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Old 01-11-2018, 04:35 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by dwtbd View Post
I prefer being a nondrinker, billions of people do
That is a very good point. Sometimes I need someone to point out the obvious to me because my mind has become so clouded by addiction!
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Old 01-11-2018, 07:57 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Welcome to the 4 year club MesaMan. Congrats.
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Old 01-11-2018, 08:37 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Truly Badass, MesaMan. Well done.
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Old 01-11-2018, 10:11 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by AlericB View Post
These accounts are really encouraging. This encouragement really helps, helps me anyway, because like a lot of the biggest choices we make in our life, making a BP is not a purely rationally made decision.

While we're still drinking, we can't possible know what it would be like to be someone who has permanently quit. Making a BP is a transformative experience and as far as drinking goes we may feel like we've become a new person. This is obviously great but the downside to its transformative nature is that we can't know what it would be like to make a BP until we've made it. Our future non-drinking self is fundamentally different as far as drinking goes, in our values and in what we enjoy for example, from who we are while we are still drinking. This difference is that our future self has undergone the experience of making a BP and until we have that experience we are simply unable to view drinking from out future, post-BP perspective.

But reading accounts like these may encourage us to take a step of faith/trust and make a BP even though rationally we may be feeling unsure as to whether or not it is the best plan for us.
Purely rational? Hmmmm... For very many, the decision to quit drinking wasn't a short term or quick decision. I've tinkered with the idea of quitting for over a decade. I fooled myself many times thinking I would cut back or take some time off. I did once quit for a year. And then right back to pounding beers on the anniversary of my quit for a year date. Yeah, I was counting down the days till I could drink again. But there comes a time, whether it is the cumulative effects, outside pressure, just got tired of it, or a single event - it took an event to wake me up, that we all just know it's time.
As for the the future outcomes and etc., I have read a lot about alcoholism from the scientific standpoint to the "it gets better" anecdotes from other reading to believe that being a non-drinker has more upside than downside. When I lost my job I swore I was never going to let alcohol affect my life ever again. So I made a big plan before I knew there was such a thing as a "Big Plan". It was only later I discovered this forum and AVRT. And when I read about it it made perfect sense. I tried and attended 'other' things and all it did was make me feel I will suffer for the rest of my life with that inevitable 'relapse' looming over my shoulder and as long as I made today I could worry about tomorrow tomorrow. That's no way to live. I read the 'crash course' and it made perfect sense. By making a big plan, I no longer had to be concerned about failing because I didn't do x, y or z, or stop going to sessions with some stranger telling me how to do it. Drinking was no longer an option. As long as i was able to recognize the "beast" I was in charge of me.

I think of the guy who did that "Supersize Me" documentary. He ate nothing but burger king super size everything for a month - slowly killing himself in the process. But he knew it was for only a month and he would be able to recover. I guess what I mean is that by removing the poisons from our system we are able to get well - both physically and mentally. How can one not think that quitting alcohol will be an improvement?
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Old 01-11-2018, 11:11 PM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by LBrain View Post
But there comes a time, whether it is the cumulative effects, outside pressure, just got tired of it, or a single event - it took an event to wake me up, that we all just know it's time.
I can relate to much of that but the part I've underlined is why I think making a BP is not a pursely rational process - it's also undertaken intuitively.
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Old 01-12-2018, 01:55 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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In the past, a couple of times when I'd go away to another city for a weekend, I'd drink, tell my wife I'll stop before going home and did so.
I have been holding on to that thought - "When I'm away I seem to be able to drink and not bring it home".
Oh Beastie.
That little line you've been feeding me has now been put to bed.
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Old 01-12-2018, 03:44 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by AlericB View Post
I can relate to much of that but the part I've underlined is why I think making a BP is not a pursely rational process - it's also undertaken intuitively.
I went to the doctor. I told him it hurts when I do this. He said, "Stop doing that."

Not sure I understand what you mean. Are you implying that one with alcoholic tendencies or under the influence is incapable of making a rational decision? Unless one is 100% inebriated 100% of the time, then I'll agree. But even the "best" of us drinks have our moments of clarity along the way. If this was not so, we'd all still be drunks.
I think intuition does not come into play here because I intuitively drank every single day. It was the only way I knew how to cope with life. However, you toss a baby - an infant - in the water and it will intuitively attempt to swim. Don't over think it. The fact that you are able to debate yourself over something shows rational thinking.

It's more a matter of do you really want this or not. I'm not suggesting you don't. It just seems like you are still on the fence, still looking for 'holes'. The only 'hole' in this entire process is one's ability, or inability, to be able to recognize anything at all that goes against their will to not drink. Any thoughts at all that would lead to a drink are to be recognized and understood to be the "addictive voice" in your head - AV. The "beast" or any number of titles one wishes to give it. It is a battle in the beginning because the beast is very strong - he has been running your life for quite some time. But the longer you are able to shut him up, the quieter he gets and eventually he rarely if ever comes back. In my early days I actually found myself saying out loud, "I will never drink again and I will never change my mind," while driving down the road and the thought of a drink crossed my mind. It works, it really does. Shuts that beast right up.
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Old 01-13-2018, 12:09 AM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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Interesting post but we probably shouldn't derail Sohard's introductory thread by what may turn out to be a lengthy discussion - I don't think there are any knock-down arguments one way or the other on this question. Perhaps start a separate thread?
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Old 01-13-2018, 12:25 PM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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No worries. I've been enjoying reading it. I'm still trucking along. I breath a sigh of relief and gratitude each day that passes sober. Of course, I don't want to count my new life down - we only live once!
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Old 01-14-2018, 07:13 AM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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wolo
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Old 01-14-2018, 08:48 AM
  # 31 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by dwtbd View Post
wolo
We Only Live Once.

Done With The Bloody Drink?
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Old 01-14-2018, 08:51 AM
  # 32 (permalink)  
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Hey, a prime candidate for my "what's my user name mean" thread which has proven to be about as popular as a pork pie at a vegetarian wedding
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Old 01-14-2018, 10:37 AM
  # 33 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by AlericB View Post
Hey, a prime candidate for my "what's my user name mean" thread which has proven to be about as popular as a pork pie at a vegetarian wedding
I know:-) Turned out to be a bit of a damp squib. I had such high hopes!

I thought it was a fun distraction anyway.
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Old 01-14-2018, 10:43 AM
  # 34 (permalink)  
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Let's hope Tatsy reads this and throws us a ball
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Old 01-14-2018, 11:04 AM
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I've already worked out Tatsy's.
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Old 01-14-2018, 11:18 AM
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You mean you and Tatsy have played this game without me?

And I've had to find out like this?
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Old 01-14-2018, 12:07 PM
  # 37 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by AlericB View Post
You mean you and Tatsy have played this game without me?

And I've had to find out like this?
Sorry:'(
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Old 01-14-2018, 12:58 PM
  # 38 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Trohyn View Post
We Only Live Once.

Done With The Bloody Drink?
Yep, made my BP right around the time I found SR and learned about RR/AVRT.
You?
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Old 01-14-2018, 01:34 PM
  # 39 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by dwtbd View Post
Yep, made my BP right around the time I found SR and learned about RR/AVRT.
You?
Indeed, the same. What I was playfully implying was your username; Done With The Bloody Drink.
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Old 01-14-2018, 01:43 PM
  # 40 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Trohyn View Post
Indeed, the same. What I was playfully implying was your username; Done With The Bloody Drink.
lol, gotcha
don't
want
to
be
drunk
Am still a hunter and pecker on the keyboard, picking a username that didn't roll off the fingers , I thought would help with positive reinforcement , it worked It was an imperative and now is a declarative , though I like your version too
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