Snarf

Hi everybody. My name is Chris, and I'm an alcoholic. And by that I mean that I am my definition of an alcoholic, and no one else's.

I haven't reached a full year yet. God willing, that will come at 11pm EDT. But I'm pretty confident that I'll make it.

Well, it's been one heck of a year, and I'm not sure I could've done it without SR.com. My last drink was on March 24, 2010, but I didn't know it was my last drink until the next day. Long story short, I had been arrested for my 2nd DUI, came home the next day and wanted to drink myself to sleep, but my fiancee had stayed home from work because she was so upset about my arrest. I thank God that she did stay home, because since I didn't want her to see me drink right after getting home from the pokey, I created this convoluted plan to drive somewhere and drink my 2 tall boys and drive back home. That's when God slapped me (figuratively) upside the head and said, "What the heck are you doing? Normal people don't do stuff like this. Pour it out and get to a meeting." So I did, and I did, and I went to 4 that day, and when I came home I found this site.

If my wonderful fiancee had gone to work that day, I would've drank those beers, and I really don't know where I would be today. But I know that God put it on her heart to stay home, and I truly believe that saved my life.

Anyway, the year, as well as my life, has been more amazing than I could've imagined 365 short days ago. There have been lots of ups and downs, and there's so much more to come, but there have been 2 constants in my life: I haven't had a drink, and God has been with me the entire time. There's nothing that I have done that I could have done without his help, and he gets all the glory.

I used to live my life according to my rules. I didn't care what anyone said: my boss, parents, fiancee, siblings, friends, co-workers, and least of all God. I was going to do things my way, and that was it.

Well, my way got me into lots of trouble, and totally made a mess out of my life as well as other people's. I hurt lots of folks along the way, and while I will try my hardest, there's some fences that just can't be mended.

But when I finally stopped doing things my way, when I gave in and said, "All right, God, my way of doing things has really screwed things up; from now I'm gonna follow you," that's when I really began to see what my life could be. I began to finally feel empowerment by giving up the power that I thought I possessed. I finally felt freedom by giving in and doing things God's way. It seems so contradictory, but once I realized I don't have all the answers, I started knowing more of them.

It's been a long road, and at times it has been tough. But with God, SR, AA, and a fantastic supporting cast of friends and family, I feel very grounded in my recovery, and I'm committed to doing the next right thing, whatever it is, to make my life better. Hopefully I'm able to help a couple folks along the way, as I have been helped by Carol, Dee, Neo, least, Kjell, Anna, and so many others. We have nothing if we are unwilling to give it away.

Thanks to everybody here! My life would not be the same without this site, of that I am quite certain. I am so thankful for this awesome resource that is available to so many people. Thank God for the lives that SR touches every single day.

Everyone, enjoy your Thursday. I sure as heck will!