A thought about counting...
Trudgin
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 6,348
I had to look at sobriety calculator that is the home page of a twelve step book app I reference.
126 today. I don't count, the app does - but had to look today as I couldn't remember?!
That's pretty exciting today. Perhaps down the road it will not be as important or graduate to years, decades....
Had an older gent in a meeting say to another newcomer who constantly referenced his days sober. You keep counting those days cause no one else give a...........
126 today. I don't count, the app does - but had to look today as I couldn't remember?!
That's pretty exciting today. Perhaps down the road it will not be as important or graduate to years, decades....
Had an older gent in a meeting say to another newcomer who constantly referenced his days sober. You keep counting those days cause no one else give a...........
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: SoCal
Posts: 76
I quit one particularly bad addiction sometime in January or February of 1990 - don't know the exact date. There had been many "this is the last time" instances only to do it again. It wasn't until about two years later when I realized that that particular time had really been the last time. And now it's been over 24 years.
Similar with smoking cigarettes - one day I just quit (no idea of the date) and went roughly six years without smoking. Unfortunately, I started up again about a year ago.
Alcohol has been the only thing I have sought treatment for, and I have counted days because I was told to. And I've started over, and over, and over many times now. At one point, I went for about five months without counting days, yet I started over once again. For me, it's gotten to where counting the time/days just feels like I'm counting the time/days until my next drink.
So I guess in my personal experience, counting days has little to do with breaking my addictions. But that's just me. If it's helping someone else, then I suggest they keep doing it.
Similar with smoking cigarettes - one day I just quit (no idea of the date) and went roughly six years without smoking. Unfortunately, I started up again about a year ago.
Alcohol has been the only thing I have sought treatment for, and I have counted days because I was told to. And I've started over, and over, and over many times now. At one point, I went for about five months without counting days, yet I started over once again. For me, it's gotten to where counting the time/days just feels like I'm counting the time/days until my next drink.
So I guess in my personal experience, counting days has little to do with breaking my addictions. But that's just me. If it's helping someone else, then I suggest they keep doing it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 508
So today I'm one year and 1 week since my final drunk.
The anniversary felt daft & like I needed reminding coz of how bad it was and all the reasons I need to stay stopped.
My friends and family have congratulated me on a year clean but I feel it's no cause for celebration, other than personally when I think of my sober date (07/10/13) as the day I started learning to live MY life again!
Interesting thread and interesting how perception can change depending on your method of counting, or not!
Congratulations on being sober to each and all of us that make it through and learn how to deal with addiction, day on day, week, on week, month by month, year by year and decade by decade.
Time is a human invention and I don't do very well with it, preferring to live by mood or circumstances, as a 'free spirit' not bound by norms but of course in the life I lead it does have significance!
Seasons and weather changes have a bigger impact than counting time to me.
Driving my wagon of hope through beautiful views on my road to myself
The anniversary felt daft & like I needed reminding coz of how bad it was and all the reasons I need to stay stopped.
My friends and family have congratulated me on a year clean but I feel it's no cause for celebration, other than personally when I think of my sober date (07/10/13) as the day I started learning to live MY life again!
Interesting thread and interesting how perception can change depending on your method of counting, or not!
Congratulations on being sober to each and all of us that make it through and learn how to deal with addiction, day on day, week, on week, month by month, year by year and decade by decade.
Time is a human invention and I don't do very well with it, preferring to live by mood or circumstances, as a 'free spirit' not bound by norms but of course in the life I lead it does have significance!
Seasons and weather changes have a bigger impact than counting time to me.
Driving my wagon of hope through beautiful views on my road to myself
Deaf to AV
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Western NYS
Posts: 62
It's only been 17 days for me so I'm counting with glee! For now it's how I'm marking my accomplishment. This journey is where it is today, maybe a time in the future will see counting as superfluous, but all I really have is now. Day 17 
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,937
Apropos of nothing, when I drank for the last time I knew it was gonna be the last time. So I had the mother of all drunken blowouts! Drank nearly five bottles of wine- I was sick for two day. Stupid but I didn't want to feel like I "missed out" on anything.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Eastern Us
Posts: 1,366
I don't count, but I know when I had my last drink and I will share it if someone asks... Mostly as an example to someone new that as I'm nothing special and stopped, they can too. I remember how hard it was to get that fist day, then week... Seems to me that sometimes it might give someone hope to learn that people like them put the drink down and got on with living.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: Boston, MA
Posts: 13
Originally Posted by ru12 
I don't count, but I know when I had my last drink and I will share it if someone asks... Mostly as an example to someone new that as I'm nothing special and stopped, they can too. I remember how hard it was to get that fist day, then week... Seems to me that sometimes it might give someone hope to learn that people like them put the drink down and got on with living.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by MaggieMai
He feels the counting makes a person feel in control of the situation, and gives them a sense of accomplishment.
I always celebrate my years sober in AA meetings. At my home group and at a group in the desert I take my yearly tokens. They say that they are not for us - but - for the newcomer.
MM
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Lakeside, Ca
Posts: 10,208
Originally Posted by samseb5351
I am not really sure Dee what Bob said that he needed to be reminded this is A Secular Forum?
I didn't think that my post was that far off of some others ??
the name of the thread is counting days and I count days
can one not even mention AA here ??
MM
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: New Orleans, LA
Posts: 985
For me, the most dangerous thing about the "counting time" ethic is that when I relapsed, I didn't want to "lose my time" for "one night of insignificant drinking.". So I drank for months, just to make the "starting time over" worthy.
I'm in my first 90, and am keeping track because I have a long term plan & it shifts slightly at the 90 day mark (I'm adding in some commitments toward health). I'll mark months after that, & will celebrate each passing year after that as my New Years of self. I like celebrations & giving myself treats - for all sorts of personal accomplishments (my addiction was my prior "treat," but I made the shift to alcohol being toxic poison (& cigs & drugs), so now my treats are spa fussing & travel & taking the day off work, etc.
I look forward to transcending our cultural obsession with time marking (in so many forms), but it is still useful, so I'm still hanging on. True internal change is all circles and doubling backs though, so the linear score-keeping doesn't match my experience.
I'm in my first 90, and am keeping track because I have a long term plan & it shifts slightly at the 90 day mark (I'm adding in some commitments toward health). I'll mark months after that, & will celebrate each passing year after that as my New Years of self. I like celebrations & giving myself treats - for all sorts of personal accomplishments (my addiction was my prior "treat," but I made the shift to alcohol being toxic poison (& cigs & drugs), so now my treats are spa fussing & travel & taking the day off work, etc.
I look forward to transcending our cultural obsession with time marking (in so many forms), but it is still useful, so I'm still hanging on. True internal change is all circles and doubling backs though, so the linear score-keeping doesn't match my experience.
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