Tuffgirl - My Story
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Anchorage, Alaska
Posts: 4,719
Tuffgirl - My Story
I realized this morning that I am at my 2,599 post on SR, so I thought I'd tip the scale to an even 2600 by posting my story.
I am the wife of an alcoholic. We married in 2009, and are divorcing August of this year. We will now officially become one of the statistics of marriages that did not survive this journey.
But I have survived, and thrived in spite of it all, and I still love my husband very much, even given the circumstances we are in today.
Through my recovery journey I have learned:
1. to be open minded and as non-judgmental as possible, although it is progress, not perfection!
2. that everyone has a right to their own opinions, thoughts, perspectives, realities
3. that [needing, trying, wanting] to control someone else means I need to fix what is broken inside of me
4. personal boundaries are crucial, but flexibility is key to healthy relationships, and I have the right to be as flexible as I want to be
5. one day at a time thinking WORKS!
6. as I think, so I am. So if I want to change anything, I need to start with my own stinkin thinkin first and foremost
7. to let people go, even when it breaks my heart
8. to be the person I want to be, regardless of what anyone else thinks. After all, I am the one facing myself in the mirror at the end of the day
9. to continue to love and trust and forgive, no matter what others' do. Because that's the person I want to be
10. what doesn't kill us makes us stronger
11. to live life to its fullest every day, because we never know if each day will be our last
12. taking my own inventory every day gets easier and easier!
13. I am not an island; I am part of the larger human community and what I do and say affects others
14. keeping secrets keeps us sick
15. we all do the best we can with what we have to work with at the time
These are but a few of the life lessons I've learned over the last few years. I have no regrets, and I won't spend any more time looking over my shoulder - or as it is said in the rooms of AA and Al-Anon, I am ripping off the rear view mirror and focusing on what I can do and who I can be today. Life is good.
SR has been a wonderful resource for me during a very difficult time, and I am forever grateful for the friends, support, and hope I've received here! I hope all who read these stories benefit as I have.
Peace to all,
~T
I am the wife of an alcoholic. We married in 2009, and are divorcing August of this year. We will now officially become one of the statistics of marriages that did not survive this journey.
But I have survived, and thrived in spite of it all, and I still love my husband very much, even given the circumstances we are in today.
Through my recovery journey I have learned:
1. to be open minded and as non-judgmental as possible, although it is progress, not perfection!
2. that everyone has a right to their own opinions, thoughts, perspectives, realities
3. that [needing, trying, wanting] to control someone else means I need to fix what is broken inside of me
4. personal boundaries are crucial, but flexibility is key to healthy relationships, and I have the right to be as flexible as I want to be
5. one day at a time thinking WORKS!
6. as I think, so I am. So if I want to change anything, I need to start with my own stinkin thinkin first and foremost
7. to let people go, even when it breaks my heart
8. to be the person I want to be, regardless of what anyone else thinks. After all, I am the one facing myself in the mirror at the end of the day
9. to continue to love and trust and forgive, no matter what others' do. Because that's the person I want to be
10. what doesn't kill us makes us stronger
11. to live life to its fullest every day, because we never know if each day will be our last
12. taking my own inventory every day gets easier and easier!
13. I am not an island; I am part of the larger human community and what I do and say affects others
14. keeping secrets keeps us sick
15. we all do the best we can with what we have to work with at the time
These are but a few of the life lessons I've learned over the last few years. I have no regrets, and I won't spend any more time looking over my shoulder - or as it is said in the rooms of AA and Al-Anon, I am ripping off the rear view mirror and focusing on what I can do and who I can be today. Life is good.
SR has been a wonderful resource for me during a very difficult time, and I am forever grateful for the friends, support, and hope I've received here! I hope all who read these stories benefit as I have.
Peace to all,
~T
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