heavenscent

I am a 28 yr old female and have been a heroin addict since I was 14 yrs old, I have attempted, recovery, treatment, moving across the country, councelling, jail, etc But have yet been able to kick I am know on methadone and still use often Is there really any hope for me? I have done some research and the odds are against me It is rare to see an older heroin addict I want so badly to just stop but something always brings me back Its insanity, it breaks my heart and my mothers I am sure I have recently decided to move again in hopes I can find more positive support in my life I know that moving doesn't offer a magical cure, but I am hoping that because I am moving closer to family it will help I have been in councelling for 9 years My brother (1 yr older then me) died recently in custody, I feel he gives me alot of strength, because he was also a addict but it is still odviouslly not enough You'd think losing the most important person in my life would be a reason to commit to change Is there anything else I can do...will power, determination, rock bottom I have been and am all those things Any advice would be apperciated:praying

llenroc66

I love your avitar. I am a 32 y/o alcoholic and understand that I am an alcoholic. I've been to jail and counseling. Maybe your reactions are stupider than mine, but they are both what they are.

Peopel recover. From your disease and mine. What will you do to recover? I have bee weak sofar and have not admitted much. When I take the step I may recover because I need help. I hate to say it, buty I am weak. I am not out. But I am not alone. Somebody's been here before...

Doug

It's never too late. I have a good friend in the Program I participate in (NA), he's 71 years old, and working on his 4th year of being clean and sober. He was active for longer than you've been alive.

Are the odds against you? I don't know....they are if nothing changes.

mae164

HOPE- YES! I am 27 and a recovered herion addict! I have been sober for a year and 7mo and could never stay sober out of being in rehab since i was 18! I worked the steps out of the Big Book of AA with a sponser who took me through it in @2 weeks and had COMPLETE UNDERSTANDING OF THE PROGRAM OUT OF THE BOOK and understood i only had a short period before i would go back out cause she had been there and is now free-COMPLETELY! not reliant on meetings, can go anywhere and do anything a free man can do!

THAT IS WHAT I DO WITH THE GIRLS I WORK WITH AND IT PROVES TO WORK! I ATTEND AN NA AND HA MEETING THAT USES THE aa BOOK AND GO TO A BIG BOOK AA GROUP- I would be more than glad to help in any way i can! god bless

savoy

My business partner is a recovered H addict, rumour has it that she worked the 12 steps in AA, using the Big Book and an experienced recovered sponsor. Apparently it works.

uncle holmes

Is there really a way out?

Sure. There's been many cases where people seem as hopeless as you who have eventually recovered. I'm one of them. The key is to keep on trying. If you don't use even for one day, that would be a good start. Take it one day at a time. At least for the first year, focus only on your recovery.

Focus right now on the first step, which is "We admitted we were powerless over drugs-that our lives had become unmanageable." Next, go to the second step which says "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity." Your brother is not your higher power. Either use God or your recovery group as a whole as your higher power. Next, go to the third step which says "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him."

Focus only on these first three steps for the first month. Get on your knees either first thing in the morning or after your coffee and/or breakfast. Just make sure you do this sometime in the morning. Don't ask your higher power for any wants. Only ask your higher power to keep you drug free just for today.

Next say the 3rd step prayer which is "God, I offer myself to thee-to build with me and do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I better do Thy will always! Amen."

Just work on keeping it as simple as this for your first month of recovery. If a person or people appear to interfere with your recovery, just say a short prayer for them such as "This is a sick person. How can I be helpful to them? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done."

Right now only focus on not using drugs to get high. If you smoke cigarettes or drink coffee, don't try to give those up right now. If you get the compulsion to use, fight it with your life. Say a short prayer, do something different. Add a little excercise everyday if you're not already doing this. This would be mainly stuff such as stretching and/or walking. If you're healthy enough add a little jog. Get to a meeting everyday or every other day.

I will be your temporary sponser till further notice. What I also want you to do is report on this forum topic everyday and let me know how your day went. Let me know if you stayed clean just for today. Report any problems or hangups that you experienced each day. Even if it's just a quick "Hello, I'm doing fine," that's ok also. Just make sure you check in at least once a day.

mae164

PLEASE- NO! I commend you on trying to be of service- but you do not have a clear understanding of what our solution is so please do not tell her that you are sponsering her! If she wants it she will ask which is the first requirement to ask for help- admitting you can not do this yourself and the action is asking someone! This is a program of action through out-are you even an h-addict ?
TO START THE STEPS ARE LAID OUT TO BE WORKED QUICKLY NOT THE FIRST 3 IN A MONTH THAT TAKES AN HOUR TO DO- 2ND A MAN IS UNTHINKING WHEN HE SAYS SOBERITY IS ENOUGH- TO ONLY CONCENTRATE ON SATYING SOBER FOR THE FIRST YEAR IS NOT OK- YOU ARE GIVING HER ADVICE FOR STEP 3 AND HAVE NOT EVEN EXPLANED HER THE PROBLEM AND WHY SHE NEEDS GOD-
sorry if i offend you- but this is life or death and the last thing needed is misgided info to be confused- i will stop now

uncle holmes

It would be unwise to attempt to do all the steps at once if a person can't even abstain for one day. If she did all twelve steps in two weeks, she would be doing inventory, making amends, and twelfth step work, all while she's still using. Are you joking?

Either way I'm not sure that it matters cause she hasn't responded to neither of us. If she really wanted help and wanted more info, she would have posted by now. If she would have posted and said she was staying sober, I would have gone on to explain the rest of the steps as well as relapse prevention planning, both which got me and kept me sober. Enough said.

stan5007

lol.... I don't know why anyone wouldn't want to work the steps quickly!!! If I was in a burning building there were 12 steps to get out, how long would you take. Here is the deal. The founders of this whole program worked the steps rapidly, b/c they saw the necessity to get this thing called a spiritual awakening. And the proof is in the stats. Check out forward to the 2nd edition sometime. On pg XX the did something amazing, they put some stats in there on how they were doing in their first 16 yrs. Over 75% were getting sober and staying sober. If anyone be a real alcoholic or addict we don't necissarily have a whole month before our mind tells us it is a good idea.

lol relapse prevention planning....how about work the steps and recover, the live in 10,11, &12 so you can stay that way. I really hope that your relapse prevention plan doesn't include avoiding people, places, or things... the so called triggers. Check out pg 101 - it goes on to tell us that any scheme for combating alcoholism that sheilds the sick man from temptation is doomed to failure.

if anyone has any questions about what I'm talking about I would be glad to further elaborate.

I love all you, and will help in any way I can.

Fluttering

There definitely is a way out. Alcohol and drugs are only a symtom. The root cause is what we need to deal with. We get to that by working the steps.
We have a spiritual malady . The treatment for a spiritual malady is having a spiritual expereince which is also found in the steps. Will power and determination aren't enough for addicts and alkies of our sort.
I too thought it was the end of the road for me. That was 21 + years ago. I have found my solution in this awesome program and walking a spiritual journey.

Keep praying...It will come

frescacan

What would you tell her that step one means?

uncle holmes

I don't know why anyone wouldn't want to work the steps quickly!!!

The steps are in order for a reason. If they weren't, step one could be anywhere from the middle to the end of the twelve steps. The first task of recovery is for alcoholics/addicts to recognize that they have a debilitating, life-threatening disease associated with the use of alcohol or other mood altering drugs. They must recognize that they have a disease that is impairing their ability to stay sober and to live productively.

Once this recognition is achieved, the second task of recovery is abstinence. Total abstinence is necessary. This means no alcohol in any form, no sleeping pills, sedatives, or mood-altering drugs.

The third task is to recognize the need for a daily program of recovery in order to give support and assistance in staying sober one day at a time.

If your house is burning, you cannot solve the problem by figuring out why it started. You must first put out the fire. If you have chemical dependency, your body has adapted and cannot go back to "normal" by addressing other issues. You must stop using mind-altering chemicals, and your body must adjust to not having them. In early recovery you must devote full attention to attaining abstinence, rebuilding your health, and establishing a system of care through AA/NA and treatment.

relapse prevention planning...how about work the steps and recover,

Relapse prevention planning does not replace AA/NA, nor does it diminish the importance of AA/NA principles and practices. It simply adds another powerful recovery tool to the already powerful principles of AA/NA.

When most people think about alcoholism they think only of the alcohol based symptoms and forget about the sobriety based symptoms. Yet it is the sobriety based symptoms, especially post acute withdrawal (PAW) that make sobriety so difficult.

PAW is a group of symptoms of addictive disease that occur as a result of abstinence from addictive chemicals. In the alcoholic these symptoms appear seven to fourteen days into abstinence and can last for many years without recognizing and treating it, even while sober.

Recovery causes a great deal of stress. Many chemically dependent people never learn to manage stress without alcohol and drug use. The stress aggravates the brain dysfunction and makes the symptoms worse. The severity of PAW depends upon two things: the severity of the brain dysfunction caused by the addiction and the amount of psyco-social stress experienced in recovery.

How do you know if you have PAW? The most identifiable characteristic is the inability to solve usually simple problems. There are six major types of PAW symptoms that contribute to this.
1. Inability to think clearly
2. Memory problems
3. Emotional overreactions or numbness
4. Sleep disturbances
5. Physical coordination problems
6. Stress sensitivity

PAW symptoms are not the same in everyone. They vary in how severe they are, how often they occur, and how long they last. Over a period of time PAW may get better, it may get worse, it may stay the same, or it may come and go.

Regenerative PAW gradually improves over time. The longer a person stays sober the less severe the symptoms become. It is easier for people with regenerative PAW to recover because the brain rapidly teturns to normal.

Degenerative PAW is the opposite. The symptoms get worse the longer a person is sober. This may happen even when a person is going to AA and/or following some type of recovery program. People with degenerative PAW tend to become relapse prone (Like heavenscent and like myself years ago until I learned about RPP). Sobriety becomes so painful that they feel they must self medicate the pain with alcohol or drugs, collapse physically or emotionally, or commit suicide to end the pain.

(To be continued on the next post)

uncle holmes

(Relapse prevention planning part 2)

People with stable PAW experience the same level of symptoms for a long period of time into recovery. There may be days when the symptoms are a little better or a little worse, but essentially the symptoms remain unchanged. Most recovering people find this very frustrating because they believe that they should be feeling better the longer they are sober. With sufficient sober time many people learn to manage these synptoms.

With intermittent PAW the symptoms come and go. Initially people with intermittent symptoms will appear to experience a regenerative pattern. But they begin to experience periodic PAW episodes that can be quite severe. For some people the episodes get shorter, less severe, and farther apart until they stop altogether. In others they occur periodically throughout life.

These patterns describe people who have not had treatment for PAW and who do not know how to manage or prevent the symptoms. Traditional treatment does not address these symptoms because until recently they were unrecognized. If you know what to do and are willing to do it, degenerative PAW can be changed into stable, stable into regenerative, and regenerative into intermittent PAW. The most common pattern of PAW is regenerative that over time becomes intermittent.

Managing PAW
The less you do to strengthen yourself against an episode of PAW, the weaker your resistance becomes. Conditions that put you in high risk of experiencing PAW symptoms are usually lack of care of yourself and lack of attention to your recovery program. If you are going to recover without relapse you need to be aware of stressful situations in your life that can increase your risk of experiencing PAW.

Since you cannot remove yourself from all stressful situations you need to prepare yourself to handle them when they occur. It is not the situation that makes you go to pieces; it is your reaction to the situation.

Because stress triggers and intensifies the symptoms of PAW, PAW can be controlled by learning to manage stress. You can learn to identify sources of stress and develop skills in decision making and problem solving to help reduce stress. Proper diet, exercise, regular habits, and positive attitudes all play important parts in controlling PAW. Some things to do when you are experiencing post acute withdrawal: 1. Stabilization, it's important to bring them under control. 2. Verbalization, start talking to people who are not going to accuse, criticize, or minimize. 3. Ventilation, express as much as you can about what you are thinking and feeling. 4. Reality Testing, ask someone if you are making sense. 5. Problem solving and goal setting, what are you going to do right now about what is going on? 6. Backtracking, think back over what has been happening. Can you identify how the episode started? What could have turned it off sooner?

Other things to do to help relieve the anxiety, guilt, and confusion that tend to create stress that intensify PAW symptoms are: 1. Education and retraining. As a recovering person, you need information in order to realize that the symptoms are normal during recovery. 2. Self-protective behavior. You are responsible for protecting yourself from anything that threatens your sobriety or anything that triggers post acute withdrawal symptoms. 3. Nutrition. The way you eat has a lot to do with the level of stress you experience and your ability to manage the symptoms of PAW. 4. Exercise. It reduces stress. Exercise produces chemicals in your brain that make you feel good. Stretching and aerobic exercise will probably be most helpful in your recovery. 5. Relaxation. Playing, laughing, listening to music, story telling, fantasizing, reading, and massage are some methods of natural stress reduction. 6. Spirituality. Belief in a higher power takes you out of the center of your universe and offers peace of mind and serenity by an awareness that there is a power that is not restricted by your weaknesses and limitations. 7. Balanced living. It means you are living resonsibly, giving yourself time for your job, your family, your friends as well as time for your own growth and recovery. It means allowing a higher power to work in your life. It means wholesome living.

(End of part 2 of RPP. I'll tell more about RPP on additional posts.)

uncle holmes

(Relapse prevention planning part 3)

Recovery and partial recovery
Recovery from addictive disease is a process that requires a long period of time. A recent research study indicates that it takes eight to ten years for the average recovering alcoholic to fully return to normal. The most serious problems caused by the addiction require two to three years to resolve. The more longstanding lifestyle problems require eight to ten years for full resolution.

The recovery process is developmental. It's a progression from abstinence (learning how to stop using alcohol and drugs) to sobriety (learning how to cope with life without alcohol and drugs) to comfortable living (learning how to live comfortably while abstinent) to productive living (learning how to build a meaningful sober lifestyle).

It is helpful to think about the recovery process as having six developmental periods. 1. Pretreatment (recognition of addiction) 2. Stabilization ( withdrawal and crisis management) 3. Early recovery (acceptance and non-chemical coping) 4. Middle recovery (balanced living) 5. Late recovery (personality change) 6. Maintenance (growth and development).

Partial recovery
Recovery from addictive disease is not a process of straight line growth. Most persons recover in stages over time. They develop a new understanding of their disease and recovery. They spend time applying and integrating that new knowledge into their daily lives. They then become comfortable and coast for awhile before the need for new knowledge develops.

It is common for recovering people to temporarily back-slide in their recovery. This often happens when they are attempting to put new knowledge to work. The stress of change temporarily gets the best of them and they back off for awhile. As the stress goes down, they talk about how to better manage the situation, they roll up their sleeves, and they get started again. Many recovering people eventually achieve long-term and comfortable sobriety.

Many people do not make it all the way through the recovery process. Partial recovery begins when they confront a recovery task that they believe to be unmanageable or insurmountable. This insurmountable recovery task is called a "stuck point." Being "stuck" causes them to fail to complete all of the recovery tasks. The consequence is that they remain uncomfortable and experience a low-quality sobriety.

A healthy and productive response to hitting a stuck point is to temporarily back off in order to lower stress. Instead of taking these productive steps, many people who are stuck in recovery use denial to cope with the stuck point. The denial is not used consciously. They automatically block the awareness that something is wrong. The stuck point produces stress; the denial, while temporarily blocking the awareness of the stress, eventually intensifies it.

As the stress increases, PAW symptoms begin to develop and get worse. Many recovering people do not consciously recognize the PAW symptoms. As a result, they cannot manage the post acute withdrawal symptoms. Instead they attempt to cope with them with more denial. The denial raises the stress; the stress makes the PAW worse. The PAW creates more problems, and these problems create additional stress that further aggravates the PAW.

The original stuck point is often overshadowed by severe problems that result from mismanaging the PAW. He or she becomes progressively more stressed. The increased stress leads to a state of free-floating anxiety and compulsion. The person feels to do something, anything, to relieve the anxiety and compulsion, often adopting compulsive behaviors that temporarily relieve the stress. The compulsive behavior, however, produces additional long-term problems in exchange for the short term relief.

Eventually the stress leads to the activation of the relapse porocess and these people begin losing control. As the loss of control breaks into conscious awareness, they see the handwriting on the wall. (If they keep doing what they are doing, they will use alcohol or drugs, go crazy, or attempt suicide to turn off the pain.) At this point they often reactivate their recovery programs and life is stabilized. They progress in recovery until the same block is encountered all over again.

It is often easy to believe that this IS recovery. Recovering people can become locked into a pattern of partial recovery. The big book of AA calls it "half measures." It is not alright to waste your life in partial recovery. You are worth more than that. The consequence of partial recovery is living a life of low-grade crisis, pain, and discomfort. Stress of partial rtecovery can and does cause stress-related illnesses that can and do shorten your life. You CAN recognize the stuck points and move beyond them into full recovery.

(End of part 3, still more to come)

uncle holmes

(Relapse prevention planning part 4)

Mistaken beliefs about recovery and relapse
The first step in preventing relapse is to understand what it is and what it is not. The more you know and understand about relapse the less risk there is that you will experience it and the less threatening it will be for you.

Mistaken beliefs about the role of alcohol and drug usein recovery:
Let us review this sequence of mistaken beliefs. 1. Recovery is abstinence from alcohol and drugs. 2. Relapse is alcohol and drug use. 3. Anytime I abstain from alcohol and drugs I am in recovery. 4. Anytime I return to alcohol and drug use I am in relapse. 5. As long as I don't use alcohol and drugs I will be in control of myself and my behavior.

Conclusion: Relapse is always the result of a conscious and deliberate choice to use alcohol and drugs. Not using alcohol and drugs is my primary task in recovery.

The error is that not using alcohol and drugs does not guarantee that you will be in control of yourself and automatically recover. The sobriety based symptoms can be so severe that they cause you to lose control of your judgement and behavior even when sober. Many alcoholics who relapse report they became so dysfunctional in recovery that a return to addictive use seemed like a positive option (myself included until I learned about RPP). They were in so much pain that they came to believe they only had three choices left: 1. Alcohol and drug use to medicate the pain. 2. suicide. 3. Insanity. Given these three options, the alcohol and drug use seemed like the best choice.

Mistaken beliefs about the warning signs of relapse:
1. All warning signs relate to drinking or drug use or missing AA meetings. 2. I will always know it when I am experiencing these relapse warning signs. 3. Once I am aware of the warning signs I will always be able to cope with them if I want to.

Conclusion: As long as I am not thinking about using and I am going to meetings I am fine.

These are serious warning signs. But these warning signs occur very late in the relapse process. By the time these warning signs develop, many alcoholics are already out of control of their judgement and their behavior. As a result, they be unable to recognize or take action to interrupt these warning signs.

Mistaken beliefs about motivation:
1. If I relapse I am not motivated to recover. 2. I will recover when I hurt enough as a result of my alcohol and drug use to want to recover. 3. If I relapse I have not hurt enough to want to stay sober.

Conclusion: Relapse prone people need to hurt more in order to interrupt their relapse patterns.

This is a devastating conclusion for relapse prone people to reach. It is true that some chemically dependent people relapse because they do not believe they are alcoholic. It does not apply to relapse prone people who know they are addicted and they cannot safely use alcohol or drugs. And yet they cannot stay sober no matter how hard they try. Most relapse prone alcoholics are in terrible pain (like me before I combined RPP with the twelve steps).

Mistaken beliefs about treatment:
1. No form of treatment or self-help group can help me stay sober, or 2. Treatment is 100% effective in preventing relapse.

Conclusion: If I relapse it is because I am constitutionally incapable of recovery, or there is no point in getting additional treatment; I cannot get well.

There is good treatment and bad treatment. There is treatment that is effective for some but not in others. Some people relapse because they have not attained the skills to stay sober. But that does not mean that they cannot. Chances are good that if you find a program that uses relapse prevention planning, you will be able to achieve long term sobriety or at least learn to stay sober for longer periods of time and significantly improve your life.

(End of part 4. More to come)

rabye

u can do it, dont use the past death as an excuse. try and understand what upsets you, drugs only mask problems, go to a meeting and take one day at a time, just try!!!!

drugs r not your problem, what is bothering you is the problem. but you know what, life is too short to waste on analysing problems, we all have them and we will always have them, so accept them!!!!!

just dont compromise your health in order to forget what is bothering you, its not worth it!!!!! look at the situation as it is, how stupid are we to risk our lives for problems?????

problems go, addiction stays, unless you make it go and you can, its up to you to just stop!!!!!

seek support from NA or any other support group and dont let worries and problems mess up your life!!!! beat them, its silly to let them get the better of you.

life is made for us to suffer, enjoy, love, risk and everything else, so accept it.

addiction CAN BE STOPPED, only if you decide to stop it!!!! and do stop it, life is too short and not worth wasting it on ****!!!!! be strong and face your problems, its not a big deal we all have them. talk about them but dont turn to drugs cause they will solve nothing at all.

good luck xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

uncle holmes

(Relapse prevention planning part 5)

What is relapse? In the early days of AA, in the mid 1930's, alcoholics were considered to have relapsed only when they began drinking again. Only the first step of AA mentions alcohol. The other steps talk about how to live sober. Instead of focusing on not drinking, the focus is on learning how to live effectively and comfortably without addictive use. This leads us to the concept that relapse has as much to do with how an individual is functioning as it does with whether or not that person is using alcohol or drugs.

With this way of thinking, the process of relapse includes becoming dysfunctional in sobriety. This dysfunction may involve physical, psychological, or social health. This does not mean that addictive use is not relapse. It means that the process of relapse is occuring before addictive use begins! When addictive use starts, it is a RESULT of the relapse process that is already occuring. Addictive use is a way to medicate the pain of the dysfunction. The dysfunction begins as a mental process that in AA is called "stinking thinking." That leads to a change in behavior that AA calls a "setup." It finally leads to disfunctional behavior in sobriety that in AA is called a "dry drunk." This dry drunk may lead to addictive use or some other form of serious dysfunction such as emotional disturbance, physical collapse, or stress-related illness.

Many recovering alcoholics have remained drug free but have committed suicide or have collapsed physically or emotionally. This is not recovery. With this expanded understanding of the process of relapse, the focus of life is not just on using or not using. It is on recovery from damage caused by the addiction, on learning to manage sobriety based symptoms, and on improving bio-psycho-social health.

The role of caffeine
In the last few years research has begun to show that caffeine can be used addictively, is harmful to health and functioning, and can reactivate the addictive cycle for people seeking to recover from alcohol addiction. Alcoholics tend to be heavier consumers of caffeine than nonalcoholics. Heavy caffeine users suffer from caffeine-related anxiety, stress, irritability, and overreaction. They do not know that these symptoms are caused by caffeine, so they fear something more serious may be happening to them. Mood altering drugs such as caffeine and nicotine that were once considered harmless now can be considered as harmful to recovery.

The role of compulsive behavior in relapse
Compulsive behaviors are actions that produce intense excitement or emotional release and are followed by long term pain and discomfort. Remember the addiction equation: PAIN + ALCOHOL/DRUGS = IMMEDIATE PLEASURE + FUTURE PAIN. When a person comes to rely upon compulsive behaviors as a substitute for alcohol or drugs the equation changes to this: PAIN + COMPULSIVE BEHAVIOR = IMMEDIATE PLEASURE + FUTURE PAIN. Here are the eight major compulsive behaviors: 1. Eating/dieting. 2. Gambling. 3. Working/Achieving. 4. Exercising. 5. Sex. 6. Thrill seeking. 7. Escape. 8. Spending.

Positive outlets versus compulsive behaviors
The same behavior can be used compulsively or non-compulsively. There is a difference between a compulsive behavior and a positive outlet. A positive outlet is an activity that provides pain free pleasure. Healthful exercise is a positive outlet. Healthy sex is also a positive outlet. The behavior becomes compulsive when it is used to cope with the pain of reality. If a person is to achieve high quality sobriety and avoid relapse it is advisable to abstain from compulsive behaviors and to identify and practice a number of positive outlets that give pain free pleasure.

The process of relapse
The tendency to ignore other symptoms of relapse, cross addiction to "acceptable drugs" like nicotine and caffeine, and the use of compulsive behaviors allows the PROCESS of relapse (dysfunction in sobriety) to begin. Sobriety is abstinence from addictive drugs plus abstinence from compulsive behaviors plus improvements in bio-psycho-social health. Sobriety includes all three things. It is not defined entirely by whether or not you are drinking or using drugs. It is defined by the completeness of your sobriety. Relapse prevention planning is the process of bringing symptoms of relapse into conscious awareness and taking action that will allow you to remove them from your life.

(End of part 5. More to come.)

kelsh

I really don't understand what is going on here. A man does not usually sponsor a woman?; a person does not tell another person that they are going to sponsor anyone; A person does not tell one person when and how they have to report to them.

I have 19 years of sobriety with the AA program and have never seen anything like this before. :puppet

kelsh

savoy

these things may be of interest to the scientific mind but have little to do with out simple spiritual program.

uncle holmes

(Relapse prevention planning part 6)

The relapse syndrome
Recovery from addiction must be an active process. Recovering persons must work an active program. Recovery from addiction is like walking up a down escalator. It is impossible to stand still. When you stop moving forward, you find yourself moving backwards. You do not have to do anything in particular to develop symptoms that lead to relapse. Once you abandon a recovery program it is only a matter of time until the symptoms of PAW appear, and if nothing is done to manage them, you will experience a period of out of control behavior that we call the relapse syndrome.

It is important for you to always be aware that the relapse process does not only involve the act of taking a drink or using drugs. It is a progression that creates the overwhelming need for alcohol or drugs. It is this progression that we call the relapse syndrome. It is possible to interrupt this progression before the warning signs are obvious. If nothing is done until you are showing the obvious signs it is usually very difficult to interrupt the relapse syndrome because you have already lost control of your judgement and your behavior.

Interrupting the relapse syndrome
Managing the symptoms of PAW is the best method of relapse prevention. However, when you are already in an episode of dysfunction, it may be too late to utilize those methods, and you will need some help to become stabilized and to prevent further progression. The first thing to do is to utilize an adequately controlled environment where you can be protected from the immediate crisis and from the availability of alcohol and drugs. If the episode is mild, some time in a quiet, calm environment will probably be sufficient for you to begin to reverse the process. If the situation is moderately severe it may be necessary to take some time off work and to plan some time away from places and people that intensify the problem. If the relapse symptoms are severe, hospitalization may be necessary before using occurs or before you have a severe breakdown of another type.

The phases and warning signs of relapse
The relapse process causes the recovering person to feel pain and discomfort when not drinking. This pain and discomfort can become so severe that the recovering person becomes unable to live normally when not drinking, and feels that taking a drink cannot be any worse than the pain of staying sober.

Here are the phases and warning signs of relapse:
Phase 1: Internal change: 1-1. Increased stress: I begin to feel more stressed than usual. 1-2. Change in thinking: I begin to think my recovery program is not as important as it used to be. 1-3. Change in feeling: I start having unpleasant feelings that I don't like. 1-4. Change in behavior: I start acting different.

Phase 2: Denial: 2-1. Worrying about myself: I feel uneasy about the changes in my thinking, feelings, and behavior. 2-2. Denying that I'm worried: I go into denial and try to persuade myself that everything is ok when it really isn't.

Phase 3: Avoidance and defensiveness: 3-1. Believing I'll never use alcohol or drugs: I convince myself that I don't need to put a lot of energy into my recovery program today because I will probably never go back to alcohol or drug use. 3-2. Worrying about others instead of self: I take the focus off myself by becoming more concerned about the sobriety of others than about my personal recovery. 3-3. Defensiveness: I feel reluctant to discuss personal problems and what I am doing to recover because I am afraid I will be criticized or confronted. 3-4. Compulsive behavior: I start using compulsive behaviors to keep my mind off how uncomfortable I am feeling. 3-5. Impulsive behavior: I start creating problems for myself by using poor judgement and impulsively doing things without thinking through. 3-6. Tendencies toward loneliness: I start feeling uncomfortable around others and start spending more time alone.

Phase 4: Crisis building: 4-1. Tunnel vision: I start to think my life is made up of separate and unrelated parts. 4-2. Minor depression: I start to feel depressed, down, blue, listless, and empty of feelings. 4-3. Loss of constructive planning: I stop planning ahead and thinking about what I am going to do next. 4-4. Plans begin to fail: My plans begin to fail and each failure causes new problems.

Phase 5: Immobilization: 5-1. Daydreaming and wishful thinking: It becomes more difficult to concentrate or figure things out. 5-2. Feelings that nothing can be solved: I begin to feel like a failure who will never be able to get anything right. 5-3. Immature wish to be happy: I have a vague desire "to be happy" or to have "things work out," but I don't set up any plans to make those things happen.

Phase 6: Confusion and overreaction: 6-1. Difficulty in thinking clearly: I start to have trouble thinking clearly and solving usually simple problems. 6-2. Difficulty in managing feelings and emotions: Sometimes I overreact emotionally and feel too much. At other times I become emotionally numb and can't figure out what I am feeling. 6-3. Difficulty in remembering things: At times I have problems remembering things and learning new information and skills. 6-4. Periods of confusion: I start getting confused more often, and the confusion is more severe and lasts longer. 6-5. Difficulty in managing stress: I start having trouble dealing with stress. 6-6. Irritation with friends: My relationships with friends, family, counselors, and other recovering people become strained. 6-7. Easily angered: I feel irritable and frustrtated.

Phase 7: Depression: 7-1. Irregular eating habits: I either start to overeat or I lose my appetite and eat very little. 7-2. Lack of desire to take action: I can't get started or get anything done. 7-3. Difficulty sleeping restfully: I cannot fall asleep. When I do sleep, I have unusual dreams, awaken many times, and have difficulty falling back to sleep. 7-4. Loss of daily structure: My daily routine becomes haphazard. 7-5. Periods of deep depression: I feel depressed more often.

Phase 8: Behavior loss of control: 8-1: Irregular attendance at AA and treatment meetings: I start finding excuses to miss therapy and self-help group meetings. 8-2. An "I don't care" attitude: I try to act as if I don't care about the problems that are occuring. 8-3. Open rejection of help: I cut myself off from people who can help. 8-4. Dissatisfaction with life: Things seem so bad that I begin to think I might as well go back to alcohol or drug use because things couldn't get worse. 8-5. Feelings of powerlessness and helplessness: I have trouble "getting started."

Phase 9: Recognition of loss of control: 9-1. Difficulty with physical coordination and accidents: I start having difficulty with physical coordination that results in dizziness, poor balance, difficulty with hand-eye coordination, or slow reflexes. 9-2. Self-pity: I begin to feel sorry for myself and may use self-pity to get attention at AA or from family members. 9-3. Thoughts of social use: I start to think that alcohol or drug use will help me feel better. 9-4. Conscious lying: I know that I am lying, using denial and making excuses for my behavior, but I can't stop myself. 9-5. Complete loss of self confidence: I feel trapped and overwhelmed because I can't think clearly or do the things I know I need to do to solve my problems.

Phase 10: Option reduction: 10-1. Unreasonable resentment: I feel angry because of the inability to behave the way I want to. 10-2. Discontinues all treatment and AA: I stop attending all AA meetings. 10-3. Overwhelming loneliness, frustration, anger, and tension: I feel completely overwhelmed. I believe there is no way out except drinking, suicide, or insanity. 10-4. Loss of behavior control: I experience more and more difficulty in controlling thoughts, emotions, judgements, and behaviors.

Phase 11: Alcohol and drug use: 11-1. Attempting controlled use: I convince myself that I have no choice but to use alcohol or drugs and that using will somehow make my problems better or allow me to escape from them for a little while. 11-2. Disappointment, shame, and guilt: I feel disappointed because alcohol and drugs don't do for me what I thought they would. 11-3. Loss of control: My alcohol or drug use spirals out of control. 11-4. Life and health problems: I start having severe problems with my life and health.

(End of part 6. More to come.)