penelope222

Hi I hope someone could give me some advice on how to deal with this ongoing and draining situation. I have a partner for 11 years, we have 2 young children together.. He is an alcoholic and a drug addict. He has received treatment on different occasions, but always ended up going back drinking and drugging again. Until last year, he stopped drinking etc. Right before he stopped he had become very close to my older son, 19. from a previous relationship, who made the stupid mistake of becoming a drug dealer. He was supplying him with free cocaine. My partner went iff the rails and ended up in treatment. My son was forced to leave as my partner is extremely angry and threatening. However I urged him to come home, had a talk with him, had many talks with him, he promised he would stop dealing. Partner promosed hed stop drink and drugs. But though he hasnt drank in over a year he smokes cannabis and the amount is increasing. He has taken cocaine occasioally too. He is also on a lot of pain medication. Yesterday he had a go at my son over stupid things, but told me it was because of the dealing.. He punched him! My son closed a door on him. I disagree with dealing of course but my partner is shouting about it whilst high on cannabis that he purchased from a drug dealer. Please tell me how I should do this. My son hates me because he sees me allowing a man to hurt him. My partner wants my son gone as he wants his kids safe. I really need advice. As i said, he is a very angry man and now my son is becoming v angry too. I own the house. And i have no where else to go. Im sorry its so long. And im sorry if its not relevent. I hope it is. Thanks.

Dee74

Hi Penelope

I'm sorry for what brings you here but this is a place of great support.

I'm sorry for being blunt but neither your partner or your son seem like good role models right now.
I'm not a parent, but I would make protecting the younger kids my priority.

I also recommend you look at out family and friends forums for advice from the 'other side' as it were.
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...ly-alcoholics/
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...tance-abusers/

D

trailmix

HI Penelope,

I hope you will visit the Friends and Family forum as well, as Dee mentioned.

Dee is also right, this is parenting off the rails, don't you think?

I hope you will post in Friends and Family, but my short answer is, it's your house, perhaps you should have them both leave (your older son and your Husband)?

The only people in this scenario that can't protect themselves are the younger children, so that really just falls to you.

penelope222

Thankyou both. I will.