Just got attitude from someone in AA
 

Why are those people so preachy? I'm just not a rah rah AA'er.

I would say many here find recovery through a program and believe in the said program. I see it both ways its less about the program in my opinion and more about holding onto what has worked. As people make their minds up they are closing themselves off and then judgement comes in. I have been on your post that your referring too and I think you may have been caught in the crosshairs, I don't think it was personal.

Your doing a good job. I too tried many different programs and taking bits and pieces from what works for you is a healthy approach to recovery.

Post right here that you don't think AVRT will work, and you might get a dose of non-AA preaching. :)

Not all of us are preachy.:P Some of us just like to toot their horns a little too loudly. Lol. I know what you mean though. I have avoided certain meetings where the super preachy folks are, just because it doesn't quite work that way for me.

Long as you're here and you're sober who cares what got you here. :)

I am not an AA member but I will challenge you to look at the words "those people". I find that when I start thinking that way about anything it is because my mind wants to simplify and put people into categories.

The problem with humans is that we are squishy and don't fit neatly into boxes…:).

'those people' are just finding there way out of this hell just like we all are. Warts and all:)

Ah, Kissimee, I just tell myself that some folks simply don't know differently in general and they don't know better in particular. If someone's point of view is emotional, there is no possibility of a rational discussion, those feelings keep getting in the way. Any questioning is perceived as a personal affront and an insult, and the personal attacks are the result. And the preaching goes with the territory too if you think about it. It's just the nature of it.

So, what else would you like to talk about?

I would not blame an entire fellowship for the comments made by one person.

They are on a journey to. One day they will have a revelation about where they are at right now.

Take what you need and leave the rest.

Let go and Let God.

Kissimee54, you asked a question in the other thread. People responded in order to answer that question. Despite her caution that you not take her words in the wrong way, I believe that you have. It was not 'attitude' that was displayed, nor was it irrational as freshstart characterized it. Quite the contrary. It demonstrated, with your own words, just how irrational your own behavior was.

It might not be pleasant to look at, but I believe she spoke the truth.

You know what? People are just too darn touchy. I think I'm taking a break from this sight. Thanks all.

People are just being people. We're all imperfect. We all have good days, and bad days. Its best to be as open as possible, but not so open that we end up feeling overrun by everything. We're all just doing what we can being ourselves....

Kissimee…I hope you stick around. Think about this. We are dealing with a highly charged subject, one that represents life and death to many of us. Many people have strong beliefs about what has worked for them. When I first came here I had a reaction too, I was looking for people to commiserate with my criticisms. Then I realized that being part of a group is a strong part of the human condition.

If I went to Weight Watchers and talked about Jenny Craig and how it was better I probably would get a pretty strong reaction, especially if Weight Watchers had changed some peoples lives. If I got into Harvard and then proceeded to find everything that was wrong with it I doubt I would become class president. The strongest way to shore up a group is to introduce external conflict.

Look at us in the States, after we were bombed during 9/11 no one cared about whether you were Dem or Rep, we were Americans, period. Yet fast forward to the most recent election, we had a lot more pronounced internal divisions. We become protective incrementally of whatever group we imagine ourselves to be a part of.

Nobody here bites…I promise. And we need Weight Watchers as well as Jenny Craig (especially us newly sober munch heads!).

Kissimee - we have all been where you are...I have left this site several times. I have flamed on wanted everyone to say please don't go and then licked my wounds and come back. The funny thing about sobriety and then recovery is you learn so much about yourself in this process. I literally feel like I have compressed 30 years into the last seven months. It gets exhausting sometimes.

I too have had my own words thrown back and in fact had the exact same reaction as you. Its natural. If you do leave do it temporarily bc you add to this site. Your asking the right questions to make us think and make this place better and who knows what you will write that will seed for someone else. We are all just trying to pay it forward in our own way - some are better at it than others.

BTW - Jaynie summed it up pretty well. AA vs. RR is like Democrat or Republican (now I will invite people to argue about which one wants to be the Dems and the Republicans) - but see through the partisan lines bc in the end we all just want to be alive and happy through sobriety!

Didn't Kissimee post on the secular forum. Hmmm. I thought that was for people who use other things besides AA. So why are people getting all weird??

I do not see anyone being weird on this thread.

Look at the thread title. If I drive around with a bumper sticker that says "righties are annoying" it is very different than driving around with a bumper sticker that says "lefties rock'.

Catchy title, and one sure to get a lot of hits, but having a discussion within the confines of a forum versus posting a negative comment on the outside of a forum might be the difference. I have looked at other forums where it is a free for all, they disintegrate into pissing matches and no one comes away with anything but the short term satisfaction of verbally one upping one another. The longer I am here the more I respect the civility we all practice.

Maybe this is a good way to open up a discussion about thread titles. Not to get all Big Brother but being able to post thread titles that could be considered inflammatory? Something to think about. Kinda like throwing something out in court and then striking it, the point was made, whether softened or rescinded, it still was put out there.

I have seen threads locked in the secular section of the forum for a lot less mentioning of AA than we have seen so far. I've never been able to tell exactly what the standard on that is, but I won't be surprised if this thread has a limited life.

Hi Kissimee :)

If you think a post to you has breached the rules, you can report it. Use the http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ons/report.gifsymbol on the post.

If you don't want to see that posters posts again you can put them on ignore.

What you can't do is use this forum to complain about AA or AAers.

The secular forums rules are pretty clear.

Dee
Moderator
SR