Mountainmanbob

After barely missing death and prison on my last two relapses with the liquid devil seven years ago and at the age of sixty three now, I'm thinking that there are PROBABLY NO MORE CHANCES AT REVOVERY FOR THE MOUNTAINMAN.

I have had a lot of close calls in life caused by my excessive drinking mixed with other BAD habits. Been in the courts and put on probation more times than I can remember. Broken relationships - more than I can remember. Troubles with persons, places and things - more than I can remember.

Many of the ones that I have known never got this many chances at Recovery.
Just a few that come to mind on this early morning.
One high school friend - died in his sleep at the age of 20.
Two recently in AA that I know went back out - both dead at the age of 50.
Old friend in AA went back out - took his life while drunk.

Bottom line
This just may well be, our last chance at being and staying sober.
Why are we sober and others not ?
Something to be very grateful for.
And not to be taken for granted today .... been there, done that.

MountainmanBob

SoberLeigh

Thanks, Mountainman; great post.

(The future is impossible to predict. All I know is I don't want to blow this chance I have been given to live a sober life; I absolutely love it.)

Redmayne

As someone who fell foul of alcoholism in his early 30's, when it both made, in my drinking and its grip on me.

I spent a further 30 years, recognising that despite my not giving it permission to even exist, accepting it and making repeated, eventually, uncompromising, determined efforts to get into recovery.

The end result being on the night of the 14/15th Feb., 2008, alone and unaided, so debilitated by alcohol, that I could only crawl, like a snake to my bed. My desire to drink alcohol was removed from me by my having a 'spiritual or psychic' experience (see the book 'Alcoholics Anonymous') something which I have to believe. There being no other explanation forthcoming.

The proof of its existence and mine, being that I'm alive today...

I was then 61 years old, am now 68 and safe, sane (jurys still out on that one' and sober...

During those 30 years, I pursued 3 professional careers and was moderately successful in each, more importantly I lost everything, and I do mean EVERYTHING!!! Not once, but twice other than my son and my ability, drunk or sober...

I also learned to change, sometimes just to survive! My perspective on many things, including myself, other people and life generally.. so for me there is no age limit on getting into recovery and hopefully prolonged sobriety. It just doesn't exist.

Two moments hat I take great comfort from, are that I was sober at my late mothers passing in 2009 and still sober at my grandson's birth, in the same month a year later.

You should remember that we deal with alcohol, cunning baffling, powerful and it belies us all in SRC to be ever vigilant, but you should never trick yourself that it is beyond yours or anyone else's ability to get into recovery, ever!

Mountainmanbob

yes it is cunning baffling and powerful coming to this site often sure helps to remind me of that very grateful signed by Bob

silentrun

I always felt like this chance was my one and only.

Newpathway

I am often amazed at the lifetime drinkers whose minds are still sharp and seemingly unaffected. I see some of you write very articulately here. I have known some family members who lived long lives (could have been longer without the booze) and had very prosperous lives. It's really quite amazing how people can fully recover.

Redmayne

A report on one of the national news channels here in the UK reported that, alarmingly, in the past 5 years there has been a 62% increase in people aged 65 or over being treated for alcoholism or alcohol abuse! Adding that there are growing concerns amongst health professionals about the 'hidden side' of drinking, mainly of older people often suffering from bereavement, loss of partners or loneliness.

As I got sober, aged 61 years after 30 years battling with my alcohol, as far as I'm concerned without wishing either to boast or wish harm to anyone else. I consider that my greatest life achievement...

Perhaps helped by the fact I've been single many, many years and I try to keep my mind active. In my case taking a strong interest in Buddhist philosophy/psychology. Same thing really ...it's all in the mind.

My latest venture turning towards Zen,which requires, Great Faith, Great Courage and Great Questioning, no time for loneliness or alcohol!

Oh yeah, one of the first things I did when I got sober was to undertake a university course, not to obtain anything, just to see if I could produce extended writing....that was a good idea.

Mountainmanbob

definitely also high on my list

MM

desypete

good post bob i to believe i have no more chances of coming back again, i only wish i had entered aa and learned all i have learned about me when i was just 16 years of age and started my drunken ways

i could of avoided so much pain and suffering not only to myself but to all my loved ones and people i had hurt over all the years

i can not do anything now about the past and all those wasted years, i can only try to make sure they never happen again,

i have no doubts at all if i drink again i will never come back as it took me down far enough last time and i will just carry on from were i left off

Soberwolf

I got sober just after turning 31 i am now 32 i didnt ever think i could get sober i always say it took me 3 months as from the moment i said i was alcoholic thats how long it took me to get sober longer than 18 days (my pb in the 3 months) im now 501 days and ive seen how destructive heartbreaking insane alcoholism really is im so glad i got sober didnt think it possible but somehow im here

Thanks for the thread MM

Boleo

IMO those of us who stay sober start out with a different type of GOD:

Gift
Of
Desperation

CAPTAINZING2000

Page 85 from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous

It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities. "How can I best serve Thee - Thy will (not mine) be done." These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.

Much has already been said about receiving strength, inspiration, and direction from Him who has all knowledge and power. If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. To some extent we have become God-conscious. We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense. But we must go further and that means more action.

Mountainmanbob

once knowing what we have been saved from why would we ever wish to return to dance with the liquid devil
Mountainmanbob

aasharon90

If I ever loosen the reigns of my recovery
program and A Faith in the Man that guides
me each day, then surely I would loose
control and as I know, there is no guarantee
I would be around to tell you about it.

Each time I read about someone returning
to the drink or drug and why they did, more
than like it is because they either stopped
going to meetings, stop living their recovery
program, cut ties with Faith and Hope and
the willingness to stay committed and strong
in recovery.

If I don't remain sober then I loose EVERYTHING.

At almost 56 yrs old, I certainly don't don't
want to play Russian roulette with my life.
My prayer and hope is that I leave this world
SOBER.

GracieLou

I heard many times "I have another drunk in me but I don't have another recovery in me" and that is exactly how I feel about it.

If I fell again I just do not see myself making it back. Last time it took me ten years. I am not getting any younger. I didn't have that decade to waste but I didn't know that at the time. Today, I know it and I feel it.

Redmayne

I like this thread if for no more than it points out the vicissitudes of aging, perhaps better evidenced in the suggestion that for all of us, everyone. We reach a point, usually in the mid 50's where life starts taking away from us those things it once so freely gave us.

Which are often evidenced in our physical and mental abilities and powers of recovery in just about anything affected by them. Which logically includes recovery from alcoholism, suggesting that anyone who having gained sobriety and is tempted to return to their former drinking habits is at least at risk of never, once again, recovering from them, if at all.

I was 61 when my desire to drink was removed from me, accepting that I will always suffer from my inherent alcoholism, now 68. I also think that whoever said,'Growing old is like being found guilty of a crime you didn't commit.' A remark which is once again tempered by the vicissitudes of aging.

None of which is said in a negative fashion, more of a simple statement of acceptance along the lines of the fact that you shouldn't regret growing old, it's a privilege denied to many.

Which includes all those who for whatever reason, have never or will never recover at whatever age, no matter if they think they're to old for another chance at recovery or not.

A fate that may befall us all, if we don't grasp the opportunity for recovery, hopefully followed by life long sobriety, whatever the vicissitudes of aging, good or bad, bring to us all. There's always something positive to be found in all our states of mind, at whatever age...just got to keep it,'bright eyed and bushy tailed.'

Which is part of what recovery is all about, along with the many other gifts it brings us, and no one can tell me, you have to look to far for them.

For me, waking up safe, sane and sober everyday, proves the truth of that statement.

Mountainmanbob

that was a great post Redmayne and covered a lot of things that my wife and I talked about earlier this evening. As a retired doctor, elder in our church often states, "growing old is not for sissies." I like to say, "that life is enough of a challenge without adding booze to it."

Mountainman

Redmayne

I'd certainly agree with the comments and observations of your friend that, 'growing old, ain't for sissies' adding that for me the phrase taken from Sun Tzu's famous book, 'The Art of War', which is about life itself really, although he did live in violent times, that,

'You must control events, otherwise events will control you,'

Accepting that obviously there's nothing I can or anyone else can do to control or delay the aging process, like many other things in our lives it's governed by our state of mind. Which does allow me not just to drink alcohol, but to even entertain thoughts of drinking it or wonder how I'd o on if I did. Through experience I already know the answer to that.

And as insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over again when you keep ending up with the same result. That only enhances the motivation not to do it or ponder on my chances of recovery if I did.

genesuu

My first love and best friend did not get the chance to grow old. He died right before turning 30. Please don't waste the chance. It's not a pretty death and, worse, it's a very ugly, painful life.

littlefish

I too feel that way. My drinking career was slow to start and I hit chronic around 50 and didn't get sober until my late 50's. I absolutely believe that if I took the risk of taking a drink, I doubt if I would make it back.

I would probably tell myself whats the point, "I'm so old anyway". I think that is what one of my brothers decided and believe me, the death of an elderly, chronic alcoholic with health problems is not pretty. He lost the battle with the bottle in his late 60's after an on-off recovery.