Boyfriend relapsed, advice?
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: In the Middle
Posts: 632
My husband started with vicodin and percs in his early 20's. He now is addicted to heroin. This is the pathway there. Read some of my posts to find out the joys of living with an addict.
I'm also a recovering addict from a numerous amount of drugs. I wanted it.. with every fiber of my being, then protected it with just as much force.
Good Luck.
I'm also a recovering addict from a numerous amount of drugs. I wanted it.. with every fiber of my being, then protected it with just as much force.
Good Luck.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 14
When he quit pills the first time, he sold the extra he got out of the deals for the money. Now he's taking then again and messages on my phone from the person he's getting them for said he wants a piece of one for doing the favor. After I read that I was upset and didn't say anything but he could tell. He told me to calm down and I said I was trying to, and trying to deal with it. He said he was trying too but didn't elaborate, probably on the fact that he's trying to deal with me trying to be okay with it. It just kills me that he's using again and I really don't know if I'll ever be okay with it, no matter how little of it he does..
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 14
Before when he stopped using, the extra he got he sold. Now the cut he gets for doing the favors is for him. There's messages on my phone of him asking if he can get a piece out of the deal now that he's using. I saw it and was upset. He noticed and told me to calm down and I told him I'm trying, he said he was trying to, must've meant se trying to deal with the fact that I hate what he's doing. It just kills me to see him use again and I don't know if I'll ever be okay with it, it's on my mind constantly. I told him how much it bugged me yesterday but he doesn't want to change.
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 4,966
Btr you shouldn't have to be ok with it either! No, in fact if you were ok you would be just as sick as he is! You deserve better than this! Did you read my post? Please don't settle for the spouse or gf of an addict. You will never be first in this kind of relationship! Never! He doesn't even recognize he has a problem. If he's dealing or participating in deals you have that extra worry of getting evolved with the law. If you are living together that means you could be arrested as well if the police find it in your house. Please no love is worth the risk of losing your freedom and getting a record! This could ruin your entire life! Please think seriously about this! Do you have family or close friends you could talk with about this?
I went to jail for driving without a license and insurance. It was the scariest place I've ever been! I still have anxiety. Believe me I never thought in a million years I would step foot inside a jail. Stuff like this happens.
I went to jail for driving without a license and insurance. It was the scariest place I've ever been! I still have anxiety. Believe me I never thought in a million years I would step foot inside a jail. Stuff like this happens.
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: US
Posts: 729
If you were married my advice might be different, but I vote get out while you still can and don't have kids or a mortgage. He needs to clean up his life and stop being a drug addict and dealer for you to take the relationship further.
Do you use also? Because you probably will if you stay with him and believe me this is no life. Good luck to you!
Do you use also? Because you probably will if you stay with him and believe me this is no life. Good luck to you!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2013
Posts: 14
He even told me that if I stayed I would probably end up leaving him anyway sooner or later, and told me that I could do so much better than him. He said he wants to be with me and will try his best to make it work, but I feel like he would rather have the pills over me. The first time he quit he did because he was scared he would lose me if he didn't, but now this time around it's almost like he wouldn't even care if I left. So hard and confusing
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Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 96
Originally Posted by Btr13 
He even told me that if I stayed I would probably end up leaving him anyway sooner or later, and told me that I could do so much better than him. He said he wants to be with me and will try his best to make it work, but I feel like he would rather have the pills over me. The first time he quit he did because he was scared he would lose me if he didn't, but now this time around it's almost like he wouldn't even care if I left. So hard and confusing
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 4,966
Btr he's probably deeper into his addiction than you think. I was a master at hiding my usage from those around me. Especially my husband and kids. I wasn't thinking clearly at all. My main thought was the pills. Do I have enough to get me through the day or week? If not, how can I get some? The pills became my #1 priority. They were my best friend and closest family member. Everything else was second in importance. Please don't take it personally but that is the nature of addiction.
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: alabama
Posts: 222
Amen, TB. btr, you knew that he was taking pills before then you were driving him to get more pills and now you are surprised that he is using pills? Get real. Only you can choose what you want to do as far as staying with him, but he has come right out and told you he is not going to stop using. What else are you looking for? Do you need to see him cook up a shot or snort a line to believe that he actually has a problem? I jsut don't understand it. Also, it seems to be glossed over, but this guy isn't just a user, he's a dealer. Cops may not care too much about your regular, everyday user, but they sure are looking for dealers and you are helping him set up these deals. Be careful or you are going to be locked up with him.
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