At this group practice I met several people, one of whom, the coach, is also a therapist.
At her suggestion, I decided to try counseling for a secret involving an old coach which I'd held onto for many years. From counseling I admitted my powerlessness over alcohol, and from there, I attended my first AA meeting. From my first AA meeting, I began healing work.
What I'm getting at is this, one small change can change your life.
In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, there's an often-quoted line about contempt prior to investigation. This is equivalent to resistance to change the things we can and the wisdom to know.
I'm very aware of my resistance to the idea of taking direction from a new male coach. 'Changing the things I can' means walking through resistance with an a open mind. I also need to bring compassion towards myself when this walk seems more than I can take.
There's an inspiration card available at some AA meetings called, simply, "the green card." On it are paragraphs all starting with the words: Just for today....
One of the paragraphs reads, in part "Just for today...I will do at least two things I don't want to do--just for exercise...."
What two things have you done lately that you didn't want to do? Was there a positive outcome as a result?
There's a new coach at the pool who's taken over the position from the previous swim coach who I adored.
I've been resistant checking out the new coach's style. My old coach was a woman. The new coach is a man. Gender has something to do with my resistance.
This morning I was very aware of the negative self-talk and grumblings as I got up and grabbed my swim bag. I decided to take the easier, softer way. I decided not to go.
Back in 2013, one small change changed my life forever: back in 2013, I decided to go to this same morning swim practice for the first time.
At this group practice I met several people, one of whom, the coach, is also a therapist.
At her suggestion, I decided to try counseling for a secret involving an old coach which I'd held onto for many years. From counseling I admitted my powerlessness over alcohol, and from there, I attended my first AA meeting. From my first AA meeting, I began healing work.
What I'm getting at is this, one small change can change your life.
In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, there's an often-quoted line about contempt prior to investigation. This is equivalent to resistance to change the things we can and the wisdom to know.
I'm very aware of my resistance to the idea of taking direction from a new male coach. 'Changing the things I can' means walking through resistance with an a open mind. I also need to bring compassion towards myself when this walk seems more than I can take.
There's an inspiration card available at some AA meetings called, simply, "the green card." On it are paragraphs all starting with the words: Just for today....
One of the paragraphs reads, in part "Just for today...I will do at least two things I don't want to do--just for exercise...."
What two things have you done lately that you didn't want to do? Was there a positive outcome as a result?
Redmayne
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Manchester, England, UK.
Posts: 1,543
In appreciation...
In appreciation of an excellent and constructive post and as someone who now sees himself as a self directed student of the practices and principles of Stoic philosophy I offer this...
'Man is not disturbed by things but his view of things' - Epictetus
by which he was simply saying we , in any situation must decide what is and isn't under our control,
Not under our control -our family, friends, the weather, the economy, our bodies, although we can diet and exercise they still age, etc.etc.
Under our control - our opinions, judgements and perceptions
On which basis we must decide 'what's up to us', which you did...
'Man is not disturbed by things but his view of things' - Epictetus
by which he was simply saying we , in any situation must decide what is and isn't under our control,
Not under our control -our family, friends, the weather, the economy, our bodies, although we can diet and exercise they still age, etc.etc.
Under our control - our opinions, judgements and perceptions
On which basis we must decide 'what's up to us', which you did...
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