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Old 01-02-2008, 08:29 PM   #41 (permalink)
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Ann, thanks for that first post

I'm falling asleep now but that's on my reading list for tomorrow
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Old 03-16-2008, 12:35 AM   #42 (permalink)
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Letting go is just about the scariest thing I can imagine, Thank you for helping me <3
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Old 11-18-2008, 09:49 PM   #43 (permalink)
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letting go, letting God

Most of my life the idea of God was an abstraction, something for idiots. After repeated treatments, divorce, loss of everything but my life (and nearly that more than once), I would not stop. I complied, submitted, resisted, generally halfheartedly tried. I never was willing to give myself 100% to change. Finally, at the age of 50 I found myself in a special treatment center, one I had been to two months earlier. I would admit to you I was an addict and alcoholic, but I would not give up anything else. After nearly falling into another rehab romance, it happened....In a moment several things became clear and vivid, I had to let go of friends, family, relationships, material things, down to the way I thought. Until then nothing else worked. I had to let go of everything!! As I did that the war which raged inside of me ceased. There was peace. I saw, understood, realized, accepted.....For once there was unity within myself. My arrogance fell away and I went to my knees. To what I did not know, I simply knew that until that moment everything I had attempted in the past had failed. I was ready to change..Damn the fear...For me Letting Go is Surrendering...as in any war, for surrender to be effective, it has to be unconditional. Anything I was unwilling to let go of indicated a lack of total surrender.......A half measure. Since that moment my life has undergone terrific change. I have a God of my understanding, my ex-ex-wife and I are reunited, I am working at a treatment center (the one where I surrendered), and helping others. I live each day feeling the feelings and know I don't have to use to escape them. Life is a blast, be the days painful or not!! I had to let go/surrender to achieve victory. I had to die to be reborn.....Nov 27, 2008 I will have two years sober, longest I have ever been.............................................. .......Thank you Ann.
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Old 11-19-2008, 03:55 AM   #44 (permalink)
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congratuations 56

Quote:
I had to die to be reborn
i'm hear'n ya on that!

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Old 07-25-2009, 06:47 AM   #45 (permalink)
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thoughts meander like the wind blowing through the trees

I guess I am new here. Kind of a complicated place this internet forums anymore they are ... Yes? Tube Google Twitter face space my...
So anyways... Just saying hello. Haven't found a thread topic worth jumping into right now. I was in AA for 27 years. I ascended beyond the 12the Step.
I still attend Open AA Meetings and Al-Anon. However I may attend a Closed Meeting today. I guess I should read about the 12 Concepts for World Service. That is what my calling is today. I am a World Server. My vision is for Unity among all the races and kingdoms, Plant, Animal, Mineral.
We are in both exciting and perilous times right now. The best I can do is hold a Vision for Humanity in the Highest form I can and practice Rainbow Light Meditations. Peace to all who are near and Peace to all who are afar.
To all that have gone before and all who will follow after. I Send out my Love and Gratitude to my Guru all the Deva's and Diva's , the Saints, Sages, Lama's, and Dharma Bums. Medicine Men and Women. All the drummers and mummers... Swamih's, Yogi's. Yoginin's.. Sages, Shamman's, Crones and Beings of Light that are assisting us in this Great Work for humanity.
All is held in great and highest regard as I Open To Recieve and Transmitt my light out to the world.
Your Still The One !

Namaste
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Old 07-25-2009, 05:23 PM   #46 (permalink)
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welcome aboard jadi!

the 12 Concepts for World Service egh?

i took a look a few years back on it, and my head started spinning!

congrats on your spiritual time...

and hey, i march to a beat of a drummer...

i am one!

good wishes on your journey jadi

blessings

rz
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Old 09-23-2009, 05:18 AM   #47 (permalink)
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very insightful post. To let go is a good deed. You are not becoming a loser by letting go. You grow as a person by doing so. Other people feel good around you. Forgiving is the greatest virtue
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Old 03-14-2010, 06:17 PM   #48 (permalink)
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I let go within the past year and ever since my life has been better. I don't worry and things often work out. I've stopped fighting things I think I don't want. I accept them and figure there must be a reason. I even began to get lonely as I've been single since 2006, so I said to the Universe, "I'm ready, send me someone." Within one week, I met someone who seems perfect for me. I'm done fighting the natural currents of life and have been really enjoying myself.
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Old 01-01-2013, 08:15 PM   #49 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by harpo42 View Post
I agree with the idea of letting go, and I feel as though I have come very far in my 16 months of sobriety. But I have problems when it comes to a few points made here:

"We can let go of all the judgment, of fixing other people's problems, of manipulating and controlling people's lives close to us, and forcing our lives to go in directions that our logical minds tells us they must go."

What if people ask you to fix their problems? Or people are simply unable or unwilling to fix them themsleves? Should I stand by and watch them flounder when I could be offering them a hand? Isn't that selfish to NOT offer to help? To just "let go"?

James 4:17 says "Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins."

I am not trying to be a trouble maker here. I am having my own personal issues with my "older and wiser" parents who are putting me in a very awkward position and I keep making excuses to get out of it (such as letting go) but I think it is wrong of me to do that. Shouldn't I, as a human being and a Christian, try to right a bad situation that could get much worse if no one does anything about it?

You may say, "Who is she to say what is right?" but this situation involves a small child and a convicted sexual predator - there is no gray area here. I feel as though to not fix this problem that the people close to me are in is like watching a passenger train about to derail and instead of flipping the switch that could save them, I just stand there and wait for the crash!

I guess I am looking for validation that my stepping in and trying to "control" this situation is not a step in the wrong direction of my recovery and spiritual growth. I get angry and want to walk away every time I speak to my family about it, but I know that they will not correct the situation on their own and have told me that only I can do it (they are afraid of any reprecussions). I am afraid too, but I want to do the right thing.

When does "the right thing" acceptably fly in the face of "letting go"? Or does it ever? I need some advice here.... THANKS!
This has worked for me: Check with my Sponsor and ask at least two people whom I trust in for feedback on a perticular situation to see where I am at in my "own best thinking". I never know if I am thinking in my own best interest or my worst best interest. In the end of each thing, the final decision is ours to make for ourselves. I am practicing letting go of any percieved outcomes, I always begin to feel nautious when I start trying to control something even if I am only thinking about controlling it.
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Old 01-01-2013, 08:16 PM   #50 (permalink)
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This has worked for me: Check with my Sponsor and ask at least two people whom I trust in for feedback on a perticular situation to see where I am at in my "own best thinking". I never know if I am thinking in my own best interest or my worst best interest. In the end of each thing, the final decision is ours to make for ourselves. I am practicing letting go of any percieved outcomes, I always begin to feel nautious when I start trying to control something even if I am only thinking about controlling it.
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Old 01-01-2013, 08:17 PM   #51 (permalink)
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harpo42

This has worked for me: Check with my Sponsor and ask at least two people whom I trust in for feedback on a perticular situation to see where I am at in my "own best thinking". I never know if I am thinking in my own best interest or my worst best interest. In the end of each thing, the final decision is ours to make for ourselves. I am practicing letting go of any percieved outcomes, I always begin to feel nautious when I start trying to control something even if I am only thinking about controlling it.
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Old 03-21-2013, 08:20 AM   #52 (permalink)
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I've got an acquaintance, a guy I like...we work on the same project but for different companies. We're not quite friends. He's been battling cancer and yesterday he talked about going back in for surgery. He's had this cancer for 16 years, and in his words he "should have already been dead, twice." Yesterday he confided that this upcoming surgery really has him scared.
I listened, I felt compassion, but I had nothing for him.
This morning, I was thinking about what I could have told him and the one thing that came to mind was "everything is going to be alright." I read this "sticky" this morning and was struck by the words in the first paragraph:
"Put simply, when we let go, we trust that everything is going to work out in our best interest even when we are in the middle of an experience that screams out to us to hang on."
I printed out the entire essay and highlighted that sentence. Maybe I'll get an opportunity to share it with him before his surgery, maybe I won't. But I appreciate it that these wise words were here for me to discover, when I needed them.

It occurs to me that "letting go" is exactly what I'm asked to do in Step 3:

"Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."
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Old 03-05-2014, 07:01 AM   #53 (permalink)
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I must really, really, really love this sticky, because here I am a year later thinking again about my Third Step and I keep coming back to to same well.
As a Buddhist/Atheist/Agnostic/Whatever, I struggle with the Third Step: "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him."
The obvious question for me is: How do I turn my will and my life over to the care of someone/something that I fundamentally don't believe in? (And I say that with nothing but love and respect for those of you who are believers. Love, respect and maybe a little envy.)
When I ponder the Third Step I keep coming back to things like "acceptance" and "letting go." From what little I know and understand about Buddhism it's kind of fundamental that we recognize that everyone is suffering. Maybe not right now but eventually everyone deals with hunger, disease, loss, death...things that are quite often out of our control. Everyone suffers. That sounds a lot like the first step to me: recognizing that I don't control people, places and things and that my life is unmanageable.
I think the Buddhist equivalent to the Second Step is that the cause of our suffering is our futile attempts to try to hold on to things. We try to hold onto things that are impossible to hold onto: our youth (we age), our health (we get sick), wealth (the stockmarket may crash), possessions (things break, get stolen, wear out), the way other people once were (people change), the way we think other people should be (people don't behave the way we want them too), relationships (relationships are hard!). Trying to hold onto things that continue to wriggle out of our grasp can make us crazy, anxious, fearful, sad. "Came to believe that a higher power could restore us to sanity," becomes "came to understand that there is a reason we're crazy and maybe there is a better way."
Then the Third Step "Turned our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood him," is "letting go." Letting go doesn't mean "giving up." Letting go means we become completely comfortable and accepting of the truth that everything is impermanent. Pema Chodron writes that "the dharma (ultimate truth?) is a total appreciation of impermanence and change." We can fully and deeply appreciate the beauty of a cherry blossom, even though we absolutely know that it will inevitably wither and fall to the ground.
When I have acceptance of the world, exactly the way it is...when I let go of my ego and the way I would like the world to be, I can enjoy each moment. And even when I'm in pain, hungry, tired, sick, grieving...I can embrace impermanence and change and recognize that "this too shall pass."
“Letting go can be the most terrifying experience we can have. Letting go means having no support mechanism for our egos. Put simply, when we let go, we trust that everything is going to work out in our best interest even when we are in the middle of an experience that screams out to us to hang on.”
So imagine you're standing on the wing of a perfectly good airplane at 10,000 feet above the ground. Imagine that gut wrenching fear of letting go. Can you feel it? (I can!) Why would you ever let go?
For me the answer goes back to steps 1, 2 and 3. I recognize that I'm suffering, that my life has become completely unmanageable, and I'm absolutely desperate to find a better way of living. I'm told "let go, you may not believe it right now, but let go and everything is going to be alright." In my suffering and desperation, I'm willing to try something, anything different, so I let go..............
Wow.
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Old 05-31-2014, 06:23 AM   #54 (permalink)
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some good points in there about letting go that i can agree with

to the poster who has a problem with step 3 i found it hard as i dont belive in a god either
so what i had to do was mentally dismiss the word god and think instead of good or aa
this i found worked a treat as i believe in good and i believe in aa there both a power greater than me but it took a while for me to see them as a power

an old timer pointed it out to me when he said what do you do when your in trouble or in pain ?
i go to an aa meeting i told him or i contact my sponsor
then he asked me why did i do that ?
because when i do it it helps me
so you reached out for a power greater than yourself was his reply and bingo it hit me
i had indeed used a power greater than myself and still do
i dont need to believe in a god or religion they used the word god when the book was written as it was more popular back in the 30s for church and god to be in most family's house holds

but they found out that people who didn't believe in god could also find sobriety with the steps and i believe if the big book was written today that the word god wouldnt be used and replaced with the word higher power as it should of been like that in the start but they added it to the book later on as it was clear people were staying sober with other forms of high power

so try and just look past that one word and focus on good or whatever it is you believe in just so long as you believe it then your onto a winner
good luck
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Old 06-07-2014, 04:27 PM   #55 (permalink)
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WOW!! I really got a lot out of this thread! Thank you!
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Old 09-24-2014, 03:34 AM   #56 (permalink)
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Thank you!
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Old 05-28-2015, 11:36 PM   #57 (permalink)
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Imagine watching a video screen, and a video camera is supposed to be focused on your understanding of a Higher Power, but all you see is you, hogging the scene, and playing god.
Letting go means to quietly step out of they way, so the Real Deal can show you the way.
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Old 05-28-2015, 11:37 PM   #58 (permalink)
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Sorry, double post! Wish we can delete these.
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Old 03-20-2017, 06:06 PM   #59 (permalink)
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Wow I needed this today! Thank you
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Old 12-19-2017, 11:56 PM   #60 (permalink)
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Moksha(liberating)!

I was going to post a "woe is me" thread in the men's section about letting go of my now ex two nights ago. Then I decided to peek in the spiritual forum and saw this post. Within the last hour, I've begun to find myself again by letting go and letting divinity. It took me this long to read because I dug out spiritual books I never finished from my closet. I was on the verge of a breakdown and I see this work of truth. Thank you for strategically placing a drop of dew on a leaf through which the sun momentarily radiated, showing me the path less traveled! I am forever grateful...
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