changes
 

Recovering from a hopeless state and mind and body is more than putting the cork in the bottle .

In my case looking back I put the cork in the bottle and became an Ex Drunk I stayed that way for quite a while and my interpretation of recovery or '' getting better '' was based on purely material gain ,I viewed sobriety with having more money, nice clothes ,nice car ,nice home , holidays abroad , to the outside world I appeared to be a changed man and all for the better .

Looking back I was really what is termed '' a Dry Drunk '' my material gain was based on dis-honesty ,I lied cheated stole and used any underhand method to achieve my aim.

AA talks about honesty , I was honest about my drinking and nothing else so I rationalized and justified my actions , funnily enough I only befriended like minded people and kept well away from the people who mentioned the steps or higher power , mind you in Glasgow Scotland at that time there were not a lot of people who spoke about the steps and a higher power in 1975 .

For twenty years I existed on staying away from the 1st drink and that was all , nothing much else ,deep down I was miserable and unhappy and very discontent .

The inevitable happened the 20 years felt like I had walked out of a drinking establishment in 1975 and walked round a corner into another one in 1995 and carried on where I had left off .

I carried on drinking on and off until 2006 ,that's when I threw in the towel and admitted defeat that I was powerless over alcohol and my life was unmanageable .

That was my turning point , honesty with myself ,I now know that it is impossible to stay stopped and be content and at peace with oneself if you act and behave and think the exact same way that I did whilst drinking .

A hopeless state of mind and body with grave emotional and mental disorders , looking back I strongly identify with that and I knew I had to clear away the wreckage of the past .

A recipe for living ,a new way of life towards the road of '' happy destiny '' I was one of those poor unfortunates who suffered with grave emotional and mental disorders , and do you know what ? I had the capacity to be honest and I have recovered .

Sobriety is a state of mind and in no way is it a sacrifice .

Stevie

hi Stevie,
great to see you here.
yeah, definitely i had to change "the rest of it" and not just stop drinking.
in progress.
i know you from the LR forum; mkh, but most people don't use real names here, so i don't:)

Hi Fini.

Great to meet up with you here ,yes many tried to hold on to their old ideas and the result was nil , yep says it all .

Take care .
Stevie x

A Disease of Perception...
 

Thanks for this educating, illuminating and informative post, so great it's a pleasure to respond to it!

It's said that alcoholism, which comprises, as I'm sure you know , of a mental obsession and a physical allergy, as opposed to addiction, to anything, being purely a mental obsession.

Is a Disease of Perception, not least because it's the only illness/disease that'll tell you, you haven't got it whilst at the same time killing you!

The obvious symptom then, common to both alcoholism, which is a disease/illness as opposed to an addiction to alcohol, is the problem is centered in the mental obsession which exists in the mind...or if you wish, the individuals sufferer's state of mind.

Personally speaking, I've found, in keeping with the suggested 12 Step program of recovery, given I suffer from alcoholism, my burgeoning interest in Stoic philosophy ( see the Stoicism Today website), which is linked to 'The Serenity Prayer' and forms the basis of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, of great assistance in progressing my recovery. In accord with those things you've referred to in your thread...examples of which might be,

'Man is not disturbed by things but his view (perception) of things' - Epictetus, along with Seneca and Marcus Aurelius, one of the great Stoic philosophers.

'What happened to you may not be your fault but it is your responsibility to think about it,' - William Knauss, one of the pioneers of Cognitive Behaviour.

No one comes into your life without their being there for a reason. Thanks for showing up! :scoregood

Great post and so true. If we don't change we are condemned to stay the same. Recovery is about so much more than not drinking

Hi Redmayne , nice to hear from you , Joe McQ was a big influence on my recovery I liked his Joe and Charlie compilations , another guy Eckhart Tolle was also a big help do not know if you have read ''The Power of Now ''? the only thing we have is the 'Now ' and if you reverse the letters it reads Won odaat .
Regards Stevie.

Charlie and Joe...
 

Charlie and Joe played a huge part in my recovery, after a guy called Brian. Handed my a copy of a recording of one of their,'Charlie & Joe's Big Book Study Meetings'. As he remarked at the time,'It's as good as having your own sponsor,' couldn't have said it better myself.

I'm not familiar with Tolle, however the ideas of living in the moment sounds similar to Buddhist philosophy, which I am reasonably knowledgeable of. That said, I'll take a look.

May I , in return suggest you reading, Soko Morinaga's book,'Novice to Master - An Ongoing Lesson in The Extent of My Own Stupidity,' the second part of the title being a pretty apt description of me!

With special reference to the chapter,'To Die While Alive,' which contains this verse from Shido Bunan Zenjii, a former drunk who became a much revered Zen Master ...

' Die while alive,

Thoroughly die.

Then just do as you will,

And all will be well.'

Hi Redmayne.

I have a lot of time and respect for buddhist teachings and methods , I have not read the book you mention ,I might make enquiries it is good to have an open mind towards enlightenment .

A favorite of mine is Autobiography of a Yogi by Parhamansa Yogananda . it is about ''self realisation '' he started a fellowship in the USA in the 70s I think , I was a member for couple of years and they used to send me lessons on a monthly basis .

I also at one time got interested in Kundalini Yoga It is more about the breathing techniques than the postures , opening the '' chakra's '' I am quite interested in ''Esoteric '' methods I used to go to meditation classes which involved deep breathing and learning to sit and direct the breathing to different parts of the body , it was very difficult to achieve but very worthwhile .

Norman Vincent Peale 's book '' Power of Positive Thinking '' I also found it quite helpful it was one of the forerunners of that subject .

My method for want of a better word is taken from all different faiths and beliefs , every religion you can think of believes in a Power greater than themselves and hey all have different names for that power , it is their ''own understanding ''.

I consider myself a '' recovering catholic '' today I have no time for organized religion , my early childhood was marred by '' fanatical Priests and Nuns and Maris Brothers '' they brainwashed through a god of fear of the terrors of an everlasting hell , if a baby died they were not allowed into heaven unless they had been baptized .

My parents were of mixed religions and these people were venomous against other faiths , protestants and muslims etc were according to them '' the lowest form of human being and would never enter heaven , very very sick and twisted people , this is all true it was early 1950s .

I also read a lot of the bible and my interpretation of '' higher power '' comes from a passage in the New Testament , Jesus was asked '' will I be beside you in the kingdom of heaven ? '' and '' Jesus said the Kingdom of Heaven is Within ''

That is how I believe in a higher power , the still quiet voice within , some may say you conscience ? does not matter , I would never had been able to go through the steps if I had not took this view .

Obviously over the years I have had to '' Unlearn '' what had been installed in me from an early age , suppose that is why I don't have any time for religion , spirituality is more to my liking AA is a spiritual programme , not a religious programme although sadly in some areas it is becoming more a religious programme or should I say christian programme , that is not right it was never intended to be that way , their are meetings were they mention Jesus Christ as the higher power and some meetings finish with the '' Lords Prayer , how can that be when it goes against the Preamble ? AA is not allied with any sect , organization or institution , does not endorse or oppose any causes .

That is why many disgruntled ex members say it is a '' religious cult '' I know some will say '' you must keep an open mind '' yet they carry on doing these practises .

It all boils down to '' the message that was carried '' you do not get two chances of a first impression and I have yet to meet any new member who entered he doors of AA '' with an open mind ''.

Anyway thats how I work AA and how I see what goes on round about me , take care and best wishes .

Stevie.

Smartest Guy I Know in AA says: If nothing changes than nothing changes.. LOL! (talk about keeping it simple)

still it does not change the Fact that it is SOOOO True!

There's little I can do ...
 

In support of all that's been said on this thread to date I'd add that there's little I can do about external events, that play a part in all our lives, drunk or sober.

Alternatively, there's a lot I can do about internal events e.g. my state of mind involving my perception of myself and the world around me to bring about the changes necessary to enable me to live a peaceful, sober, happy existence.

As the problem, whether you're one of those addicted to alcohol or you suffer from the illness/disease of alcoholism, centers in the mind. The obvious place to bring about those changes lies therein.

Supported by Marcus Aurelius in his book,'Meditations' saying,

' If you are distressed by anything external the pain is not due to the thing itself but your estimate of it and this you have the power to evoke at any moment.'

Change your perception, change your life!

Of all the people that I know the one that has caused me the biggest problems is ''myself '' We must be rid or die to self .

Regards
Stevie

Good stuff and warning labels, thank you.

I hear and am witness to some sober horse thieves. It's a good reminder that if I am not doing what I am suppose to do I may join others in the not OK corral!!

That was helpful. I have a sense that I have great dry drunk potential and it's something I'm eager to nip in the bud.

I'm originally from your neck of the woods, just a bit further down the Clyde and making my yearly trips back home is a friggin nightmare for my sobriety.

Hi Midton.

You say you think you have a great dry drunk potential and you need to nip it in the bud , well if you are really serious then '' you need to be willing to go to any length'' and you will be able to ''pull it out at the root '' because '' selfishness is the root cause of our problem '' .

Regards Stevie.

Choices .
 

It is a good choice if we learn to cultivate gratitude , it is very difficult to be miserable and grateful at the same time .