Detox....can it be done at home???
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Merseyside,UK
Posts: 109
Detox....can it be done at home???
My b/f has been told that because he is not physically dependant on alcohol that he is no 'priority' for detox!
I dont understand how they can say this, my b/f,s drinking is getting worse, more days of the week are taken up by it and he has recently lost his job over it.
He has asked our local hospital if he can be sectioned cos he self harms and they said you need detox and when he goes and asks for detox they are basically saying no you dont need it and that they only have 2 beds for the whole of our area..
How can they just put someone 'on a list' and leave them to carry on drinking??????
Can he do it at home instead?? Anyone tried this at all???
Im at my wits end and my b/f feels so let down with the lack of help.
I dont understand how they can say this, my b/f,s drinking is getting worse, more days of the week are taken up by it and he has recently lost his job over it.
He has asked our local hospital if he can be sectioned cos he self harms and they said you need detox and when he goes and asks for detox they are basically saying no you dont need it and that they only have 2 beds for the whole of our area..
How can they just put someone 'on a list' and leave them to carry on drinking??????
Can he do it at home instead?? Anyone tried this at all???
Im at my wits end and my b/f feels so let down with the lack of help.
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
hey sam -
first of all - breathe.
welcome to SR.
if you have a family doc - you rboyfirend can go to them.
I detoxed at home.
And
it
was
hell.
but - on the bright side - I was far more 'gone' than your boyfriend.
First and formost -
he needs a 'connection' to a medical practiioner.
Whether the family doc
or a free clinic in town....
somebody he can call or that you can call.
If something needs to be monitored.
IT can be done at home, sure.
And YOU ... are going to see right off his level of committment.
Because when you do this at home -
you gotta WANT it.
I can't suggest enough as well - a program of recovery.
Because quitting drinking isn't just about putting the plug in the jug.
There's so very much more to sobriety than not drinking.
We alcoholics have to be taught how to function in all aspects of life
without sedatives.
Without our chosen means of chemical escape.
That takes far more than just not buying booze.
We need people around us who have done it
who understand what this feels like
(or doesn't feel like)
and who know what we're about to do... because they've already done or tried it.
Now, you say he was evaluated and they determined it wasn't necessary for him to be in a facility. Am I right in understanding that?
first of all - breathe.
welcome to SR.
if you have a family doc - you rboyfirend can go to them.
I detoxed at home.
And
it
was
hell.
but - on the bright side - I was far more 'gone' than your boyfriend.
First and formost -
he needs a 'connection' to a medical practiioner.
Whether the family doc
or a free clinic in town....
somebody he can call or that you can call.
If something needs to be monitored.
IT can be done at home, sure.
And YOU ... are going to see right off his level of committment.
Because when you do this at home -
you gotta WANT it.
I can't suggest enough as well - a program of recovery.
Because quitting drinking isn't just about putting the plug in the jug.
There's so very much more to sobriety than not drinking.
We alcoholics have to be taught how to function in all aspects of life
without sedatives.
Without our chosen means of chemical escape.
That takes far more than just not buying booze.
We need people around us who have done it
who understand what this feels like
(or doesn't feel like)
and who know what we're about to do... because they've already done or tried it.
Now, you say he was evaluated and they determined it wasn't necessary for him to be in a facility. Am I right in understanding that?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Merseyside,UK
Posts: 109
They said he wasnt 'high priority' whatever that means.
He has been to his doctor so many times and they have refered to psychi but weve not heard anything in 9 months.
His local alcohol service have not replaced his nurse that went on long term sick and seem to think he isnt physically addicted which i think is utter crap.(WHY DOES HE HAVE 24 CANS OF CIDER READY TO DRINK IN THE HOUSE TODAY???)
I have totally lost faith in our 'National Health Service'. Nobody cares if you are depressed/alcoholic/self harmer/suicidal.
You are dead before anyone intervines.
Im just so SICK of it all.
If you can afford private treatment my b/f would have been in detox that afternoon but unfortunately he has pissed all our money away and its not an option.
Most of all im annoyed cos this lack of help makes him drink even more, he feels like no-one will give him the help he so needs.
He has been to his doctor so many times and they have refered to psychi but weve not heard anything in 9 months.
His local alcohol service have not replaced his nurse that went on long term sick and seem to think he isnt physically addicted which i think is utter crap.(WHY DOES HE HAVE 24 CANS OF CIDER READY TO DRINK IN THE HOUSE TODAY???)
I have totally lost faith in our 'National Health Service'. Nobody cares if you are depressed/alcoholic/self harmer/suicidal.
You are dead before anyone intervines.
Im just so SICK of it all.
If you can afford private treatment my b/f would have been in detox that afternoon but unfortunately he has pissed all our money away and its not an option.
Most of all im annoyed cos this lack of help makes him drink even more, he feels like no-one will give him the help he so needs.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Merseyside,UK
Posts: 109
To be honest i dont know.
He doesnt talk much, he gets annoyed when i try and talk to him.
I find it so hard to get feelings and answers from him.
He says he doesnt want to be this way and says he hates what he doing.
He did go to the hospital and alcohol centre cos HE wanted to, i didnt even know he'd gone til i got home from work.
But since then because of the lack of active help hes just drinking again.
Cos what is the point if they dont think hes worthy of help???
I totally understand his thinking there.
He doesnt talk much, he gets annoyed when i try and talk to him.
I find it so hard to get feelings and answers from him.
He says he doesnt want to be this way and says he hates what he doing.
He did go to the hospital and alcohol centre cos HE wanted to, i didnt even know he'd gone til i got home from work.
But since then because of the lack of active help hes just drinking again.
Cos what is the point if they dont think hes worthy of help???
I totally understand his thinking there.
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
****{Hugs for Sammie}}}
ok. You've said more than you may know.. so I'm gonna pont out a couple of things to ya. okay? this is how we do it around here (as far as pointing out .. the 'being right is COMPLETELY up in the air - LOL)
Above all other things - let me put it in red ...
There are no doctors on this site and we do not give medical advice. If we say we're doctors, we're lying, and if we look like doctors... it's halloween.
ok. that outa the way -
There's some pretty signifigant stuff here.
In answer to the question - how bad does he want this', sam wrote:
ok.
that is so amazingly important ...
to an alcoholic ... it can be a matter of life and death.
Not to put too dramatic a spin on it.
yeah boy.
If that one aint' right outa the book
(well SOME book - it has to be) I don't know what is.
There's not an alcoholic on this site that doesn't know that one ... from the inside out.
That's a good sign, actually.
It indicates he knows he's in trouble.
Other than work, I mean.
Cold turkey quitting drinking ... without the supervision (at least by phone) of a medical practitioner ... can be fatal to an alcoholic. IT's that real. It's that simple. IT's that sudden.
When I detoxed = I had convuslions. There was no one at my house to call a doc. I had no idea anything was 'coming on' ... I just woke up on the floor with knots on my head.
I was a 'way on down the road' final stage kind of drinker.
One of the kind ... that don't usually survive, even IN a detox.
So I can't stress enough the danger.
There's a way.
The Infinite - ALWAYS provides a way.
Your best bet this minute - is to go read the stickies at the top if the 'friends and family of alcoholics ' forums.
I wonder.
Because he's thinking like an alcoholic.
HE .. is not thinking , at all.
The alcohol of his choice .. the BOOZE has been doing his thinking ... for some time now.
ok. You've said more than you may know.. so I'm gonna pont out a couple of things to ya. okay? this is how we do it around here (as far as pointing out .. the 'being right is COMPLETELY up in the air - LOL)
Above all other things - let me put it in red ...
There are no doctors on this site and we do not give medical advice. If we say we're doctors, we're lying, and if we look like doctors... it's halloween.
ok. that outa the way -
There's some pretty signifigant stuff here.
In answer to the question - how bad does he want this', sam wrote:
To be honest i dont know.
that is so amazingly important ...
to an alcoholic ... it can be a matter of life and death.
Not to put too dramatic a spin on it.
He doesnt talk much, he gets annoyed when i try and talk to him.
If that one aint' right outa the book
(well SOME book - it has to be) I don't know what is.
I find it so hard to get feelings and answers from him.
He says he doesnt want to be this way and says he hates what he doing.
He did go to the hospital and alcohol centre cos HE wanted to, i didnt even know he'd gone til i got home from work.
It indicates he knows he's in trouble.
Other than work, I mean.
But since then because of the lack of active help hes just drinking again.
When I detoxed = I had convuslions. There was no one at my house to call a doc. I had no idea anything was 'coming on' ... I just woke up on the floor with knots on my head.
I was a 'way on down the road' final stage kind of drinker.
One of the kind ... that don't usually survive, even IN a detox.
So I can't stress enough the danger.
Cos what is the point if they dont think hes worthy of help???
The Infinite - ALWAYS provides a way.
Your best bet this minute - is to go read the stickies at the top if the 'friends and family of alcoholics ' forums.
I totally understand his thinking there.
Because he's thinking like an alcoholic.
HE .. is not thinking , at all.
The alcohol of his choice .. the BOOZE has been doing his thinking ... for some time now.
same planet...different world
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Butte, America
Posts: 10,946
ok - that was getting too long.
The most intelligent thing he can do is to call Alcoholics Anonymous.
It's packed full of information.
It's brimming with SOLUTION.
And it's so full of 'been there done that ' recovering alcoholics, they're practically falling out the windows.
IT's fellowship.
It's free.
It's HOPE.
And it's a phonecall away.
Period.
YOU ... are the one I'm more concerned with at the moment.
I've been on both sides of this coin.
Do me a favor and go read those stickies.
Especially the 'friends and family' forum stickies.
those are for YOU.
Maybe make a mad dash trip to the book store for a copy .. the COMPLETE version of "under the influence".
If I can help - I hope you'll PM me.
*prayers for a safe and good beginning*
The most intelligent thing he can do is to call Alcoholics Anonymous.
It's packed full of information.
It's brimming with SOLUTION.
And it's so full of 'been there done that ' recovering alcoholics, they're practically falling out the windows.
IT's fellowship.
It's free.
It's HOPE.
And it's a phonecall away.
Period.
YOU ... are the one I'm more concerned with at the moment.
I've been on both sides of this coin.
Do me a favor and go read those stickies.
Especially the 'friends and family' forum stickies.
those are for YOU.
Maybe make a mad dash trip to the book store for a copy .. the COMPLETE version of "under the influence".
If I can help - I hope you'll PM me.
*prayers for a safe and good beginning*
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Merseyside,UK
Posts: 109
Thanks for all the advice.
I do know whats best for me. I need to feel happy and thats what im trying to do.
I want to be there for him but its killing me and i need me time, ive forgotten who i am.
I love him so much and he says he loves me but he needs to love HIMSELF too, thats the hard bit.
Im just gonna try and do things for myself but try and support him when he needs me.
I do know whats best for me. I need to feel happy and thats what im trying to do.
I want to be there for him but its killing me and i need me time, ive forgotten who i am.
I love him so much and he says he loves me but he needs to love HIMSELF too, thats the hard bit.
Im just gonna try and do things for myself but try and support him when he needs me.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: leichhardt, sydney, nsw
Posts: 21
i'm trying to get back to your original question, sam. i agree with barb. any sort of home detox needs to be done with supervision. i notice you're from the UK. i actually did my first home detox in london and then again here in australia. in london, i had a nurse visiting me daily, dosing me with valium, checking my vital signs, etc. i was lucky that i didn't have epilepsy then, which i do now and seizures are a threat. i am also glad that i am no longer physically addicted - it's the head stuff that i'm working on. your boyfriend, however, sounds like he needs it to function. indeed, he should be considered 'high priority'.
all the best to you and him
all the best to you and him
Recovering Alcoholic/Addict
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Sarasota, FL
Posts: 102
Sam:
Barb is right...in many ways, but two in particular mentioned here.
1. It can be done at home but is very risky without the help of a medical professional.
2. AA is only a phone call away and there will be people who can help your friend get the attention and support he needs.
Don't stop trying!
Barb is right...in many ways, but two in particular mentioned here.
1. It can be done at home but is very risky without the help of a medical professional.
2. AA is only a phone call away and there will be people who can help your friend get the attention and support he needs.
Don't stop trying!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 2
Hey Sam,
Yes, there are things you can do at home to help him detox - just research online. But better than any home or online solution is a real doctor! Keep trying to get him one. Hang in there.
I'm so sorry! That really, really sucks. I'm blown away that your hospital has only two beds!! That's ridiculous (in fact, if I were you I'd totally complain and ask them to get more).
But understand that, given their totally lame capacity for helping people, it is for the best that they help those who are physically dependent on alcohol first.
I was at one time physically dependent, and when I stopped almost cold turkey I got delirium tremens (hallucinations, a symptom of alcohol withdrawal) and when someone took me to the hospital (I still don't even know who) they said I could have died. So just know that it can get even worse than it is for your "bf".
I really am sorry by the way. Maybe your friend could enter a different program than the alcohol help program, because you said he "self harms". If by this you mean self-mutilation, it is a VERY serious problem and he needs help as soon as possible! You could definitely get him into some kind of local program which caters to people who suffer these kinds of problems.
Yes, there are things you can do at home to help him detox - just research online. But better than any home or online solution is a real doctor! Keep trying to get him one. Hang in there.
I'm so sorry! That really, really sucks. I'm blown away that your hospital has only two beds!! That's ridiculous (in fact, if I were you I'd totally complain and ask them to get more).
But understand that, given their totally lame capacity for helping people, it is for the best that they help those who are physically dependent on alcohol first.
I was at one time physically dependent, and when I stopped almost cold turkey I got delirium tremens (hallucinations, a symptom of alcohol withdrawal) and when someone took me to the hospital (I still don't even know who) they said I could have died. So just know that it can get even worse than it is for your "bf".
I really am sorry by the way. Maybe your friend could enter a different program than the alcohol help program, because you said he "self harms". If by this you mean self-mutilation, it is a VERY serious problem and he needs help as soon as possible! You could definitely get him into some kind of local program which caters to people who suffer these kinds of problems.
Last edited by Anna; 01-28-2008 at 04:18 PM.
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