CallMeJosh

Hey guys and gals.

Firstly, thanks for being you.
Today is day...14. It's been a long time since I've made it this long. The withdrawals are all but gone. Now the mental game. This is where I need some tips.

I'm finding that doing the simplest of tasks is nearly impossible. I make a short list and accomplish it. Or...I work for 10 solid minutes and sometimes I'm motivated to keep going. These completed lists and working more than 10 minutes are few and far between.

What happens? I end up finding myself saying 'I can't do this sober.' So, stubborn me, I do it sober. It should be an accomplished task and I should see it as 'hey I did it sober last time. I can do it again sober.' But it sometimes ends up that it doesn't get done. For instance, dishes, laundry, going to work. Working at work...

The question: What am I to do to stay motivated or simply start?

The more important question: About how long did it take for you to find things fun and interesting again. Everything is just...gray. Nothing is fun or exciting, everything is negative, and of course, I know that's a bit ridiculous...I just struggle from time to time.

Thanks for your words,
Yes I attend meetings...exercise regularly, eat well...and am being patient. It's just time to time...I struggle.

Kindest regards,
J

doggonecarl

Fourteen days is awesome! But still early in recovery. Be patient. Your interest in things will improve the longer you are clean. I wouldn't agonize to much about what isn't getting done. The focus, the motivation, has to be on staying clean.

teatreeoil007

Hi Josh. I know how it feels when everything is sort of gray. Ate that time in my life I was depressed. I eventually pulled out of it and life felt brighter. If that "grayness" continues, I would get seen by a Dr. Also, how have you been sleeping?

CallMeJosh

Hey there everyone,

Thanks for the responses. It's amazing. Even if the response is technically 'bad news' or something I may not want to hear - it's still a response and SUPPORT. Thank you.

I'm struggling through the days. Remembering how well and efficient I would work when popping pills and now not popping pills...the difference literally is me getting all my work done in a few days versus actually taking all work week.

I'm perhaps asking too much of myself in that I want to be at THIS LEVEL when I'm at ( * this level * ).

I'm so tired of sneezing and yawning. But not as much as I'm tired of not finding enjoyment and just...moving. That's my biggest complaint. I don't need an exciting day...it's amazing how much of my day relied around those little pills. It disgusts me.

Thanks for your support.

Marcus

It is tough in the beginning. We have done a lot of damage to our body and our brains through using. Great thing is we can recover. Early on just staying sober for the day should be considered a major victory. I did have to push myself at times because I didn't feel like doing much of anything. Don't overwhelm yourself with everything that needs to get done. Take what is right in front of you and focus on that. Small accomplishments can yield big results.

You eventually find yourself in a groove and the motivation and lust for life does come back. Life is so much more rewarding sober - mentally, physically, and emotionally. That does not mean it is easy, but if you can embrace the pain and the struggle as part of the process of growth it is easier to accept. My mindset was key during this time. If I could work with my thinking and accept it instead of battling against it and arguing with myself all of the time I was much more at peace with it. Take Care!

CallMeJosh

Thanks for the support.

I'm finding myself not enjoying anything and just overall ready to sleep. You see, sleeping passes the time where I'm not thinking about drugs or bored and apathetic.

Make sense? Pitiful... Probably. But that's where I'm at.

Talk soon

teatreeoil007

Hang in there josh.... we know the feeling.... and yes we support you 🤗

CallMeJosh

Definitely been one of those bad days.. just struggling to get any work done and stay positive and engaged with life.

Nothing matters..I'm super apathetic.. I hate it.

teatreeoil007

Apathy is a tough bugger for sure...hard to pull out of it. It could be PAWS you're feeling; it could be depression. If you are able to sleep I envy you as I have the opposite problem: I have struggled with insomnia.
My Dr. put me on an antidepressant recently, and it have helped my insomnia and I have more energy when I wake up in the morning. But, it was prescribed for pain. Hang in there Josh. Just know you have our support and understanding.

OpioPhobe

Josh - music was very helpful for motivation in the early days. There were times that I just had to rest though, and give myself permission to do so. At 2 weeks I was still quite weak from the withdrawal and felt apathetic too. It felt like I was wearing a lead suit or something and getting off the couch was a task in itself.

If you are going to meetings and know people in the fellowship maybe you could invite them over for coffee. That might help with procrastination on the dishes / cleaning so you will have a deadline to get it done by.

CRRHCC

Values and purpose are the main navigational tools in life. Your values are the starting place for all your beliefs, actions and behaviors.
Your values may have become obscured during your drinking or drugging or compulsively adhering to hurts habits and hangups. In fact one of the reasons why you became so unhappy during that time is probably because you were living in a way that really didn't correspond with your values or how you wanted to live. Unless you value being helpless, trapped, lacking control, frustrated and sad, then I guess you were not living according to your values at all. It is important that you get to your true values, because following them and living them is the very foundation of what will make you happy in life. At least that is my experience.