Given up
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 11
Given up
On Saturday, May 16th, I'll be 3 months sober. I am a recovering cocaine addict. I've had this app for quite some time and this is my first post. I've just about given up. I'm having a very difficult time. Most have this stereotypical image of drug user, I don't fall into that image. Not many know of my addiction. I'm quite young and no one thinks it's possible for a 16 year old girl to be addicted to anything. I am. And I want to use. Groups have never been affective for me. Hoping for some advice on how to make it.
Pressure makes diamonds
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 521
Hi Kelsey,
Congratulations on the 3 months, that is a huge accomplishment. Do you have a family member, friend or teacher who you could confide in for support? Please continue to check in and post here, you will find a lot of support.
Congratulations on the 3 months, that is a huge accomplishment. Do you have a family member, friend or teacher who you could confide in for support? Please continue to check in and post here, you will find a lot of support.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,313
Hi and welcome Kelsey 
I'd wager not many of us look like drug addicts. We're just normal guys and gals from all walks of life...who share a common problem
You'll find a lot of support and understanding here.
What kind of groups did you try - just curious?
D
I'd wager not many of us look like drug addicts. We're just normal guys and gals from all walks of life...who share a common problem
You'll find a lot of support and understanding here.
What kind of groups did you try - just curious
?D
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,507
Kelsey, I'm so glad you posted about what you're going through. I think talking things over here will help. Please stay with us and keep posting. You can make it through this and have a wonderful life - please never give up on yourself.
Member
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 196
Don't give up now! 90 days is a significant milestone. The drug is just about out of your body. Your cravings will continue to decrease. You should be proud that your eyes are open at such a young age. Keep on the right track, never use again, and this can just be dark chapter of your youth. If you fail, you will face a long and dark journey. I am really cheering for you.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
Kelsey - Welcome to SR and congratulations on 3 months!!
I abused crack, and it took me from the person no one would ever suspect to a bottom I wouldn't wish on anyone.
I'm way older than you, but I have loved ones who are about your age. I only wish that I had realized what a dead end street drugs were when I was your age.
Please keep reading and posting. You are not alone.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
I abused crack, and it took me from the person no one would ever suspect to a bottom I wouldn't wish on anyone.
I'm way older than you, but I have loved ones who are about your age. I only wish that I had realized what a dead end street drugs were when I was your age.
Please keep reading and posting. You are not alone.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 10
Sorry to hear that your parent's are not willing to support you in getting clean or fixing the "situation" as they call it. You must be super proud that you made it to 90 days! That is amazing! Do you have any siblings that might be supportive or any really good friends? Welcome by the way!!
Last edited by Tryingtoheal87; 05-12-2015 at 07:28 PM. Reason: Spelling
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 11
Have a girl friend who is supportive but she's been giving up on me just like everyone has. I feel empty. Withdrawal is a real think. Not many realize it. And I'm as my peak point of calling someone and but.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,313
noone here will give up on you KT. We've all been there
90 days is rough because it's long enough for us to forget the really bad stuff but not long enough to have really experienced the full benefits of being clean and sober.
I found I needed to have faith and trust all the people here who said things will get better - and they really did
D
90 days is rough because it's long enough for us to forget the really bad stuff but not long enough to have really experienced the full benefits of being clean and sober.
I found I needed to have faith and trust all the people here who said things will get better - and they really did
D
Last edited by Dee74; 05-12-2015 at 09:46 PM.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,256
I wish I had 90 days like you do!!! Whenever someone relapses, they always regret it afterwards, I know I have! I hope you find something to add to your recovery that helps you stick with it. Don't give up those 90 days!!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Thailand
Posts: 824
Kelsey well done on 90 days & well done on recognising your addiction so young. Took me years so seriously hats off to you. Far better people to advise me on here than you but you smart enough to do 90 days clean - get the right support and understanding of what addiction is and stay strong!
Curmudgeon, Electrical Engineer, Guitar God Wannabe
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Where the mighty arms of Atlas hold the heavens from the Earth
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by kelseyteresa11 
On Saturday, May 16th, I'll be 3 months sober. I am a recovering cocaine addict. I've had this app for quite some time and this is my first post. I've just about given up. I'm having a very difficult time. Most have this stereotypical image of drug user, I don't fall into that image. Not many know of my addiction. I'm quite young and no one thinks it's possible for a 16 year old girl to be addicted to anything. I am. And I want to use. Groups have never been affective for me. Hoping for some advice on how to make it.
I'm glad you took the step to post.
I have a niece who really isn't that much older than you. She went through rehab for alcoholism over the Holidays, and recently finished IOP. So far, she's doing pretty well. She's going to meetings, working the steps, etc. It's big, big change for her, and a difficult one. As much as she may want to, she can never drink again. And that's because she knows if she takes one drink, she'll be off and running. One drink's too many. A thousand is never enough.
When I was learning about addiction a few years back, one book I picked up was It's So Easy (and Other Lies). It's written by Duff McKagan, who is the former bass player of Guns N Roses. When he was 30, he was hospitalized for a severe case a pancreatitis and was told if he continued to drink, he would die. It scared the crap out of him. So he quit booze and blow. How did he get sober? Well, initially he started doing mountain biking. Then, he got into mixed martial arts. He supplanted his alcohol/drug behaviors with positive behaviors. This is what worked for him. Eventually, he went back to school and he's about 4 credits shy of his degree in finance. In short, Duff's a remarkable guy, and one who is brutally honest about where he was and how he pulled out of that spiral.
My point is you can do the same. You're 16 years old. Yes, you're an addict. Yes, you're going to want to use. But if you allow yourself to do that, you'll be depriving yourself of everything this life can offer you. And this life offers a lot, more than you realize. So find what works for you, Kelsey. Coming here is a good start. Read. Absorb. See what resonates with you, because something will. There are a lot of positive messages here at SR. You just have to dig a little.
Be well, and keep us posted.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,746
Welcome and congrats on three months sober! 
Please don't give up on yourself. I'm sorry you don't have support at home. But you can come here any time of day or night and find support.
Please don't give up on yourself. I'm sorry you don't have support at home. But you can come here any time of day or night and find support.
Its_me_jen
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Salina, Ks
Posts: 8,547
Welcome Kelsey! You're in the perfect place for support. I'm so glad you're here and talking to us.
I knew I had a problem with drinking when I was a teenager. I went to my first AA meeting when I was 16. I hated it. It was a bunch of old guys I had nothing in common with.
Over the years my drinking progressed. I went to meetings sporadically, often drunk. The consequences kept getting worse. I really hated myself.
I was 33 when I finally got sober. I wish I could have done it earlier .... it took what it took but man, I'm lucky to be alive.
The early part of recovery is not easy but if you keep doing this and getting help from people who understand, and therapy and meetings (if you want that, it's NOT required) it gets easier. I can promise you that.
We're all here for you.
I knew I had a problem with drinking when I was a teenager. I went to my first AA meeting when I was 16. I hated it. It was a bunch of old guys I had nothing in common with.
Over the years my drinking progressed. I went to meetings sporadically, often drunk. The consequences kept getting worse. I really hated myself.
I was 33 when I finally got sober. I wish I could have done it earlier .... it took what it took but man, I'm lucky to be alive.
The early part of recovery is not easy but if you keep doing this and getting help from people who understand, and therapy and meetings (if you want that, it's NOT required) it gets easier. I can promise you that.
We're all here for you.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
I feel empty. Withdrawal is a real think
first off congrats on three months clean! you already have a basis for living a NON-using life, now you can build on that.
at three months, you shouldn't be experiencing any physical w/d's from coke, it has long since metabolized and made its way out of your system. the MENTAL thing tho......that's the tough part. are you 100% clean and sober from everything? because using other drugs, especially drinking alcohol will trigger the craving for coke like nothing else.
i'm so sorry that your parents aren't quite GETTING how serious the problem is...maybe they just don't want to BELEIVE their 16 yr old could possibly be addicted. DENIAL. try not to blame them too much. you must focus on taking care of you and finding recovery support.
have you spoken with a school counselor? NA can really be a lot of fun and good healthy support....i know AA has Young People's meetings. this is a meeting finder for both. Alcoholics Anonymous : Find Local A.A.
NAWS : Find a meeting
its great you have access to therapy. be sure to be HONEST ok? no more keeping secrets! you are a very self aware young woman to want to tackle this beast now.
i started smoking crack at 44. 4.5 years later finally quit the stuff for good. have over 8 years clean from that nightmare now. and i don't resemble your alleyway dope fiend either....i look like your local librarian. drugs don't care. they will take everybody down.
be well. i'm glad you posted!
first off congrats on three months clean! you already have a basis for living a NON-using life, now you can build on that.
at three months, you shouldn't be experiencing any physical w/d's from coke, it has long since metabolized and made its way out of your system. the MENTAL thing tho......that's the tough part. are you 100% clean and sober from everything? because using other drugs, especially drinking alcohol will trigger the craving for coke like nothing else.
i'm so sorry that your parents aren't quite GETTING how serious the problem is...maybe they just don't want to BELEIVE their 16 yr old could possibly be addicted. DENIAL. try not to blame them too much. you must focus on taking care of you and finding recovery support.
have you spoken with a school counselor? NA can really be a lot of fun and good healthy support....i know AA has Young People's meetings. this is a meeting finder for both. Alcoholics Anonymous : Find Local A.A.
NAWS : Find a meeting
its great you have access to therapy. be sure to be HONEST ok? no more keeping secrets! you are a very self aware young woman to want to tackle this beast now.
i started smoking crack at 44. 4.5 years later finally quit the stuff for good. have over 8 years clean from that nightmare now. and i don't resemble your alleyway dope fiend either....i look like your local librarian. drugs don't care. they will take everybody down.
be well. i'm glad you posted!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: New York
Posts: 35,731
Hi Kelsey!
I'm sorry your parents aren't supportive. My family wasn't either, I don't think they understood addiction. Regardless, I felt very alone. I tried and relapsed a number of times. Felt awful...but I found support here and it made all the difference in the world.
I think 3 months is amazing! I also think you're very brave to reach out for help. The members here understand, you're not alone.
Please keep posting... we care.
I'm sorry your parents aren't supportive. My family wasn't either, I don't think they understood addiction. Regardless, I felt very alone. I tried and relapsed a number of times. Felt awful...but I found support here and it made all the difference in the world.
I think 3 months is amazing! I also think you're very brave to reach out for help. The members here understand, you're not alone.
Please keep posting... we care.
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