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Misc72 08-24-2014 03:28 PM

Need a reminder
 
I'm approaching 9 months alcohol free. I'm starting to get really bored with life. I keep seeing all my friends out on the lake parties down having fun being goofy. Or I see Facebook pics of the local bar rock scene. And there are s i me parts of that life that I really miss. Hmmmm makes me feel anxious to see all that fun going on. I need some action and excitement. Got the hobby thing. AA is not for me so how can I go about finding sober friends that are fun! Outsde of a meeting?

Received 08-24-2014 04:56 PM

Do you have any interest or hobbies? Meetup is a great place to look at events and activities if you're state side. Also, a lot of communities have Facebook Community Information pages where you can learn about events, and meet people from your area.

PurpleKnight 08-24-2014 05:04 PM

I really had to think about my interests, what did I want to now achieve in life, new projects, new activities, and with those came new people!!

The universe doesn't not revolve around alcohol, there are non drinkers having fun every day, we can too!! :)

MythOfSisyphus 08-24-2014 10:18 PM


Originally Posted by sunshine72 (Post 4858373)
I'm approaching 9 months alcohol free. I'm starting to get really bored with life. I keep seeing all my friends out on the lake parties down having fun being goofy. Or I see Facebook pics of the local bar rock scene. And there are s i me parts of that life that I really miss. Hmmmm makes me feel anxious to see all that fun going on. I need some action and excitement. Got the hobby thing. AA is not for me so how can I go about finding sober friends that are fun! Outsde of a meeting?


You know, this is a great question! Speaking just for myself I kind of recalibrated my idea of what "fun" is. Sure, the people being loud and stupid at a bar are having "fun" in the sense that they're enjoying the activity. But I really look back at the "fun" I had and realize it was a waste of time. It didn't enrich me at all, intellectually or socially. In fact, it does the opposite- the people you social with drunk often don't have anything to do with you when you're sober. So you spend years cultivating this club of people to get drunk with but often don't develop any real friendships.

You could still hang with people in bars and still have fun, provided you drink a soda and they don't get too plastered.

Beyond that I'm not sure. I have only been sober for a little less than two years and haven't really made many new friends. I work full time and go to school, so I don't really have a lot of time to socialize. When I do it's usually with my family.

doggonecarl 08-25-2014 06:16 AM

Missing out on all the "fun" has been an ongoing problem for you. Fun as defined as drinking fun. Your AV playing with your mind. Myth is right, you need to change your definition of fun if being sober is keeping you from having any.

If you have made your Big Plan, and you are never going to drink again, then the only thing keeping you from having fun without drinking is you.

aasharon90 08-25-2014 06:46 AM

Fun for me is accomplishing something
I can take pride in. Something Im excited
in starting, keeping it up, staying with it,
and seeing the results in.

Like gardening. See, about 5 yrs ago, I met
my now husband and saw that his wife of 35yrs.
who passed away of illness, had flower gardens
all around their home. Front, back, sides.

When I saw the gardens and how they had
gone down after she passed, I didn't want to
keep up all the work and so decided all I
wanted to was ride motorcycle with my husband.

I cleared all the gardens to make the yrd
simple for cutting and that was it. THEN.....
One day, I saw a pretty butterfly flutter way
out back around a sad looking Camillia bush
standing all alone.

Even tho I had never met my husbands
late wife Jane, I sensed her presents with
the pretty butterfly and the Camillia bush.

So, I began to take care of it and low
and behold I became inspired to plant
flowers that would attract butterflies,
then Hummingbirds, those cute bumble
bees.

NOW, you should see my backyard. It
looks like my own Nursery full of flower
beds, a deck my husband had built for
us and a cover he built to shade the patio
plants, unbrellas. :)

Sure its work to keep it up, but the
pay off is more than words can say.:)

It's an accomplishment. A Joy. A gift.
A blessing. All to be enjoyed in RECOVERY.

And yes we still ride our Harley Road King
to Sturgis, Daytona and the Grande Canyon.

Life in recovery is worth enjoying and
appreciated. :)


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