Recovery to me is.....

Realizing that it is none of my business what others think of me, that my value is mine alone.

Motives, keeping them on track.

Regarding each day as a blessing, and thanking God for them.

Living life to MY full potential not someone elses.

Always help someone if you can.

Almost forgot, dont drink or drug. That is a very small part of my recovery today.

i do have a sponsor, jsut got one last month, but she doesnt seem available most of the time, i have read some of the big book, got throgh the chapter of the agnostic, which to me is saying there should be no such thing as an "agnostic" that you MUST believe in some kind of higher power, which i do, i jsut dont know why if there is WHY i've gone through all of this hell
i do have faith, faith that SOME day i will be restored to sanity, i feel so messed up right now that it is hard to have hope, but i am trying
crys

https://www.geronimos.com/Store/secu...oducts/669.GIF

:rotfxko

???

Recovery is a very specific thing-- the psychic change brought about by working the 12 steps with a sponsor. It's not a result of making meetings, making coffee, emptying ashtrays.

If you are an alcoholic as described in the Big Book-- in a completely hopeless state-- you will not recover by "not drinking and going to meetings" alone.

This program is not mysterious. It's very clear. Do the work in our text book.

Recovery for me is to live my life without alcohol or the temptation to drink alcohol. At this point the 12 steps aren't part of my equation.

The one thing I think is good about the 12 steps is that it helps people work on themselves. I believe life is a journey for alcoholics and non-alcoholics. Life is a great big classroom, but many people just coast. Alcoholics (in recovery), don't have that luxury. Whether you use the 12 steps or work on yourself in other way, it is a journey we are all supposed to take:-)

Thanks for your honesty, but please understand that Alcoholics Anonymous is about the 12 steps. When we suggest to the newcomer that they can stay sober without the 12 steps, we are talking about a different program. I'm not sure what it is called.

In the early days of AA, most people were taken through the 12 steps before they were even brought to a meeting. Bill Wilson said that the sole purpose of an AA meeting is the practice and sharing of the 12 steps. The first 164 pages of the Big Book are dedicated to them. The book is written to explain "precisely how we recovered."

The steps are not like the 10 Commandments-- to be reviewed and read and considered. They are an experience vital to the psychic change that the chronic, relapsing alcoholic requires to live.

Follow your path, but let's all at least agree as to what AA is-- as designed and created by our founders-- and what it is not.

Um, Robert,

The thread is "what is recovery," not "what is AA". These forums include support for people not in AA or other twelve-step programs.

I'm in AA, myself, but I also like to take what's valuable to me from other approaches to recovery. That's my personal decision, and it works for ME.

There is a specific part of the forum for twelve-step recovery from alcoholism. You're certainly entitled to say what recovery means to you, as a member of AA, but it isn't really the place to argue with those who favor a different approach.

Thanks Lexie:-) I appreciate that Robert has had great success with AA and I am happy for him...but there are many people who recover without AA, it depends on your personal make-up. I have a lot of respect for it, but I really enjoy SR and if I were to think it was only open to people following AA I would probably stop coming eventually.

As I said at this point AA is not for me, maybe at some point I will reconsider, but I tend not to do well with groups that think their way is the only way, I know there are a lot of open-minded people in AA, so I don't want to think otherwise.

For me, today, recovery is spending a long weekend at my parents house, where there is tons of drinking and not feeling tempted, not being angry at them for drinking in front of me, not letting old hurts continue to hurt me and spending an hour scanning old family photos onto the computer:-)

Today is the last day of two weeks sober for me...first time in 12 years I have gone this long!

Understood, Lexie. I just want to be clear that, if you go by what the AA program is as outlined in our book, it is about the 12 steps. If you try some other method, it's not AA. It might be watered-down AA, self-help, etc. I used to "work my own program" until I nearly died.

In the early days of AA, they had 50-75% success in recovery. Interestingly, that's when they focused on the 12 steps. Nowadays, AA's success rate is in the single digits. And our meetings tend to be amalgamations of group therapy and pep rallies for sobriety without any focus on the solution.

I respect the right of anyone to recover in any way they want. If those methods don't work, however, I'd like for us not to blame AA.

Understood as well. I hear you.

I've had some interesting discussions with someone else on another board about "real" alcoholics (as the term is used in the Big Book) versus people like me (who, I'm told, isn't a "real" alcoholic--YET :)).

This thread isn't the place, but it's an interesting topic for discussion. I'll post about it one of these days when I've clarified my own thoughts and questions a bit more.

Welcome to the forums, incidentally!

Yeah, I've heard a bunch of different theories about real vs. fake alcoholics. As if someone would endure all this heartache because they are bored and need a hobby.

I'm going to post a brief overview of my story in the appropriate place and hopefully it clarifies some of the points I'm passionate about. But quickly: I was sober for 11 years. I relapsed and endured 3 years of pain and despair. It was only when I was taken through the steps (which I had never done before), that I felt relief. So I've become a bit of that annoying thumper type, which I swore I'd never be. Bear with me as I try to find the right voice for what I'm going through. Appreciate the welcome. By the way, I'm in North Jersey-- Hunterdon County.

Heh,

Well, FWIW, I wasn't referred to as a "fake" alcoholic, just not a "real" one (again, as the term is used in the Big Book). What I learned is that when some people in AA use the term "real" what they really mean are those alcoholics for whom no other approach could possibly work, at least in the opinions of the experts at the time.

I don't think everyone who is alcoholic fits that description. In fact, the Big Book acknowledges the desireability of offering recovery to those who have only felt the nip of the wringer.

I'll look forward to further conversations on the topic.

Hey Robert!

I can appreciate your passion for what has helped you, and I am really happy for you!

Hunterdon is Horse country...no? Beautiful part of NJ:-)

I would love to read your story some time, both about the 11 years and your current recovery!

I think mental satisfactions is more important.
it is just a journey.

I suffered from alcoholism when I was drinkin. I suffered from alcoholism when I was "not drinkin".

As long as I was aiming at a target that had "not drinkin" as a bulls-eye, I suffered from either the consequences of drinking or the bad feelings, that I drank to be free of.

When I started aiming at a target that had "spiritual fitness" as a bulls-eye, I stopped suffering. (period)

The drinkin stopped when the "not drinkin" stopped feeling like suffering.

Recovery to me means not having to apologize to myself when I keep doing the same thing wrong over and over again. It means being able to look into my son's eyes and honestly guide him with the best possible choices in life, without being a hypocrite and making the wrong choices myself.

It means a second chance at life that I shouldn't take lightly.

It means learning again what it is to be alive - REALLY alive - and not just existing.

Recovery for me means one thing: FREEDOM.

I was a slave to alcohol; I planned around my drinking, primed myself before going out (so it wouldn't look like I was drinking so much while out), stopped 8 hours before work (mostly anyway), only drank in the afternoon/evening, kept enough in the house so I wouldn't have to get in the car to get more (therefore avoiding potential DUI) and lots more.

All that planning, all that organising because of booze...I was at the stage where all grog was doing to me was taking from me, giving nothing back. Unless oblivion counts...:dunno:

Now I am FREE. And to use a corny lyric - I'm free to do what I want, any old time