AV wins every two months or so. tired of this.
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 30
Originally Posted by lessgravity 
For me it was, in the end, all about values. I know that sounds sanctimonious and self-righteous, but I really do believe it. I love RR and reread it again just before getting sober for good about 15 months ago. But it was the fact that I, finally, chose to value the things that I was sacrificing to booze more than the booze that got me sober.
My family, career, body, spirit, money, dreams, every single thing - were all sacrificed on the altar of alcohol for year after year. If I drink again I will sacrifice them again. No thank you. My life is worth more than that.
My family, career, body, spirit, money, dreams, every single thing - were all sacrificed on the altar of alcohol for year after year. If I drink again I will sacrifice them again. No thank you. My life is worth more than that.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: casablanca
Posts: 282
Almost a year to date since I had written the original post. Had gone through few relapses since then. Have got 4 months sober now. been using a mixture of AVRT, mindfulness, counseling, bit of AA here and there, childhood trauma recovery.....ect
Everyone's journey is different such as everyone's upbringing is different.
Everyone's journey is different such as everyone's upbringing is different.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Nice goin' there, Shakeel. Remember that this sober life is your due, not the one you have chosen to leave behind you, the life filled with anxiety and anger and disappointment and regret. You deserve a life without all that crap, I'd say. Well done, you.
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Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,152
I think all of us spend a lot of time coming to grips with our problem. It begins as a dim awareness, then some self questioning, and then a lot of denial to the effect that we don't really have a problem, at least not a serious problem. It sounds like you may be somewhere in that process of not really quitting. You are processing. Some go right into some program or another and then wrestle away for years, until they sort it out and take action. Taking action is that point where you quit. But you've already quit a few times at least, right?
Well, maybe not. Quitting is where you decide to quit for good, and this is not just that simple. I know before I quit I held on to the idea that I might find a way to manage my drinking; Quit for a while, but eventually learn to manage. I'm going to go out on a limb and say everyone of us has this fantasy tucked away in our subconscious. We don't really want to quit when there is a chance that we can manage. Unfortunately, that is not the way alcoholism works. Management is not going to work. You don't need to ask why not. Just come to terms with the fact that it's not.
I quit when I entered a downward spiral that scared the crap out of me. I could see myself headed toward the gutter. I doubt that I would have actually landed in the gutter. I probably would have killed myself to avoid the humiliation. It was a given that I had to stop for good and stop messing around with thoughts of managing my drinking. After that it was like someone cleared away an impenetrable road block, and I was able to get on with my life.
The thing is that embracing a totally free from alcohol life is more wonderful than holding out for a miracle that is never going to happen. Maybe this describes you. You will have to decide if it does. Otherwise, just disregard everything I just said.
Well, maybe not. Quitting is where you decide to quit for good, and this is not just that simple. I know before I quit I held on to the idea that I might find a way to manage my drinking; Quit for a while, but eventually learn to manage. I'm going to go out on a limb and say everyone of us has this fantasy tucked away in our subconscious. We don't really want to quit when there is a chance that we can manage. Unfortunately, that is not the way alcoholism works. Management is not going to work. You don't need to ask why not. Just come to terms with the fact that it's not.
I quit when I entered a downward spiral that scared the crap out of me. I could see myself headed toward the gutter. I doubt that I would have actually landed in the gutter. I probably would have killed myself to avoid the humiliation. It was a given that I had to stop for good and stop messing around with thoughts of managing my drinking. After that it was like someone cleared away an impenetrable road block, and I was able to get on with my life.
The thing is that embracing a totally free from alcohol life is more wonderful than holding out for a miracle that is never going to happen. Maybe this describes you. You will have to decide if it does. Otherwise, just disregard everything I just said.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: casablanca
Posts: 282
@freshstart57, I have always wanted to make it up to you for sending me the book, but could never get my life in order to do so.
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