Addictive Voice Recognition Technique (AVRT) Discussion — Part 6
 

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thanks Dee, I had not seen these posts prior to now. Very informative.

I suggest to all, if you haven't done so already, read through the postings listed in the first post box as provided by Dee. Good stuff.

I had an interesting thought I wanted to share to see what people think-

The mental image I have of my Beast is that It is locked in a cage with absolutely unbreakable bars, with an unbreakable lock on the door. It can shout and scream all it likes but I won't let it out.

I realised that the mistake here is; Why is there a lock and a door in the first place? That implies the Beast can be let out.

I redesigned the cage, there's no door anymore.

I took a slightly different approach to my beast, as is shown in my signature.

Lonely...I dont think it's a mistake to have a door and lock on the cage. After all, you hold the key, which means you hold all the power!

I see the point there brynn

But why not just weld the cage shut and be done with it? Why would I need a key if I'm never going to use it?

Now the Beast likes the idea of a key because that means there is a possibility it could be used one day. No key, no chance of escape!

Lonely....I kinda like that too!

Actually, I've never really had a clear mental image of my beast so this has got me thinking!

6 months ago it was seductress, siren for me. Now? more like "new and improved" or just "shiny crap". Bad relationship still rings true.

Bad relationship rings true for me too. That guy who seduced you really really good in the beginning.... wine dine 69, but who is now slapping you around, spending all your money and trying to seduce your friends.

That part of the brain still serves a purpose. Its flight or fight response, for example, can save our lives in an emergency. This is why I would at least have a door and lock on the cage. I want to have a relationship with my beast wherein I am the master and appreciate the beast for ONLY that which serves me and my safety. It seems more integrated and wholistic to me somehow.

By definition, the Beast is ONLY the desire for the substance a person decides to never ingest again.

I am proposing that hating the beast is a form of self hatred, which is the last thing we hedonists need. There is no TM on Beast, so I shall take the liberty of creating my own definitions of what it is and how it lives in me.

I have long identified myself as a hedonist.... I love sex, drugs, booze and house music. Part of my strugle is letting go of that hedonist in me. Becoming a go to work come home take care of the house and family watch tv go to bed rinse and repeat zzzzzzzzzzzz..... like what is the point? I find myself daydreaming about the day I can escape from my bondage... sell it all and do something! Is that my AV or my spirit?

That's you AV. It's not an either/or question IMO. You don't have to be a 9 to 5 schmoe or a drinker/partier. You can be spontaneous and a free spirit without alcohol and drugs.

Well I feel bare without them. Anhedonia is a word I learned from this site. I have that. I don't feel like I used to. I want to disconnect. My orgasm is not what it used to be... still there but elusive sometimes. Sorry if its too much info but this is the recovery site so there. I don't get pleasure. I feel flat. I'm isolating and want it like that. Depression might be a word but I hate using it for myself. I feel like I"ve lost the plot. What is the point again? What is the goal? I can be funny and fake it but it's all just a show... underneath it all I don't feel right.

zenchaser,
it takes time for feelings to emerge again for lots of people.
give yourself that time, and then take it.
and after some feelings come again, you might find that they are "off".
the brain takes a while to get to a stable place again...

From the RR website:

"Addictive Voice Recognition Technique®, (AVRT®), Rational Recovery®, and Beast® are service marks registered with the United States Patent and Trademark Office."

And since this series of threads is about Addictive Voice Recognition Technique, I think it is important to stay on track to prevent confusion.

AVRT defines the Beast so clearly in me, and spotlights it so well as a single-minded quadriplegic that it doesn't rise to the level of being hatable. I suppose I might hate IT if I could not totally dominate IT, but I can.

I don't know how long you've been sober, but give yourself some time. You're making some big changes, but you will adjust. I also suffered from anhedonia. Nothing really excited me, but I threw myself into sober life as best I could. I started exercising, eating better and I started to invest in myself by learning new skills that will help me in life.

So far those actions have helped me greatly to begin to just enjoy life as it is. And honestly, after all my crazy, drinking nonsense, I'm enjoying a quiet simple life.

I know this is a thread about AVRT but I would like to respond to Zenchaser just for this post.

Zenchaser sorry to hear you're feeling flat, I agree with others that if you give it time your natural enjoyment of life will return. I know what it's like to feel like you don't enjoy anything, but sooner or later, could even be today, you will find yourself doing something that you find pleasant, could be reading, cooking, exercise, taking care of the house etc and you'll realise there is enjoyment to be had when sober, it might just take a little while to get there.

Personally I get that hedonistic buzz from weight training, it works for others too. It's about getting that endorphin rush from physical exercise (The AA'ers would tell me that getting a buzz from weight training isn't acting 'sober')

Do you have any hobbies you enjoy sober? If so, get back into them, find that fascination and enjoyment from the small things in life that alcohol/drugs blinded you to.

Back to the discussion of AVRT -

I find it helpful to remember the Beast has no physical capabilities of it's own, it can only use yours.

But I was intrigued to read in RR; TNC about the Beast taking control of motor functions. In the anecdote about the man feeling exhausted after a day at work, then he gets the idea to have a drink and suddenly he feels awash with energy. I've felt the exact same exhilaration in the past and was wondering then;

If the midbrain controls the release of pituitary functions such as adrenaline release, is this something the AV does to you? Or is the rush of energy and sudden lift in mood only a result of when You (Neocortex) has failed to recognise the AV and made the decision to drink/use?