Fiorghra

hello ... i found this site after doing a few searches on the internet and i thought i could get some guidence or a general clue as to what im doing.

i recently met this guy ... instant connection like nothing iv experienced before and its the same for him. i didnt know at the time he was a cocaine user... and a very heavy user at that. iv never done drugs ..iv tried weed didnt work out for me n none of my friends are users so iv not got any clue really to things hes gone through. we met were just friends but that quickly became something more. he went cold turkey wen we started getting close he says because of how i make him feel thats theres something more out there for him other than drugs. he didnt like the person he was when using and im so proud of hime for it. but he doesnt go to meetings or help otherwise just himself. its been over a month now since he touched the stuff. but im looking for some help on how to help him now. i know he misses it. his behaviour often swings from one direction to the next within seconds. he can so easily get mad at me if i talk to someone or if i dont do what he expects. he reads things in what i say or what i do and accuses me of things that are so ridiculous i dont even know how to respond to what he says to me. he tells me he gave it up for me n thar if he lost me he would pprobably go straight back into it... and i feel so much reaponsibilty with that in my shoulders. we can fight or bicker and its always starts out with the simplest things that get blown out of proportion. hes quick to point out my flaws and things i do to annoy him when he fight it alwats comes back to him telling me i dont understand everything hes been through with giving up drugs...and i dont but i always listen and i tell him im there every step but ihave this contant feeling like im failing. hes a wonderful person and very loving and cares for me more than anyone has and then it flips to me feeling like a horrible person when he gets this way.

i love him very much and i think hes done so well. hes even distanthimself away from friends who use n used to give hime drugs cos he doesnt want to be near it. but he was heavy into drugs for so long he says himself its messed up his head... im guess im looking for advise as to what i can do or some insight from someone whos been through something similar and given up cocaine. im feeling alittle lost and i really dont want him to start using again

trikyriky

Fiorghra , I'm in no way knowledgeable in what you should. I'm a member . I just wanted you to know your voice has been heard , there is help / advice available . You yourself are not an addict . Your friend can only help himself if he wants it. I'd suggest you also post in the friends & family forum for more advice.

Alizae956

I too am a cocaine user and when I have tried to stop I also go through mood swings. I don't think it's that's we tend to turn the finger on our loved ones but you have to understand that our drug is our emotional getaway from our insecurities and past experiences at least in my case it was. So as advice just listen and compliment on improvements without drugs it always balances out my moods.