Crissaay

I'm not good with words. Mine are never encouraging. If anything my words are like knives.

How do you help you significant other during recovery? What are some suggestions? And what NOT to say. Becuz I like to play the blame game a lot!

Boleo

Have you tried posting in the "Friends and Family" forum?

Have you attended any Al-Anon meetings?

soberfish417

I have been in your shoes Crissaay. When someone you care about is hurting themselves its a really hard thing to take. We automaticly think "they could be doing better, their not trying hard enough" because we want them to do better right now. If theres something all people like its instant gratifacation, me being a addict and a alcoholic im the best at it! lol The best thing you can do for yourself and your loved one is to work on you, you cannot change them and they have to learn by themselves. I know this is hard to watch but its just the way things are. Go to a alanon meeting or a naraanon meeting. They are people that are in your shoes and have been where you have been. Being able to relate to someone is what helps us in our recovery, addict or loved one of a addict it does not matter because you are both in need of recovery. By you taking your own inventory and inproving yourself it will help them see that they need change also. Plus bettering yourself is always a good thing! Stay strong and when you get to that point where your going to loose it walk away, calm down and think to yourself " can i handle this situation in a better way? Am I thinking of myself only right now? Is what i say going to help this situation?" I hope this helps and feel free to message me if you have any other problems.