ElectricE

I wasn't exactly sure where to put this but I needed to get this off my chest. I often think of my addiction as a person, it just makes sense and helps me cope, so I figured I would right "them" a letter (: let me know what you think of this idea!

Dear addiction,

Im going to be honest when I say I miss you. I could easily make a phone call and you would be here in seconds, but we both know I cant do that. Believe me, we had tons of good times together. You were my best friend, my amigo, I put you above everybody else in my life. When we were together it felt like, with you by my side, nothing mattered and I could conquer the world. I think I might have even fallen in love with you. Only after some time without you would I realize how much of a ****** friend you actually were. You didn't really care about me you just cared about being with me. The more we got together the more I would hate myself and turn on the people around me. I put everyone I actually did love through hell and back. But, because I loved you, I could never stay away for too long. I haven't seen you in 3 days and, even though its killing me how much I need you, I also know that I dont need you. And this time without you I will be the last time because im going to make this count and I will be successful! (:

cleaninLI

Awesome letter electric! It is so true!

ElectricE

Thank you cleanin!

Aems

It's a good begining. What I'd really be interested in hearing now is how "they" screwed up your life. It's honest to romanticize your DOC, I'm sure many have done it, but now let's hear about how it screwed up your life.

lrntolive

ElectricE - so true. I can totally relate to what you are saying. Thank you for sharing.

Interesting to see Aems mention romanticizing your DOC..... I never thought of it like that but very insightful.... I will be exploring that further for myself....

Hang in there ElectricE

ElectricE

Aems I will have to write a pt2 then! I just didn't want to make it longer I kind of wanted to make it straight to the point but I will definetly write another!

Irntolive thank you for reading! It was just something I needed to vent. I honestly do look at my DOC as someone would look at an unhealthy relationship.. Because it was an unhealthy relationship. Looking at it that way really put things in perspective for me!

Bubovski

Reminded me of a heroin addict when I was in de-tox;he kept talking about his love affair with the drug...............................also, words from The Piano Man: 'making love to his tonic and gin', hope that was a farewell letter.

cleaninLI

Yes, I felt like that was your 1st letter and more would be coming later. That's how I interpreted it. You know like you are going to write a letter at each stage of recovery. That's a great idea!

ElectricE

Murchovski ive never heard anyone else refer to it that way but I wouldnt be surprised if they did! It was for sure a farewell letter! (:

cleaninLI wow that is a great idea! I never thought of that but I love it! I feel like that will help me better understand my addiction as well. Awesome! (:

cleaninLI

Oh, electric I thought that was your idea! Lol

ElectricE

cleanin nope It never even occurred to do it that way! I just kind of had the letter on my mind and figured i would write it down. I might have to turn this whole thing into a blog lol

Kat60

You should ElectricE! Great start!!

cleaninLI

Yes, that would be a great idea! You are very good at expressing yourself, I'm sure your blog would help a lot of us here.

cleaninLI

It would also, allow you to see where you are heading in your own recovery. Thanks for your very inspirational letter! It is so true how we become so close to our addiction we begin to think of it like our best friend, but then as we start finding ourselves in bad circumstances because of it we realize it wasn't such a good friend after all. It would be interesting to see how your letters progress through your recovery.

ElectricE

Kat60 thank you for reading! (:

cleanin alright, I will look into that! I think it would also help me focus on my sobriety by writing all these letters about how much my addiction ruined a lot of the things I loved. Im really glad you all liked it so much. I had no idea I would get this much positive feedback!

wiscsober

thank you

DecBaby

I think it's a very good idea to put in writing the negatives for yourself.

ElectricE

I never really thought of that! (: ill probably do that tonight. Thanks for the feedback!