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Old 05-07-2014, 08:31 PM
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hang time

Anyone have strategies for having fun in the presence of alcohol use? I' not referring to strategies for remaining abstinent, as those abound.

What if you're comfortable with not drinking, but things seem a little boreing and loud? I know i should have an exit strategy, but dont necessarily want to bolt at the 45min. Mark at every wedding reception, birthday, haloween, and new year party.
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Old 05-07-2014, 08:48 PM
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I think like anything learning to be social sober is a skill and you learn it.
I'm not sure how long you've been sober now but you need to give it some time

Personally I don't like big events that much, but today I went out with a small gang of new people and had a great time.

We've all made friends and sparked up conversations without alcohol, even if it was when we were kids...you just show an interest in other people or what they're saying and start from there

D
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Old 05-08-2014, 05:11 AM
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I read something about mindfulness that I thought was pretty trite and trivial at the time. The writer was waiting in line at, say, the doctor's office, and when he received an apology for the delay, he said, 'Not at all, I was enjoying myself'. And then, to himself, he said, 'I was in joy, in myself'. Enjoying myself, in joy in myself. They don't sound all that different to the ear. Hmmmmmmm.

Maybe this still isn't very profound, but it shows me how little externally I must have to be content, and that the key is that internal stuff. It can apply to any situation I find myself in, including being around alcohol and people consuming it.

In a month, I will be in a remote cabin on a lake in northern Ontario for some trout fishing with old friends with whom I have long and storied history of tremendous amounts of alcohol consumption. But there will also be solitude, wilderness silence, loons, the aroma of pine trees, and a camaraderie that can only come with old friends. That joy and beauty will be all around me with no alcohol to mess it up.

Best to you.
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Old 05-08-2014, 05:16 AM
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Originally Posted by leviathan View Post
What if you're comfortable with not drinking, but things seem a little boreing and loud?
Probably cause they are.

Worrying about New Years is a little premature, but I can't fault you for wondering about it. Come 2015 you may discover that the only reason you attended many of these social events was the drinking, and with you not drinking, they may not hold the same appeal.

As for the other events, receptions and what not. It might be wise to skip those in early sobriety, or stick to the 45 min. limit. Why? That loudness and boredom you speak of might drive you to drink if you choose to stick it out.

Good luck.
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Old 05-08-2014, 05:31 AM
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Sometimes the "world" people, places,
things in it are way to loud. Too noisey.
Too much drama. Recovery has taught
me that it's okay to be still. To be quiet.
To keep life simple. Simple can be a HUGE
word in recovery, yet very effective.

I don't always have to be doing something.
If I can accomplish one simple, little task
each day, then ive done my job, even if
it means to not pick up a drink.

I like simple. Simplicity. Taking time
to enjoy the wonderful gifts provided
to us, that surround us. Like nature.
Like the weather. The flowers. The
smallest of little creatures. A spider
who has fallen in the pool. Or a frog.

They deserve life just like we do. So
each morning I walk around the pool
saving the littles lives. What a joy it
is to do the simpliest thing in sobriety.

Coming here to SR even with 23 yrs.
of recovery to read the many shares
of those just beginning their own journeys
in recovery and passing on my own ESH
experiences, strengths and hopes with
them gives me so much joy and purpose
in life and sobriety.

Having a purpose in life makes the dullest
days in life have more meaning.
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Old 05-08-2014, 05:25 PM
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Thanks yall. Good stuff!
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