Coming off... drum roll... 75 vicodins a day
 

Today is Day 2 of withdrawals.

Going through hell but am hoping to get through the next 2-3 days and then start to feel better.

Can you believe 14 5mg pills at a time? And yes they had the acetaminophen with them.

I have to be done. That was too close to disaster. That's what happens when an addict gets full access to as much hydrocodone as he wants.

Welcome back RailDawg :)

It might be a good idea to see a Dr & make sure your liver is ok after all that acetaminophen?

I know this is not your first rodeo - have you thought about the nuts and bolts of how you'll stay clean and sober this time?

D

I have to Dee. I hid it from everyone for years. When I hit 75 a day I knew it had to be the end.

Quit alcohol 27 years ago. I need to quit hydro.

Thanks for remembering!!

Hey I am right there with you. When I quit last January I was taking up to 100 pills a day of the 5mg/350mg of acetaminophen. It was awful. My body was falling apart in slow motion. I was killing myself and I couldn't stop. I would take and take and take and want this certain high that I would only get when I would first wake up. I would wake up in detox mode and have to take take all day long. I was spending 100 plus a day and it was awful.

There is a way out. You didn't die and you want the change. It can happen.

Proud of you for posting here. Keep with us man. If you quit alcohol you know how it will be to quit this. Rough for a bit and then a plan to stay sober...

hang tight.

I am so glad you wrote this. Thank you! I know I was on the outer edges of safety and the high was exactly as you described.

Great to get rid of dope sick in the morning then slamming rest of day.

I have to be done. Still going through hell tomorrow is Day 3.

How long did you feel like crud? Did you go CT?

Thanks again!!

Your liver will be thanking you for it might not have lasted long under those conditions???

Good luck with your sobriety,
M-Bob

I felt like hell for a while. I had to live, eat and breath recovery for a good 3 weeks or so. I was living in china so I was going to work then straight to the bus, then sit at the coffee shop across from where they had meetings. I didn't do anything but work and meetings. I was sick as a dog. Sleep finally came and the appetite came back as well. If I had to do it all over I would love to be in a detox centre. But I did it on my own..

good morning. how are we doing? how was the night?

Not comfortable at all.

This is Day 3. Haven't been out of bed since I started.

I know I'm entering the worst time.

I need to go to NA. AA helped me quit alcohol and I think I'm going to need NA to make this stick.

Thanks for checking in!!

I would do detox but my wonderful wife has no idea.

She is caring for me. Good woman.

you are lucky to be alive

I would get up to 600 pills and then hide groups of 25 or so in a dozen places in the barn and garage.

When I started getting low on my main supply the hunt for all the places I hid the pills would begin.

Invariably the supply was gone but I could usually get more although my wife was suspicious that something was going on.

I didn't taper very much. 3-4 days of codeine and then CT.

Part of me wants to hunt for more in the barn to continue the taper but now that I'm on Day 3 I think I'm going to suffer and power through.

This is best don't you think? I could get a handful from my mom who lives close but I'm not going to ask. The desire to taper more is coming from the desire to use.

75 a day to nothing is a lot to do. finaltime beating 100 is nothing short of amazing.

I'm listening. Do you think I was on the edge?

I think I was. They say 90mg hydro is fatal. That might be for a non-user I'm not sure. I was at 70 mg per dose 5-6 times a day.

The acetaminophen will probably kill you first (20 grams a day or whatever you were at), but regardless bad news either way. I remember you from 2 years ago. I am not sure what went wrong back then (think you made it a few weeks). Obviously withdrawals suck, but for me it was just a small part of the equation.

If I were you I would get back to some meetings. If you are comfortable going to AA (not sure if and when you quit going) why not go back? For me it is about living life on a day to day basis without the need to escape. Doesn't matter if it is alcohol, popping pills, sniffing glue, banging heroin, drinking cough syrup, or some other unhealthy behaviors. They are all a means to an end. I used to get caught up in the amounts. Like I did so much more than others so was so much more sick or I did less so wasn't as bad. Regardless of the amount if you want to change and have a strong desire to change you can. Yes change is hard, but really was the only way I was going to live a peaceful and fulfilling life. Alcohol and drugs were never going to be a solution for me.

Hang in there - keep posting - and don't use. Take Care!

I didn't realize Marcus that I went through this 2 years ago.

Seriously I had forgotten. I thought my last CT withdrawal was 8 years ago.

I went from 10 vicodins a day 2 years ago to 75 a day.

Out of control.

Yeah I'm going to have to do more than just quit to make it stick this time.

You can go back and look at your old posts (click on your profile and view history). It might be enlightening to you as far as how the progression goes. Might have only been 10 a day back then, but regardless appears to be an ongoing struggle for you. Quitting drinking is a great accomplishment, but I guess you have found some replacements. I am not judging you trust me. I have done my share of messed up things and was able to justify them to myself. We are all just trying to get through life and I am no different than you. Just be honest with yourself and no need to beat yourself up. Congrats on making a change and hope you can find the support you need to continue to find your way.

Good point about replacing the drinking Marcus.

Never thought of it that way.

Wish you the best!

how we doing

and yes I am not exaggerating on 100. IN china they come in boxes not bottles. Each box has a pack of 10. They are in this tin foil type thing and you pop them out. I would be popping so many out that my thumb and forefinger would get raw!@ talk about gross.