Finishing up another Day 1
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 1
Finishing up another Day 1
And I know it will be a long night....
Had my last drink last night around 11pm before passing out.
Went on a 9 day binge after having 25 sober days --- didn't go in to work Wednesday - Friday because I was drinking my damn days away, although I added up my sober days for the year (since January) and I will have been sober for 70% of it. The longest stretch was 50-some consecutive days. I've struggled for so many years, but I'm noticing my binges getting worse now.
I'm a 38 year old single woman who has let myself be derailed on my day counts by bad dates or disappointed relationships. I'm so scared by how much damage I might've done to my liver already. I had a fibroscan done in July that was normal, but terrified what I could've done since then.
Looking for support and help.
Had my last drink last night around 11pm before passing out.
Went on a 9 day binge after having 25 sober days --- didn't go in to work Wednesday - Friday because I was drinking my damn days away, although I added up my sober days for the year (since January) and I will have been sober for 70% of it. The longest stretch was 50-some consecutive days. I've struggled for so many years, but I'm noticing my binges getting worse now.
I'm a 38 year old single woman who has let myself be derailed on my day counts by bad dates or disappointed relationships. I'm so scared by how much damage I might've done to my liver already. I had a fibroscan done in July that was normal, but terrified what I could've done since then.
Looking for support and help.
Hello Nyc,
I understand what your going through, as my last binge lasted 7 days with 5 of those days calling in sick to work. I also tend to get a few months under my belt, and then I allow something to manifest within me (the ugly beast) and I drink. But like you, I don't just drink 1 night, I drink for days. I see my behavior as drinking more to forget the problems that my drinking is causing...vicious cycle.
I am now reading and posting here each morning, and every time I feel the urge or my AV (ugly beast) is nagging me to join him in hell. I am at 37 days.(And I am a 47 year old female)
Please step back and take a deep breath, you can do this again. Try some different things, see what helps and hold on. Were in this together.
Peace and blessings to you
I understand what your going through, as my last binge lasted 7 days with 5 of those days calling in sick to work. I also tend to get a few months under my belt, and then I allow something to manifest within me (the ugly beast) and I drink. But like you, I don't just drink 1 night, I drink for days. I see my behavior as drinking more to forget the problems that my drinking is causing...vicious cycle.
I am now reading and posting here each morning, and every time I feel the urge or my AV (ugly beast) is nagging me to join him in hell. I am at 37 days.(And I am a 47 year old female)
Please step back and take a deep breath, you can do this again. Try some different things, see what helps and hold on. Were in this together.
Peace and blessings to you
keep in mind ...
its the 1st drink that gets us drunk not the 20th
we cant get drunk without that 1st drink
our choice is between miserable unhappy drunken drinking and all the consequences
or
not taking 1 drink
God bless
its the 1st drink that gets us drunk not the 20th
we cant get drunk without that 1st drink
our choice is between miserable unhappy drunken drinking and all the consequences
or
not taking 1 drink
God bless
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Sydney NSW
Posts: 350
If binges are triggered by dating and relationship disappointment, maybe stay single for a while and make your sobriety first priority. Newbies are advised to stay solo for the first year or so for this reason.
Good for you for realizing the binges are getting worse and knowing you need to do something. I binged for over 36 years. Stay close to SR reading and posting and make a plan. It gets said over and over here in the forum but it helps. Before I always just said I was going to quit and the AV/HALT always got me. I also never really understood or believed in the power of PAWS - I do suffer from it and have admitted it to myself this time. Look up those acronyms and read extensively on here and elsewhere - this time I am educating myself about myself and learning from the wisdom of not so much scientists but the people who have lived it is being essential this time. I have been reading a lot of alcoholic memoirs and those have been helpful.
You can do this
You can do this
Missing work, blacking out it all sounds so familiar.
It might help being afraid of bad liver test results but it wont be enough.
You have to want sobriety like you never wanted anything in your life.
I know I do.
Keep coming back.
Join the december class.
It might help being afraid of bad liver test results but it wont be enough.
You have to want sobriety like you never wanted anything in your life.
I know I do.
Keep coming back.
Join the december class.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)