Dee74

I ate cake and all those bad sugary things for a while. its not recommended, by wiser health focused heads than mine, but whatever works.

D

CallMeJosh

I’m the most impatient person I know. That’s all. Still sober. Still just existing.

Dee74

I think I've mentioned before I was convinced that me and my life had gotten as good as I was going to get sober, and that joylessness was my new normal.

I was wrong

D

CallMeJosh

I feel that way.. “this is as good as it’s gonna get.. so get some pills.. have a shot of tequila.. commiserate and move on..you’re an addict. So?”

yeah. I just had that conversation with myself.. don’t worry..

..I’m still sober.

Dee74

I'm not worried Josh - if you can beat down that little voice, cos you know it's full of lies, you're off to a great start

D

CallMeJosh

I have this conversation with myself daily: “I need something to feel better. How did that work last time? It didn’t. Ok. Maybe tomorrow.” I feel if I say that “maybe tomorrow” enough I won’t have the conversation with myself eventually. Anyways.. still here. Still sober.

RunningScared

You are to be commended for staying sober. This just takes time, often a long time. I developed a couple of small hobbies. I used to build model Estes rockets when I was younger, so I started that again. Going for a walk or a drive is a good way to kill an hour or two. I think it does get better, but as cliche' as it sounds, it takes time. For many, a really long time.

Dee74

I found the truth was I could do something to feel better - run, ride a bike, watch TV, help someone out - but relying on something to artifically make me feel better was old thinking.

I found that sometimes too that I didn't need to feel better _ some days just plain suck even in recovery.

​​​​​​​D

Introvrtd1

Just being quite honest, I still think about wanting to drink all the time…I miss being intoxicated, however like you said…it never works out the next day. Feeling miserable with a hangover, anxiety and the like. I don’t miss those miserable feelings all.

So how do you guys deal with the boredom of not drinking?

CallMeJosh

I keep myself occupied.. and when that doesn’t work - I remind myself that “I’m going to get a refill and be diligent and take my medicine as prescribed.” Fast forward three years later - and I’m only worse off. I keep reminding myself of that.. as for boredom I DO SOMETHING. Go for a walk. Clean something. Just do anything to get my mind off that train of thought.

Dee74

I think boredoms a state of mind really, or it was for me.
I'd been a drinker so long all my ideas of fun came from a bottle.

I started new hobbies or picked up old ones. I volunteered in my community. I read all the books I'd put off reading.

I had to be open to new opportunities to do things, either alone or with others.
It took some work, especially when all I wanted was to curl up in a ball.

I'm not saying I never get bored or never feel glum but its a rare day for that now - I just don't have time to be bored now.

D

Dee74

D

Dee74

How’s it going Josh?

D

CallMeJosh

I’ve been better. But I’m still sober. Just one of those days where I hope for a better tomorrow and pray for the strength. I read somewhere that things become a habit after 21 days… can being sober be my new habit then? At day 22 today I can confirm it is not a habit.


Yet.

Dee74

Congrats on 3 weeks tho - thats a great start Josh

D

CallMeJosh

Another day.

finding I have to push myself and motivate myself to stay happy and sober. This isn’t easy.. but I keep hearing it is worth it.

much love to anyone reading. Much love to anyone commenting

Dee74

Keep moving forward man

D

Zencat

Hi Josh good work at remaining clean even when it is rough going,

7 months sober/clean I too push myself to be content and yes happy. I apply the ' fake it until you make' philosophy to my wellness plan of action. I will drag my rotten mood and move my body to do the things I used to enjoy. I will go through all the actions. For me it was working on all my half finished, broken and neglected HO scale hobby. I guess I take a stoic approach to wellness. I will force myself to do something I hate to do. Maybe my mood is slow to catch-up but by doing stuff reluntcaly, I do feel the mood lift I get from accomplishing something that is meaningful to me. I hope this helps you Josh.

CallMeJosh

Thanks Dee and Zen.. Zen, that makes perfect sense and I’m the same.. and HO scale stuff is cool! I know I have an HO scale train in a box somewhere!

CallMeJosh

I went to a counselor awhile back.. and she asked me to think of the last time I was “truly happy.”

the problem with that is the last time I was truly happy was a long time ago.. now I’m finding myself “living in the past” and longing for those happier times..

those happy times were over 20 years ago. Clearly I cannot recreate that happiness.. how do I find happiness now? I only want to use and drink.. that seems to be the only way to create any happiness.

clearly I know that isn’t right..or healthy.

what has worked for you guys? Finding new hobbies isn’t really working.

thanks in advance