newby1961

Everyone has had to walk through some pretty heavy minefields name some and tell us how you did it?



"Seek sobriety, Find Serenity" by
Rabbi Doctor Abraham Twersky

Life Without Fear

Fear is an element of all chemical dependencies.

The fear is not panic or agoraphobia, but a terror that has been described as follows by a recovering person: "Ever since I was a kid I felt I was walking through a minefield."

When we walk through a minefield, we are aware that the next step may blow us to bits. If the next step is survived, it may be the one after that. There is no relief, because minefields are everywhere: at home, or at work, when alone or with friends. The only respite is a chemical, for the brief period of its action.

But these minefields exist only in our imagination. They are as unreal as other hallucinations. This is the insanity to which the program refers- the insanity of believing there are mines where none exist.

Some psychologists help a person walk safely through the minefield. The Twelve Step program helps a person realize that the minefields do not exist.

The promise of recovery is serenity instead of fear. Gradually the mines disappear, and we can direct our efforts to dealing with the challenges of the real world that do exist. With recovery we gain the wisdom to know the difference.

Rusty Zipper

hey newb,

my minefield was my reaction to life,

and the abyss of alcoholism

Ka-Boom!

i surrendered 100% to king alcohol,

and to king baby pattee.

grateful for the day i said hi, i'm Zip, i'm an alky

then followed directions.

grateful for the belief in somthing greater then me, rigorous honesty,

and freely giving

cl3an2day

I walked hand in hand with my toxic shame for my entire life, never understanding it or even identifying it

my toxic shame ruled my emotions, all i knew best of how to survive was to drown myself in drugs, dysfunctional behaviour and chaos

as long as i distracted my mind i didnt need to face my true inner feelings

that is my mindfield

recovery has given me the strength to face this shame and to start believing that I am a good person, sure I have done bad things but that does not make me a bad person

recovery is a beautiful thing

Mida

Despite the external successes in my life both personally and professionally, I've always felt not good enough and out of place. So when something bad would inevitably happen, (disappointment at work, fight with hubby, falling out with a friend, etc...) I would attribute it to them figuring out I indeed wasn't good enough and my fears were confirmed. So I would run away (quit the job, quit the friend) and, of course, drink. One of my biggest tasks in sobriety is believing in my personal worth and seeing these events for what they are...life.

Not sure I answered the original question lol...good topic

Boleo

[QUOTE=newby1961;2952752
Some psychologists help a person walk safely through the minefield. The Twelve Step program helps a person realize that the minefields do not exist.

[/QUOTE]

Using step one makes it an "End of Drinking" program.

Using all twelve steps makes it an "End of Suffering" program.

cl3an2day

oh how i relate to this Mida - thanks for sharing

a book that i am reading right now is making me challenge the way I think, it is called The Voice of Knowledge by Don Miguel Ruiz....simply mind blowing

the following is my favourite passage that talks about that voice in your head:

“I call it "the voice of knowledge" because it's telling you everything you know. It's always trying to make sense out of everything. That voice is always there. It never stops. It's not even real, but you hear it. You can say, "Well, it's me. I'm the one who is talking." But if you are the voice that is talking, then who is listening?

The voice of knowledge can also be called the liar who lives in your head. The liar speaks in your language, but your spirit, the truth, has no language. You just know truth; you feel it. The voice of your spirit tries to come out, but the voice of the liar is stronger and louder and it hooks your attention almost all of the time. You hear the voice, and what is it telling you? "Look at you. Who do you think you are? You will never make it. You aren't smart enough. Why should I try? Nobody understands me. How can I be happy when millions of people are dying of starvation?"

That voice is usually lying because it's the voice of what you have learned, and you have learned so many lies, mainly about yourself. The voice of knowledge can come from your own head, or it can come from people around you, but your emotional reaction to that voice is telling you, "I'm being abused." Every time we judge ourselves, find ourselves guilty, and punish ourselves, it's because the voice in our head is telling us lies. Every time we have a conflict with our parents, our children, or our beloved, it's because we believe in lies, and they believe in them, too.”

peace & love

Maryjan

Wow, all this is really hitting home for me. I am only 70 days sober, but the voice is still very loud. I'm so tired of it.

Boleo

At about one year sober I got a job as an Over The Road truck driver. The first two months were a living hell. Everything that could go wrong did go wrong. I did not get home for 2 months. I did not get to a recovery meeting for 9 weeks. I was fined almost as much as I earned. I spent many nights on on-ramps, dirt roads and factory parking lots. It was so lonely, boring and frightening that it made my homeless days look good.

The one good thing that came of it. I did learn how to meditate as a result of my lab-rat existence. I now understand the old Buddhist saying:

"In this life pain is mandatory - suffering is optional".