Lurker
 

I have lurked here off and on for years and now I am ready to say hello to you all. You have helped me secretly,especially recently. I had given up on getting sober because I just couldn't do the whole higher power getting me sane and sober thing. I had never heard of AVRT. It was weird because I was telling my husband how the addiction talked to me and then I read here and found out there really was a addictive voice. I guess it never occurred to me to just tell it to shut up before. Way Cool. Anyway I hope to get to :e082::e082:know all of you better now. Nice to meet you.

Welcome to the posting side of things Irishish :)

D

hello, lurking-no-more Irishish,
and welcome to posting.
i found actually participating actively a vastly different experience from just lurking and it's been hugely beneficial to me.
hope the AVRT explorations continue to be fruitful for you. no matter what, don't give up on getting sober! there are many different ways people are doing this, and you can, too!

One of the things I am grateful for is the laid back attitude and acceptance I see in this forum.I have been unable to stay sober for any period of time for a while now. I have a little hope and I feel that if I really try I can at least make some progress. Still scared to death but the one thing I have in my favor is an extraordinary amount of tenacity. This has served me well or not at all depending on what I am getting sticky about. Thank you for the welcome.

Welcome Irishish.

Have you taken the crash course at the Rational Recovery AVRT website?

If you're interested, just google Rational Recovery AVRT Crash Course. It's quick and easy.

One thing, it is strongly suggested that you do not take the crash course if you're currently drinking or using.

Glad you found us.

Today is day 3. Feel empowered by telling my av to go fry ice.

Way to go irishish...welcome to the seccies page..keep on keeping on huni...day 3 is awesomo..xxx cleo xxx

Welcome Irishish,

The lack of a pronoun before "Still scared to death..." speaks volumes about the ambivalence within you about drinking some more and about how you're doing with AVRT. Good work by not letting IT steal "I am..." from you to say "I am scared to death..." IT is obviously scared to death. You are out to kill IT.

The truth is you are now getting proactive and excited about putting your addiction AND recovery behind you; and IT is scared to death.

Yes, you are both "tenacious"; but IT is a quadriplegic blob and cannot even make you wiggle your pinky finger.

I found iit useful to have a certain fear of the consequences of drinking; but not of my ability to easily recognize and fairly quickly dominate my Beast.

GT

Hi Irishish-
Always love to "cyber-meet" new people. AVRT/RR has really helped me in changing my thinking and recognizing that I am in control. The people are amazingly supportive. 3 days really is wonderful. Jess

Thank you for the support.It is very hard at times. I think it is partly because I still have lots of old programs running in my head. Iam not an ace at kicking the beast to the curb yet, but I figure with practice I will get better. I have followed you guys on here for a bit, I feel like you are becoming friends already. My books came today- the RRTNC book and a new book called The Craving Brain. I just woke up (work nights) and it looks like I will have time to read tonight. I DO still feel unsure of myself and the separation thing is awkward- The av is at a constant level of white noise in my head but at least I am not white knuckling at this point. jkb- I read your thread and although I know all thoughts of use are beast, I want to say that I thought the part where you used again and wanted to give up gave me a lot of hope. I like the concept that I don't lose whatever time I manage to get. I have failed miserably so many times that I have a lack of belief in the long term at this point. That having been said- I have more hope than I've had in a long time. I want to leave the alchohol behind-my addiction does not. It is remarkable to me that I had already separated the two myself. I told my husband a few days ago-It is hard to bulid a secure fence when the other part of you knows where the weaknesses are. AVRT lets me know the weak spots and still defend my fence accordingly. I have already gotten so much help here. Thank you all. Sorry so long, I am usually not much of a talker. I am going to read my books and look forward to the BP.:headbang:

I think this can work:c029:

I liked this "I told my AV to go fry ice".
What a wonderful expression! I'm going to try saying the same to mine!

:lmao::lmao:

Fixed that for ya...;)

Welcome. Xo

Day 5. Feel pretty good about things. I haven't had a bad time of it so far. The beast is just buzzing around back there off and on, kind of annoying at times but otherwise manageable. I wonder if its saving up for a big push or if I just kicked it so hard at first that its still whimpering. Oh well-hard to say. Today is a good day and I am off to work.

Hi Irishish, so glad you found us here, and found something which will lead you forward.

Some time soon, you will understand that it matters not a whit what your AV/Beast does, saving up for a big push, or hiding in the bushes making growling noises. IT IS POWERLESS, and it becomes powerless simply because you say so.

This is a mind game, true, but it is a mind game that you will win because you get to make all the rules. You get to decide that you have the power to never drink again, and you get to choose to believe in yourself and your ability to succeed. No matter what happens to you in your life, no matter what events befall you, no matter how your beast/parasite twists and lies, you will succeed because you say so.

So go do that. What you are doing is making a dramatic and epic move to transform your life. This makes you a bona fide BadAss, you know. Onward!

Welcome, Irishish! I remember my first couple of weeks very well. I was pretty scared, but coming here helped to boost my confidence and now I'm over 4 years happily sober. Let me assure you that it does get easier over time as we find new ways to live and be happy. Stick with it, the rewards that come with sobriety are tremendous.